Page 4 of A Spinster for the Rakish Duke
Emma’s eyes lit up, and she had to stop herself from exclaiming in a most improper fashion. Still, her excitement was quite noticeable when she stood straight up. “Donovan? It’s you! Oh my, I wish I had been prepared for this. I feel like I have come close to embarrassing myself already,” she admitted.
“I was only able to realize it was you because you talk in the exact way I imagined from your letters,” he laughed. “Though I assure you that is a good thing.”
“I wasn’t doubtful until you made a point of reassuring me,” she laughed a bit nervously and cursed herself on the inside.
“I must admit a slight embarrassment, Miss Bradford. Take the pen from my hand, and I will certainly embarrass myself without any sort of filter,” he admitted, coming off a tad nervous himself but still comfortable enough. “Though I must admit, I was surprised at the openness of your last letter, considering that we have discussed little with one another outside of our academic interests. Though, I guess if we are meeting now as planned, then that must just be serendipity,” he said with a bit of a chuckle, trying to read her reaction.
“Ah, yes, the last letter. Well…” She thought for a moment and searched for an answer. She was so caught up in the excitement of meeting Donovan for the first time that she had completely forgotten about the letter that her sister had sent in her name. How could she admit to what happened? To his face? That might be just embarrassing enough to kill her outright. But was that less embarrassing than pretending that she had written those things to him?
“I suppose we do know relatively little about each other,” Emma said, hoping to change course. “Perhaps, I was a bit forward.”
“Forward? I don’t know if I would say that,” he offered delicately.
“No, no, I don’t even know what you do for a living,” she inserted. “What is it? You do, that is,” she amended.
This gave Donovan pause. He didn’t want to lie to Emma, but he realized he wasn’t comfortable revealing his title to her. He had always signed his published papers and letters without it, wanting his words to speak on their own merit. Admittedly, he didn’t think she was the type of woman to take advantage of him, but what if he lost the only person he could talk to who didn’t see him as a Duke? He couldn’t stand the thought of that.
“I’m an investigator by trade,” he told her, not sure what else he could suggest.
“An investigator. My, what an interesting and intriguing profession to end up in,” she said, meaning it genuinely.
“Well, I suppose so. My brother is the Duke of Lowe, and since I didn’t inherit the title but had the chance at an education, I was able to go into what I thought I would be skilled in.” Why was he adding to this lie? He certainly wasn’t trying to impress her. What did he have to gain?
“Oh?” she said thoughtfully. “That’s so interesting. I mostly had to care for my family from a young age, circumstances as they were, so I never had time to consider marriage, honestly.”
Something we have in common, Donovan thought to himself. “And you found yourself studying the field of geology in your free time?” he asked, wishing to satiate his own curiosity about his dear friend.
She nodded. “As my siblings grew older, I found I had more and more time to myself. I enjoyed reading so much, I am afraid I ended up becoming more than a bit of a bluestocking,” she laughed with a touch of lingering embarrassment.
“That was another thing that surprised me about your letter. You mentioned you were unmarried. I presumed a woman your age and interests would be either married or a widow. Instead, the letter you sent definitely suggests your interests lay elsewhere.”
“Well, that is a rather complicated subject,” she admitted, uncertain about what to say next.
“Isn’t it always,” he admitted. “Do you want to know something, Emma? I rather liked it, the letter,” he admitted, his voice softer, and he stepped closer, so she could hear him speak.
“You did?” she asked, unable to mask the disbelief. After all the hours of rhetoric they had exchanged, she rarely imagined her friend as a flesh and blood man. If anything, it was a thought she avoided. If Donovan was a man, there were underlying implications she had to consider. Men were complicated creatures that confused her, so she had thought of Donovan more removed from his person, a friend she spoke with and nothing more. Physicality was messy.
“I did. It was very interesting. Planted some rather surprising ideas, if you were curious,” he said slipping even closer. He leaned in as if he was about to whisper in her ear. The idea of him so close thrilled and terrified Emma. He didn’t whisper though. Instead, he planted his lips on hers in a delicate kiss.
The kiss was gentle, but passionate, his hand tracing along her cheek and jaw to embrace her. Emma had never been touched like this in her life, and it made her burn with a need she didn’t know was there until it ignited.
Emma folded, surprised at how much she wanted to embrace that moment. She wanted to keep kissing him more than anything, but she felt herself breaking away.
“I-I-I- I can’t,” she said weakly. Very weakly. She didn’t want to stop. More than anything she wanted more.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have presumed. I must have misread the intentions of the letter,” he was quick to apologize.
“Yes! Wait, no! It is… very complicated. The letter... that isn’t why I can’t,” Emma found herself hesitating to reveal the truth, but not out of embarrassment. She didn’t want him to think she didn’t write the letter now. Why? She was so confused. The kiss mixed up everything.
“We can’t because I am engaged,” Emma confessed, turning away from Donovan, not wanting to see the anger that statement would bring. “It’s improper. It would make both of us look quite bad if anyone were to find out. Even if you didn’t know better,” she said, trying to soften the blow.
But there was no anger on Donovan’s face, only confusion. “Engaged? But... but your letter…?”
“That letter was written before my engagement came to be. My aunt arranged it, and it is something that I must honor. I’m sorry if this was... disappointing to you,” she said before taking a few steps away. “I wish our first meeting had been a bit more pleasant, Donovan. I’m sorry that wasn’t the case,” she said quietly before slipping back to the party, leaving Donovan standing alone in the quiet dark evening.
What both of them failed to notice, since they were so caught up in the exuberance and disappointment of their unexpected and ill-fated meeting, was the person standing in the shadows on the balcony above them, who had seen and heard much more than Emma and Donovan would ever have wanted.
Chapter Four
