Page 118 of Cruelest Contract
This morning I took a test. Then I took another one. I’m never late and I’ve been feeling queasy and sore so the results were not a shock. Both were unmistakably positive.
No one knows, not even Alice. Julian needs to be the first to hear the news and I’m determined to tell him in person. Until he returns, the secret will be mine alone.
With a smile, my hands gently outline the flat contours of my belly. Any doubts I might have felt no longer matter. I’m going to have a baby. Julian’s baby.Ourbaby.
Earlier, I found an online pregnancy calculator. According to the date of my last period, I’m due the tenth of March.
For so long I’ve lived without a family. Now I’m building one of my own.
But grief is a treacherous creature, always lying in wait. It chooses now to strike.
My mother would havelovedto be a grandma. She adored babies. She once said she would have had more children, if not for her emergency hysterectomy right after Gabe and I were born.
And then there’s Teresa. Everything I’ve learned about Julian’s mother indicates she was a doting mother. Her grandchild will never know her either.
Footsteps rapidly click in the hallway. I recognize Mel’s purposeful walk and I grab a tissue to dab at my eyes before she pokes her head into the room.
“Hey there, hon. Lunch is about to be served. Enzo’s focaccia bread is divine. Cass and the boys are already waiting in the dining room.” While she talks, she moves to a window, straightening a panel of the rose-patterned curtains.
The day dawned sunny and brilliant but outside the window, the sky grows increasingly grey and gloomy. The wind has also picked up.
“I didn’t know we were having a formal lunch today,” I say.
Mel turns around, smiling. “Cass requested your presence.”
‘Requested’. That’s funny. When Cass Tempesta makes a request he expects to be obeyed.
However, I’m too hungry to object. My stomach wasn’t in the mood to be fed earlier. All I ate for breakfast was a piece of dry toast.
Mel crosses the room with concern pinching her mouth. She places a cool hand on my forehead. “Are you feeling all right? You look a little pale.”
“I’m fine,” I assure her.
She drops her hand but continues to look worried. “I know you miss Julian. I’m sure he’s thinking about you too. He’ll be home soon.”
I do miss Julian.
But I’mnotso sure he’s also thinking about me.
And I have no clue when he’ll return.
This, I have to remind myself, is what I agreed to when I married him. I just never counted on this persistent longing for my own husband. I didn’t realize how badly I’d wish to come first with him. Or how devastating it would feel to understand this will likely never happen.
None of this is Mel’s fault so I make an effort to smile. “You’re right. I’ll go to the dining room in just a minute.”
She starts to walk away, satisfied that her mission is complete.
“Mel, did you know Teresa?” I blurt out.
She turns and her face wilts with sadness. “I first met Teresa when she was a child. Frank, my husband, was friendly with her father and we used to eat at Gino’s often. Oh, she was a lovely girl. So friendly and thoughtful. It’s often said that some people have a way of brightening any room they enter but in Teresa’s case it was true. No wonder Cassio was smitten from the moment they met.” She cocks her head and inspects me more carefully. “Are you sure nothing’s wrong, sweetie?”
“I’m just hungry,” I tell her and this answer makes her brighten.
“Then let’s get you fed,” she says and happily escorts me down the hall to the dining room.
The Tempesta men are already assembled at the huge dining table that unfurls across the room like a dark wood tongue. They are alone, leaving most of the chairs, high-backed and upholstered with crushed red velvet, unoccupied. With the sun disappearing behind clouds and the chandelier lights flickering, the room has never looked more like a gothic movie set.
Fort gives me an impish grin and Getty stews in his chair with his arms crossed, grumpily waiting for their father to signal permission to dig into the platters of food on the table. Since both Julian and Tye are gone, I feel very conspicuous as I slide into the chair between their two empty seats.
