Page 26 of Just a Little Crush
“Oh, fuck.” His jaw drops and he pulls away from me, panic in his eyes. “You’re a virgin?”
“No,” I laugh it off, but his reaction makes me uncomfortable. I mean, I know I haven’t had sex in a long time, but does he really think I made it to my thirties without doinganything? As my body cools, reality hits. I’m half naked. In Rennie’s bed. And he made me come. Multiple times.
In all my fantasies about him, I’ve never considered that the aftermath is far more vulnerable than the act itself. I cover my hands with my face until we both break the silence at the same time.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to imply—“
“I’ve just—“
“You go,” he says.
“I’ve never done anything like that.”
“What do you mean?”
“Nobody has ever made me come like that. You made it all about me.”
“As it should be.” He reaches out to tuck a loose strand of hair behind my ear. Oh now he’s back to being a gentleman, and the guilt rolls in. I’ve not even made an attempt to satisfy him, and the tent in his trousers looks painful at this point.
“I, um, do you want me to...” I nod downwards, “you know, help you out?”
“No, you need to rest.” He pulls the covers back, then reaches underneath me, lifting me gently to one side of the bed before covering me up. Walking around to the other side, he takes his clothes off and I try not to lose my mind at the sight of his gorgeous, naked arse right there in all its ripe, toned, biteable glory. To my great dismay, Rennie pulls on fresh underwear from his drawer then settles next to me on the bed but stays on top of the covers.
“Here, sit up,” he says, lifting my neck brace off the nightstand.
“I’m not putting that stupid thing back on. It’s revolting.”
“Don’t be so stubborn.”
“I’m fine. If you can just fetch my crutches, I’ll go.”
“You sleep here.”
I hadn’t thought about it in the moment, but I’d assumed I’d go back to his spare room after we were done. Mission accomplished, help administered, absolutely ridiculous favour granted. Why would he still want me here?
Then I remember his words.
“All this time, I thought you were a sweet girl.”
“I’ve waited my whole life to get my hands on you.”
“Do you know how long I’ve wanted to taste you?”
I thought this was all about me. Rennie gave me exactly what I wanted, but could it be that I’ve given him something he’s been craving too? Has he been thinking about me the way I’ve been thinking about him? And if he has, where do we go from here? Our friendship will never be the same again.
“Renn,” I whisper.
“Yes, baby?” he says quietly, stroking my hair away from my face. His hair is all over the place, and I love knowing it was me who messed it up.
“I will never be able to look at you the same after this. And I can’t believe you had the nerve to call me a filthbag.”
He laughs softly, dreamily, and when he tips his forehead to rest against mine, I am completely, utterly gone.
14
Bec
Renniehassleptwithone arm around my duvet-covered waist all night, the other tucked up underneath his pillow. I slept better than I have in ages, but I’ve been lying here for a while thinking about how to get up and pee without bursting this bubble.
