Page 29 of All We Thought We Knew
“I can’t think of anything. What takes you to town in this weather?”
“The furnace is out in the cabin. I’m hoping to find parts at the hardware store, but the contraption is ancient. I may be out of luck.”
“I don’t suppose anyone has used it since Granny passed on.”
“Probably not. I didn’t need a heater when I first moved in.” He downed the last of the coffee and went to rinse the cup then turned to me. “You sure there’s nothing I can get for you?”
“Thanks, but I’ll probably go into town myself next week.” I paused, wondering if I should share my thoughts about Mama’s prognosis with him. Last night I’d seen how considerate Nash was to Mama, and she’d treated him like family. Surely he would agree with me about the need to try everything within our power to save her.
“I’m thinking about going to talk to Dr. Monahan. About Mama.”
He gave a slow nod. “That’s probably a good idea.”
His favorable response pleased me. “I’m convinced more can be done. I want him to give me the name of a doctor we can take her to see in Nashville. A specialist in Mama’s type of cancer.”
He rubbed his chin. “Mattie, I don’t know the details, but Doc discussed this with your folks after your mom’s surgery revealed the cancer had spread. He doesn’t think chemo would help at this point.”
“Doc Monahan is a family doctor. He treats kids with broken arms and tonsillitis. He isn’t an authority on cancer.”
“That’s true, but he’s been a doctor a long time. I’m sure he’s seen his share of cancer patients. I think he knows more about it than you do.”
Irritation swam through me. “This isn’t about my ego, Nash. This is about my mother. I don’t want to lose her a year after losing my brother.”
His expression softened. “I get that. All I’m saying is, the decision is your mom’s, no one else’s.”
“That’s not good enough for me. And it shouldn’t be good enough for anyone who claims to care about her. Would you just let your mother give up and die?”
His jaw tightened. “I’d respect her wishes, no matter how difficult it might be to do that.”
“Well, that’s where you and I differ. If Mama won’t go see the Nashville doctor, then I’ll go myself and find out what they think.With so many advances in medicine these days, it’s foolish not to seek out every possible cure.”
“I think your mom would tell you life and death are in God’s hands, not in medical advancements.”
I narrowed my gaze on him. “I never thought of you as a religious person.”
“I’m not, but I admit I envy your mom’s faith. I’ve never seen anything like it. But as for me, I have a hard time believing in a God who allows so much suffering in the world.”
“For once we agree on something. Maybe you’ll come around to my side after I talk to the doctors.”
He held my gaze for a long moment. “I hope you get the answers you’re looking for. Your parents have been real good to me. I’d never wish anything bad for them.”
He whistled for Jake, who’d wandered into the living room while we talked, and I watched the two of them leave the house. Nash wasn’t an ally yet, but once I had more information from knowledgeable medical professionals, I felt certain he’d see I was right.
I went upstairs and found Mama bundled in a hand-knit afghan, reading.
“It feels like it’s getting colder outside.” She glanced out the window. “I wish I could help get the horses settled in the barn. There’s always so much to do when a storm is coming. I’m glad your father has Nash to help him.”
“Nash had to go to town. The furnace is out in the cabin. He went to find parts.”
Concern filled her eyes. “I hope he isn’t gone long. Your father will need help before the snow gets here.”
I hated for her to worry. “I guess I could go see if there’s anything I can do.” The idea didn’t thrill me, but if it made her feel better, I’d make the sacrifice.
“I know your father would appreciate that, dear.” A sweet smile replaced the frown.
Mama was dozing by the time I changed from my hippie clothes into some of the winter things I’d left in my closet and made my way to the horse barn in a bitter wind. With temperatures quickly plummeting, the stalls that were empty only yesterday now held animals in need of care. Some of the horses were left out to pasture, but they were usually the younger ones, with no health concerns, and could withstand the cold better than some of the older animals.
Moonlight poked her nose over the half door to her stall when I approached. “Hey, girl.” I rubbed her nose, noticing someone had draped a horse blanket over her. “I guess you’re happy to be one of the lucky ones to come in out of the cold.”
