Page 61 of Ash
“Yes, yes, mama, enough,” Zora’s calm voice says. Her voice is rich like Stevie’s, though she too holds a Croatian accent, just not as thick as Nika’s. Zora is in her fifties with salt and pepper hair tied back in a bun, Stevie’s blue eyes and a similar figure. Zora spends most of her time in the back baking or wrangling Nika to stop her from scaring the customers off with stories that may or may not be true about her life in Croatia.
Nika stares directly at me, then looks at all the women: Stevie, Janie, Ren, and even Indy have gathered atNuts about Doughto console me and talk about how much shit Ash ain’t, according to Janie.
“Listen to Nika,”
“Maaaa…” Stevie groans, then hisses when Nika smacks her upside the head.
“Stefa, you didn’t listen to Baka. Now see where you are.” I watch Stevie’s gaze fall to her drink before Nika speaks again. “Men good for one thing, and it takes no minutes to get.” Janie snorts into her drink and starts coughing.
“Sorry, Baka,” she says through her fit.
“You need them for babies. After babies, useless. Houseplant is of more use. Better to look at too. You need the house plant chopped? I chop,” she says firmly before spinning on her heel and heading back to the kitchen with Zora.
Janie is the first to break the silence. “If I don’t end up like her when I grow up, I am going to be so disappointed.”
Stevie snorts. “What? Bat shit crazy?”
“Yes…” Janie sighs dreamily.
“She hasn’t really killed twenty-seven men, has she?” I ask, almost afraid of the answer. Stevie shrugs and takes a sip of her drink.
“I have no proof either way, except her stories never change. But I’ve just decided there are certain things that I’ll sleep better at night, not knowing.”
I nod, “Yeah, that’s true.” I hear Indy’s phone go off and she groans before silencing it. “Him?” I ask and Indy nods.
“Sorry.” I shrug. Ash has been blowing us all up all day, trying to get a hold of me. I watch Janie’s phone light up.
“Oh, he must be desperate,” Janie snorts and I laugh softly. It’s true though. Janie is not the person you want to call if you wronged someone close to her. I groan and drop my head on the table as she picks up the phone.
“Hello?” she says sweetly. “Oh my God! Ash! How are you?”
“Kill me…” I whine as Indy and Stevie rub my back in sympathy.
“Sunday? Oh! Sunday Sutton! Yeah, I’m familiar with her. Why?” Ren smirks and even though I can’t make out the words, I can hear Ash’s voice getting louder and more frantic.
“Ohhhh, you want to talk to her, well it’s the twenty-first century, surely she has a phone. Uh huh… Oh dear, she’s not answering! My God! How dare a woman not answer when a man calls upon her!” Janie snickers as she holds the phone from her ear. We can all hear Ash’s muffled shouts through the phone when she does.
“Okay, Okay, seriously,” Janie says in her normal voice. “She won’t answer you? Okay, well, here’s what I would try, and you know it might not work, but have you thought about going and fucking off? Because I feel like–” She looks down at her phone in confusion. “He hung up on me! How rude.”
“You’re an asshole,” Ren laughs as she sips on her tea before looking at me. “How are you, babe, like seriously?”
I let out a breath. “Like I’d rather be reliving the worst parts of my life rather than dealing with this. My heart is broken. Wade is broken. And the worst part is, it’s not his fault. It’s mine. I knew what I was getting into with this. He told me, and I stupidly thought I could change him. I thought maybe he would want those things if he met the right woman. And… maybe he will, but apparently, I’m not her.” I clear my throat to stop yet another sob session from starting. Fuck, I didn’t even cry this much giving birth.
“He does care about you,” Indy says softly while patting my arm. “You and Wade mean so much to him. He’s just scared.”
“I know, and part of me understands that. But what if I go back, and in a year he gets scared and bolts? What if I end up pregnant and it’s too much for him?”
“I can’t see him doing that… right, Indy?” Stevie asks and I shrug.
“Well, after what I just went through, I don’t see him falling to his knees and kissing my stomach like Atlas. I’m just… I’m so tired of stupidly believing men when they say they want my responsibilities and then I get hurt when they realize it’s too much for them.”
Ren sighs softly. “Relationships take work, girl. Especially ones with people carrying baggage.”
“Wade isn’t baggage,” I snap, and Indy grabs my forearm.
“Sunday, she’s talking about Ash, not you.” I furrow my brows, and stare at my brown-eyed friend.
“Sunday, Ash has called Atlas every single day I’ve been with that man. Atlas said when they lived together, Ash would confide in him a lot. Ash’s dad and ex did a number on him. It’s not an excuse, but it could be that you triggered his anxiety, and I’m sure we can all agree that during an anxiety attack, sometimes our words get fucked up. I’m not saying forgive him, run back, and get married. I’m just saying that Ash has demons that he’s kept locked away because he was busy supporting others and maybe being with him will require a little more patience and understanding.”
