Page 53 of My Husband's Wife
He looks at her for a few seconds and she wonders if he’s trying to weigh up how much she’d heard, then his features soften. ‘Yes, my mother called again. I think I’m going to have to block her. She’s drunk and full of self-pity, and she’s blaming me again. It was her fault Emily died, not mine. She could have tried to save Emily and let me die.’
Her doubts start to dissipate. Of course his mother is real. His words stick in her mind as she can’t help thinking of their Emily, not his sister. If our baby had died I’d be distraught. Maybe I’d turn to drink and be full of bitterness, rage and hate. ‘She lost a child, Theo, and she obviously has a drinking problem. Maybe you, or we, should be a bit more understanding.’
He pulls her close again. ‘You’re such a good person, you know that? You’re right. I should be more understanding. I’m so over what I’ve been through since she let me rot in the system because she couldn’t cope, but she’s living in the past and her calling me like this isn’t on.’
She strokes his hair, knowing that Theo is far from over his past. It has always been hard for her to imagine how having an unhappy childhood could affect a person so badly. ‘She’s still your mother and whatever she said on the phone, she’ll probably regret it tomorrow.’
Buster barks and scratches at the back door. Madison opens it and he darts out into the darkness, probably vexed by a fox that dared to encroach on his territory.
‘You’re right.’ He pulls a curly hair from her face and tilts his head.
Emily sleeps soundly now, and Buster is no longer yapping in the background.
‘Where were we?’
She remembers exactly where they were and she thinks they need to feel close again. She needs to believe that he’s telling the truth and that the messenger is just Eva thinking that Theo is her dead husband. The woman is delusional, and Madison should feel sorry for her.
Taking his hand, she leads him upstairs and tears his T-shirt over his head. In her haste, she scrapes his skin and he yelps but that doesn’t stop him. Nothing will stop either of them now. All their pent-up tension comes out as he touches her, kisses her and finally enters her. Every touch is exactly where it needs to be for her, but with Theo, it always was, and she’s reminded why she could never get enough of him. She’s missed this and she knows he has too. Her body hasn’t popped out of place or bust into a mess as she’d feared.
After minutes of writhing on their messy bed, they lie there, spent and both grateful that Emily isn’t awake.
Buster barks at the back door to come in.
‘I’ll go,’ Theo says as he reaches for his track bottoms and pulls them on.
She’d forgotten what he looked like naked. Yes, it has only been a few months but she’d missed his toned thighs and his strong arms.
The dog patters up the stairs and almost jumps on her in bed. She grabs her nursing nightdress and pulls it back over her head before stroking Buster. ‘Did you catch that fox, Buster boy?’
He goes to lick her face but she blocks his tongue with her arm. He jumps off the bed and stares at the corner of the room. She tries to see what he’s looking at but it’s just her shadow on the back wall. He begins to hack and baulk. ‘Buster.’
She jumps out of bed to catch him spewing up a pile of beige goo with a cherry red coloured streak in it. ‘What on earth have you been eating out there?’
He whines and comes over to her for some love. She smells something buttery. There is a smear of grease up his snout. She leaves the room to get something to clean the mess up with. That’s when she sees through the window of the spare bedroom and shivers. The front gate is open. When she’d been standing there earlier, when they’d come close to making love on her desk, that gate had been closed. The thought that someone has been watching them makes her feel sick. ‘Theo,’ she yells.
He hurries up with a couple of glasses of juice and a big smile on his face. ‘Thought you might want a drink.’
‘Theo, that gate was closed earlier and now it’s open. Someone has been here, in our garden, maybe in our house, while we were…’
Forty-Four
Madison inhales the fresh morning air at the front door while trying to work out how the gate could have opened. It’s too old and stiff to blow open in a breeze. Once again, Theo had put the fact that she had felt watched down to her being forgetful or postnatal, and that she probably left the gate open. The way Buster darted out last night had convinced her even more that someone had been there, and why did he return with butter on his face? The scent of veggie sausages wafts under her nose but her nerves are jangling.
‘I’ve made you breakfast.’ Theo stands behind her in the cartoon owl apron she bought him for Christmas. He teases her tangled curls away from her shoulders and kisses her neck. She doesn’t even remotely feel the tingle of last night that left her overcome with desire. It’s like that button has been switched off, along with her sense of security in this house.
She closes the front door and ambles to the kitchen, wondering if she should have showered first. Like most mornings when she doesn’t go to the salon, she feels grotty. Her slippers, leggings and maternity top have become her home uniform, and they are becoming too comfortable.
‘I’ve fed Emily and she’s asleep so make the most of this,’ he says.
The sandwich is huge. She sits and begins to nibble the edges, trying hard to stop worrying and further making her stomach churn. ‘I think making the most of it will mean me putting my feet up.’
‘You should. I might head to the cabin. I have a few enquiries to deal with.’ He grabs the other half of his sandwich and leaves her alone with her thoughts.
Buster lays his head in her lap under the table, remaining hopeful that she’ll throw him some food. She drops a whole sausage into his mouth and he darts away with it.
She leaves the table and heads upstairs. As she enters Emily’s bedroom, she hears gurgling. Her baby wriggles in her cot, her little legs outstretched, pushing all her blankets off her.
‘Morning, sunshine. It looks like you’re starting to teethe.’ She strokes Emily’s red-cheeked face, then Emily pops her knuckle in her mouth. ‘Shall we go for a little walk?’ She puts the baby sling on and places Emily in it.
