Page 20 of Just a Little Crush
“Nothing, I’m just frustrated.”
“I know, Bec, you’ll be back on your feet soon enough.”
“It’s not that, I’m—“ he hovers in the middle of the room.
“What?”
“I’m... I’m super horny OK?” Rennie stands there staring down at me and I, full of shame, look down at my feet. “I know, you’re right, I am a filthbag but I haven’t come in ages and orgasms are a form of stress relief, you know, and I can’t do shit with my arm like this and I’m actually going insane.”
When he doesn’t say anything, I glance up at his face. I expect to see a look of shock, but he’s biting his lip. His arms folded across his chest, he taps his fingers against his bicep.
“Don’t laugh at me.”
“I’m not laughing,” he says. “I’m... processing.”
I roll my eyes and pick up the remote to flick through channels, but he swipes it from my hand and hits the off button.
“Do you want me to help you? With this… problem.”He’s surely not serious?
“No, I could never ask that of you. I’m just venting, sorry.”
His silence drags on and on. “You could ask.”
“What?” I don’t know what’s more mortifying, this or the audiobook nightmare I still haven’t managed to strike from memory.
“You could ask. Ask me.”
I pull a blanket up over my face. “I think that’s pushing our friendship a boundary too far, Renn.”
“So push it.”Oh fuck, he is serious.I can’t even look at him.
“Bec,” he says, his voice deeper as he leans over me and pulls the covers back. He rests his fists on either side of my hips and I stop breathing when he lowers his face unbearably close to mine. “Ask me to help you come.”
Blood roars in my ears and I swear minutes pass before I finally get the courage to squeak out my words. “Could you help me come?”
Rennie closes his eyes and inhales deeply, a pause just long enough to make me regret this entire conversation. “Oh god, OK, you’re playing with me. Don’t worry, I’m being ridiculous. I’m an awful mess. I’m just frustrated and really I don’t have much success with guys touching me anyway, so it’s pointless.”
He’s still not moving. This is so embarrassing, and yet, unfathomably, I keep prattling on. “Forget I said anything. I’ll survive. I’ve already survived a freak accident, how bad could a few days without an orgasm really be? I mean plenty of people goyearsand they’re just fine, so... Jesus Rennie, are you going to talk soon or are you going to let me keep rambling all night?”
Rennie ducks his head into my chest and before I know it, I’m being lifted up and over his shoulder again. “Let’s go.”
11
Bec
Rennie’sthickforearmwrapsaround the back of my thighs, holding me tight as he carries me past the spare bedroom, down the hallway, and into his.
This can’t be happening.
I’ve never been in here before, though I’ve dreamed about it many times. I should be taking in every detail, but whatever is happening right now is not in this universe, and I can’t concentrate on anything but his bed when he perches me on the end of it.
I don’t know where to look while he adjusts the pillows into a pile. Opening his bedside drawer, he pulls out a small bottle and rests it on the nightstand.What is that? Oh my god, is that lube?Lube! Why does Rennie have lube, and who thefuckis he using it with?
He must see me staring and cuts my brain spiral off before I get even more enraged at the thought of him with anyone else. “Massage oil.”Ah. Ohhh.
He settles himself in the middle of the bed, sitting up against the headboard. I just sit there, awkward as hell, while he parts his legs and pats the space in between them. I shimmy up until his hands grip my waist and pull my body into his.
“Lean against me,” he says, and I do, wiggling a little to get comfy. I fold my arms across my stomach, tuck my knees up. I’m a bundle of nerves.
