Page 56 of My Husband's Wife
‘I leaned on a curling iron at work and I’m just emotional, that’s all.’
‘Is it the move?’
Camille knows which buttons to push. Madison is trying hard to convince herself that she wants the move as much as Theo because she wants him to be happy, but she’s slowly waking up to the fact that their relationship doesn’t feel right. She can’t back out of their wedding, not now. It’s too late. ‘No, I’m just so happy. I have Emily and I never thought…’
‘You have her and look at her; she’s amazing, just like her mum.’
The woman walks back in with their teas and places the cups on the table. ‘It’s lovely to see you, Madison, and I can’t imagine how stressful this must be for you getting a dress at such short notice. I have the one you chose in two sizes. Are you ready to try them on?’
‘Go do this, sis,’ Camille says.
Heading behind the curtain alone, she pulls her loose top over her head and steps out of her baggy jeans. The dress is smooth as it glides over straight into place. ‘Can you do it up for me?’
Camille comes in and pulls the zip up. ‘It’s too big. You’ve lost weight.’ Camille steps back to take in Madison’s tiny arms and hollow clavicles.
‘I’m here to get it adjusted. It’ll be okay.’ Madison knows that her new slighter figure, matched with the burn and the sallow-looking skin on her face, is telling a story right now. Camille can’t stop staring. ‘I’ve just been busy with Emily. All that running around you do with them… I barely get chance to finish a cuppa.’
‘Are you eating?’ Camille has her judgemental face on again. It’s like when they were teens and Madison stopped eating for a while when she started secondary school and the bullies migrated her way. Food has always made her nauseous when she is on edge. It wasn’t an eating disorder, as her parents and sister had suspected; it was her own personal anxiety.
‘I’m just busy, that’s all. I’ll be better when the wedding is over and Emily stops waking me up all night.’
‘It’s like Theo’s constant worrying is wearing off on you. You need to look after yourself for Emily. She needs her mum to be healthy.’
‘I am healthy.’ She slips out of the dress, her tiny stomach displaying its faded stretchmarks. She places a hand over it, not wanting her sister to focus on what she perceives as her flaws rather than a reminder of how she got her lovely daughter. ‘Can you just ask Elisse to come in here and spare me the lecture?’
Camille storms out through the curtain. Madison stares at her figure in the mirror. She wants to eat but she’s anxious. Camille is right: Theo and his moods are making her anxious. But she loves him. When he’s sweet, he’s amazing, and they connected again the other night and it felt so good. He gave her the baby she’d always wanted and he’s a good dad. Her mind whirls with the ring, the raven toy, the photo of the babies and the photo of the boy, and the things he’s hidden from her and things he is still hiding from her. His reaction to her going into his shed had been a shock that she is only now feeling the impact of.
Elisse enters. ‘I’ll get it adjusted ASAP for you, love.’ She’s all smiles with no judgement as she pins the dress and helps Madison out of it before leaving again.
‘Camille?’
‘What?’
‘I’m sorry. You’re right. I am anxious at the moment. I’m about to get married, then I’m moving to Scotland and I’ll miss you and the kids.’ By now she’s crying and she can’t stop it. ‘It churns in my stomach day and night, and I can’t eat properly because I feel sick all the time.’ She slides down the mirror, onto the floor.
Camille comes in and sits next to her, hugging her closely. ‘Sis, please don’t go. Don’t leave us. I have a bad feeling about all this and I can’t shake it off. I’m sorry if that upsets you to hear but you’re my sister and I’d hate it if I sat back and said nothing. This doesn’t feel right.’
She cries into her sister’s top, letting it all out and wondering what she should and shouldn’t say. Camille is right. She doesn’t want to leave. What Theo said about Camille sending that horrible message to stop her from leaving wasn’t true. He was trying to sabotage her relationship with her sister, and maybe he was trying to isolate her. No, no, no – that was her old relationship. Theo isn’t trying to isolate her or gaslight her. He needs the move for his own reasons. How could she have allowed her thoughts to go there? She doesn’t know what to think, but she can put the brakes on for a while, to give her time to think. She loves Theo and she wants to marry him. He’s unwell, not manipulative, but she needs to step up and say what she wants. It’s not all about him.
It isn’t too late to keep her salon and her life. Theo just needs to be convinced.
Forty-Seven
Madison checks her list.
Cake – tick.
Hair and make-up – tick – Orla is doing it all.
Dress – tick – Orla has collected it. It’s still slightly loose but it’ll be fine.
Camille’s dress – tick – gorgeous.
The bridesmaid and pageboy outfits for Francesca and Eden – tick.
Emily’s dress – tick – super cute.
Rings, groom’s suit, flowers, celebrant, food and drinks, photographer – tick.
