Page 14 of Midnight & Magic
“N, no.” Cassidy managed to suck the word out between shallow breaths as her head nuzzled into his chest. He smelled like bergamot and sandalwood. Damn him!
“Okay. How about we switch rooms? Would you like that?”
She pulled away from him and nodded in between some more hard breaths.
“I’m gonna carry you if that’s alright.”
“Y, yes.”
He lifted her into his arms and took her down the long hallway. It led them to an area that smelled of chlorine. As he led her into the vast room that housed an Infinity Pool, Cassidy heard the sound of falling water from a built-in waterfall towards the far end of the pool.
“This is my favorite room in the house, and it’s the main reason I force myself to spend time in my penthouse as often as possible. I probably would be sleeping at the office if I didn’t have this.” He said as he lowered her onto a barker lounge. “I hope the sound of the waterfall helps to calm you. I’ll be right back because I’m going to get us some water.”
He vanished again, giving Cassidy time to focus on her breathing. She hated these attacks. They came on fast and more frequently this past year because of the divorce. And also because she had been caring for her mother, who had stage 4 cancer. Every time the phone rang, she headed straight to panic mode, thinking the hospital staff was on the other end. Of course, the hospital doesn’t call anymore, not after her mother passed away about 6 months ago, and it was still tough to believe she was gone. But the hardest thing seemed to be about how she felt rather than the actual death.
On the one hand, a sense of relief washed over her now that her mother was no longer in pain and was at peace. On the other, she built up an enormous guilt trip about that relief. Preservation of life is a strange thing. You do so much to keep yourself alive by eating healthy, exercising, and even doing something as simple as meditating. Still, when you get sick—all bets are off. Towards the end, her mom simply wanted to go, and Cassidy didn’t blame her.
The main stem of the panic attacks spawned from the constant “fight or flight” she felt taking care of her mother. But the divorce didn’t help, either. Especially when Eric turned to the public and made Cassidy out to be a cold-hearted bitch that was more concerned with saving her mother than making a marriage work. She didn’t understand how he could take something so natural as caring for your aging/elderly parents and make it seem twisted and fucked up to want to do that. Society was definitely changing, but Cassidy noticed it was for the worst.
Her breathing slowed to a steady and relaxing speed as Camden came in with two water bottles and handed one over to her.
“Here.”
“Thanks.” She said with a smile and opened up the bottle. “You seem to be a natural at knowing what to say when someone has a panic attack.”
“My sister used to get them. And I used to as well. They are not fun by any stretch of the means.”
“No, they aren’t.”
“How long have you been getting them?” Camden asked as he brushed a few stray strands from her face and tucked them behind her ear.
“For about 6 months now. They started about a week after my mom died.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. But I understand it. Mine stemmed from a similar situation. Both of our parents died in a car crash. My sister was still a fledgling. I stopped everything in my life to take care of her and even saw her off to college. All while maintaining my business. It’s been a long road, but we are both getting better. She’s a lawyer now. Made partner last year and has a great husband.” He shrugged before continuing. “Since we are pureblooded vampires, theirs a chance for us to have children. At least—that’s the theory given that Alec’s fiancee is pregnant.”
“Yeah. It surprised me to hear about it. But I’m sorry for your loss, too.”
“Thanks.” He said as he took a sip of water before continuing. “Listen, I think you should stay here tonight.”
“Cam, that’s not a good idea.”
“I have a guest room, and you are welcome to it. Please, I’d feel so much better if you were here because I hate seeing anyone go through those alone. I’ll be down the hall from you if you need anything.”
She found it hard to argue with him because her attacks have, sometimes, taken on a life of their own. But she couldn’t help but blurt out a joke about the whole thing because of her nerves.
“Is that an order, boss?”
His brows narrowed as his lips turned downward.
“If that’s what you need to hear to stay, then yes, it’s an order.”
“I’m sorry. It’s not like that. I make stupid jokes when I’m nervous.”
“I understand.” He said, his face softening. “Let me get one of my tee shirts for you, so you are more comfortable sleeping. I’ll set the alarm for 7. We have a date with my personal shopper at 7:30, so you can have a change of clothes. And then we can head into the office for 9.”
“But isn’t that a late day for you? You just told me this morning that you wanted me in the office before the sun was even up. And—” Her mouth went dry, and her breathing began to shallow again.
He pulled her into his arms and kissed the top of her head.
