Page 3 of Ash
“I’m heading to work. Stevie will walk you to school, okay?” Wade rolls his eyes.
“Mom, I’m not a baby. I can walk there by myself.”
“I know, but it would make me feel better if you had company. Do you have your homework? Lunch? Snack? Janie will be picking you up if the meeting goes too long.”
“Yes,” Wade sighs. “I have a peanut butter sandwich, the English report, and I will be at the stop waiting for her.”All he had was a sandwich?I sigh and look at my bag of danishes before slipping them into his bag and kissing his head one more time.
“I love you so much. It’s disgusting, you know that, right?” I smile at his typical groan and,“Mom, you are so gross,”before waving one last time and heading out to the bus stop.
* * *
“Hey girl,”I smile at my one of my other best friends, Renas I walk up to the front of my studio.
“I’m not alive yet.” She groans as she rests her head on my shoulder while I unlock the front door.
“Well, get there. I need you bright-eyed and bushy-tailed for this meeting. You should be happy! Soon, I will never have to ask you to teach the Silver Stilettos class again!” I watch Ren’s face fall and have to bite back a laugh.
“You do realize that you making me teach that class nearly cost us our friendship?” I roll my eyes at her dramatics.
“I nevermadeyou. You worked here, and I was having break through seizures. You volunteered, and they loved you so much I had to keep you doing it!” I say as we walk into the studio for what will be the last time. I expect to feel some sense of happiness, but I don’t. Instead, I’m full of a queasy feeling. I’ve been on my own for a long time, having to find my way and listen to my gut. And right now, she’s telling me that something is wrong.
Ren’s grumbling pulls me back out of my thoughts, and I look at my blonde friend. “The last time you guilted me into doing that class, Gladys’ husband, George, pulled me aside after class and told me, in great detail, how that class has changed their sex lives.”
“See! You’ve been out there helping to strengthen relationships!” I smile as I sit in my desk chair and prop my legs up on the desk.
“George is ninety-four!” Ren hisses and I have to admit, that’s not a comfortable visual.
“You’re telling me that when Atlas is ninety-four, you won’t be spinning your curvy ass around a pole for him?” Ren rolls her brown eyes and shakes her head.
“Atlas will be dead by then. He and Amelia are going skydiving today, so I’m waiting on a phone call to identify what is left of their bodies.” My face softens at the mention of Atlas’ sister. According to what Ren has said, Amelia and Atlas had a toxic relationship while growing up and it only got worse while Amelia was deep in her drug addiction, along with their mother. But Amelia got clean a little while back, and Atlas has been trying to slowly bring her back into their lives.
“How is she?” I ask and Ren shrugs, obviously still not sold on Amelia.
“She’s sober. She’s going to meetings, passing drug tests, going to therapy, and following the rules in the sober living house she’s in. She doesn’t ask At for money or much of anything, actually. She goes with me and Atlas every week to the nursing home and she’s been volunteering at an animal shelter across town. I just hope she sticks with it. You know how At is. He loves with his whole heart, and it will destroy him if she does anything to break his trust again. He wants so badly to believe that she has changed.”
I nod as I fire up my computer. “True, but give her the benefit of the doubt, you know? If she’s trying, that is hard work and shouldn’t be looked over and Atlas deserves a big sister, not that you aren’t enough.”
“Shut up and get your shit ready. I’ll let you know when the people are here,” she mutters while heading out the door.
I lean back in my chair as Ren walks out and I’m filled with that sick feeling again. I stare at my computer screen, glancing at the emails. An appointment reminder with my doctor is at the top of the email list. I have an appointment to schedule my surgery at the end of the week. Something else I don’t have time for.
I let out a tired sigh while running my hands through my hair. My epilepsy issues are nothing new. I’ve had seizures since I was about eleven. I’ve gone through all the drug studies, tried everything, but no cocktail of medication would ever get me seizure-free for more than a couple months. But when I got the VNS, a vagal nerve stimulator, I stupidly thought that it would be the answer to my prayers. I would be able to get a driver’s license. My son wouldn’t have to worry about leaving me alone, hellIwouldn’t have to worry about being alone. But it didn’t help. We tried and tried, and the seizures were still so frequent, so it wasn’t feasible to continue, and now I’m having the device removed. For now, it is turned off and I’m in the first month of the hell that is my medication adjustments. It’s a crapshoot, really. Increase this, decrease that, mix this, don’t mix that. And we continued doing it more and more until I found a dose that minimizes the seizures but doesn’t leave me with tons of side effects. Like my current ones, brain fog and insomnia.
I look at my computer and pull up the search engine. I need to find myself and Wade a new place to stay until I can get this place sold and get everything ready down in Alabama. Right now, I’m looking at six months before he and I should have enough to get a house and pay to have our stuff shipped there. Though having to find a new apartment is going to cut into savings, meaning that it might take eight months depending on the place I find.
* * *
I smileas my redheaded friend, Janie, hands me a plastic cup filled with champagne while we sit in her tattoo shop, Hel’s Ink. I look around the room. Janie is sitting on the lap of her fiancé, Fox, the lead artist and co-owner of the shop. Ren is batting away her husband, Atlas’ hand as he goes to grab her ass. Atlas gives her a sheepish grin before sneaking a squeeze. My boy, Wade, sits next to me, though he won’t stop staring at the break room where I know the guys have anXBOX set up.
“Fine,” I give in and motion to the room. “But Derek is back there, so you best be respectful and don’t piss him off.” Wade grins and bolts out of the room, nearly hitting someone walking in from the back. The figure walks out and… oh fuck.
I spin away on my chair before downing my champagne in one very long gulp.
“Hey,” Ash smiles at everyone as he hops onto his table. “What’s everyone doing? Is this some weird intervention?”
Janie rolls her blue eyes. Before gesturing to Stevie, who was setting up the food table. “Right, because cake and pizza are key for any good intervention.”
Ash shrugs, “I dunno I would probably be less mad about being ganged up on if cake from Stevie was involved.”
