Page 80 of Daddy's Muse
He set everything up just how I liked it—blankets on the floor, Butter hopping around, my coloring books stacked nearby. He even made hot cocoa with extra marshmallows and extra whipped cream, just the way I liked it. His big frame settled beside me like a shield, his presence calming me.
For a while, it worked. I colored in messy lines and giggled when Butter tried to steal a crayon. Pappa praised every little scribble, telling me how clever I was and how proud he was that I was his. My chest swelled with the kind of love I’d always chased.
But then… it happened.
The red crayon in my hand caught the light, and suddenly it wasn’t wax anymore. It was blood—dark, wet, dripping.
My breath stuttered, and the crayon rolled from my hand. My vision blurred, and before I knew it, I was shaking so hard that I couldn’t stop.
“No, no, no—” The words tumbled out, a broken whisper. “I don’t wanna see it, I don’t wanna, I don’t—”
Pappa was on me instantly, his arms wrapping around me tightly, his voice low and steady against my ear. “Shh, lille prinsen. Everything’s okay. I’ve got you. You have nothing to worry about.”
I buried my face in his chest, but that only made it worse because his smell, his strength—it was from the same man I’d seen with a knife last night.
“I don’t wanna remember,” I sobbed. “Please, Pappa, make it stop.”
His hand cupped the back of my head, rocking me gently, like he could cradle me small enough that the memories wouldn’t reach me. “Oh, baby. What’s wrong? Please, tell me what’s wrong. Pappa will fix it. Just stay with me, little one. Just stay right here.”
I wanted to believe him. I wanted to stay here forever, in the circle of his arms, where everything was so simple. But no matter how tightly he held me, the image wouldn’t let go.
“What—what happened to Bryan, Pappa?” I asked softly, silently begging him to say anything other than what I felt in my heart had happened.
Pappa stilled, an unfamiliar panicked look on his face. He quickly schooled his expression, but I’d already seen it. And it had said so much.
“Tell me you let him go, Pappa, please,” I cried, my chest feeling on the verge of collapse. “You—you just beat him up a bit and then sent him home.”
“Baby…”
“Please, Pappa,” I whispered again, the words cutting into me like they were made of glass.
His arms tightened around me. He didn’t speak at first, and that silence was worse than any answer. My heart pounded so hard I thought it would crack my ribs.
Finally, he sighed, low and heavy against the top of my head. His voice was quiet when it came, steady but weighted with something that made my stomach turn.
“He’s gone.”
The floor seemed to drop out from under me.
“Gone as in he’s not in the shed…? Like—like he’s on a bus somewhere or… or…”
“No, baby.”
I clutched at his shirt like I was falling, my chest hollowing with a sharp, suffocating ache. “No—no, no, no—” The sobs ripped up before I could stop them. “Pappa,why? Why would you—”
He pulled me closer, rocking me even as I shook. “Because he was hurting you, baby. He hurt you, and he would’ve kept hurting you. I couldn’t let that happen. I won’t let anyone hurt you, ever.”
I wanted to believe him. God, I wanted to hold onto that promise, but the words just pained me further. “But—but youkilled him,” I choked out, my tears soaking his chest. “They’ll—they’ll come for you, the police, and they’ll take you away, and I can’t—I can’t lose you, Pappa, I can’t—”
“Hush,” he murmured, firm but soft, his hand rubbing slow circles into my back. “Shhh, my sweet boy. No one is coming. The police won’t take me. Everything is safe. You’re safe, and I’ll never leave you. No one will ever take me away from you, or you from me.”
I shook my head, trembling so hard my teeth ached. “But they always find out—they’ll know—you’ll be gone—I can’t—I need you,” I wailed.
His hand cradled my jaw, tilting my tear-streaked face up to his. His eyes were steady, fierce, and burning with conviction. “Listen to me, Colby. I will not be taken from you. What happened is over. It’s finished. And now it’s just us. Only us. I promise you.”
My breath hitched, my vision swimming. I wanted to scream, to beg him to take it back and make it all go away, but all that came out was a broken sob as I collapsed into his chest again. His arms folded around me, gently rubbing my back as if I were a child waking from a nightmare.
“I’m right here,” he whispered into my hair, over and over. “I’ve got you. You’re mine, and I’m yours. Nothing will come between us. Pappa’s never letting you go.”
