“Taylor, you said you would let it go.”
He frowned.
“No, I didn’t.”
“Just drop it. I don’twanta boyfriend.”
It was so much easier to lie than tell the truth. I wasn’t like Taylor. He was handsome and charming when he wasn’t on the floor nursing a messy breakup. He was one of the rare people who wasn’t in any way socially awkward or uncomfortable in his own skin. People were drawn to him, they liked him right away. That was why he couldn’t relate.
I was small compared to most guys. Not just short, but thin too and no amount of working out or eating seemed to be enough to change that. I wasn’t as naturally good-looking in general. It was like I had been dipped in whatever goodness Taylor was created from. I looked a bit like him, but I was a lesser version in all ways. And everyone I’d ever dated had agreed.
Even if someonedidlike me for a hot minute, whenever they met my brother, their interest shifted and that sucked more than anything. Ever since Sam, my first boyfriend had called out Taylor’s name during sex, I dreaded dating guys long enough for them to even meet him. I hated seeing the way my partners looked at my own brother.
Add to that the fact that I was naturally quiet and shy and that was enough to do the rest.
It didn’t bother me too much though. I was used to it at this point and as much as it sucked, I wanted Taylor to be happy more than I wanted a boy, so there was that too.
Deep down, I hoped that one day, someone with terrible taste would prefer me, but until then, I did ice cream runs when Taylor had breakups. They used to be booze runs, but that hadturned out to lead to more crying, not less, so we had a no-sad-drinking rule in this house.
The movie started. Some silly-looking horror with a doll that I’d randomly selected. As the credits played, I was able to push our conversation to the back of my mind until a phone started to vibrate against my leg.
I froze knowing I’d left mine in my jacket by the door.
Taylor was watching me with wide eyes.
“Do you think it’s him?” he asked.
I paused the film and lifted his phone. Sure enough, Neil’s name was glowing on the screen.
“Don’t answer it,” I pleaded as Taylor took it back.
“If I don’t, it’ll drive me crazy.”
I watched, biting my nails as he answered with a heartbreakingly hopeful note in his voice.
“Hello?”
There was a long pause as he listened.
“Not this week,” he finally said. “I’m busy.”
And with that, he hung up.
For a minute, Taylor sat there, biting his lip, looking up at the TV as he clearly tried to hold it together.
“He just—wanted to come by to get his stuff,” he finally choked.
“Oh. Shit. I’m so sorry.”
I scooted over, pulling him into a hug.
He took a shuddering breath.
“I just can’t believe theaudacity.All he has left here is a sweater. Why can’t I just keep it? It’ll be hard enough to see him at the ball. He’s probably going to go with that dickwad his parents like. Therichone.”
I’d heard it all before. For months they’d fought over the guy whom Neil’s parents had deemed‘A more suitable match.’
I imagined it stung to be the person your partner was loweringthemselves for.