Page 21 of Keep My Heart
‘You don’t want to get married again?’
‘Not if it’s going to be like it was with Chris. I don’t want to bein that kind of relationship ever again. We didn’t even like spending time together.’
‘You were with the wrong guy. When you find the right one, everything will be different.’
As she stops at a light, my phone rings. It’s my mom. I texted her when I got off the plane to let her know I was here. She’s volunteering at her church tonight for a spaghetti dinner fundraising event. That’s why I was planning to have dinner with Diane.
‘Hey, Mom,’ I answer. ‘Are you at the church?’
‘Yes, we just started serving. How was your trip?’
‘Good. I slept through most of the flight.’
‘Are you at Diane’s house?’
‘Um, yeah,’ I lie, not wanting to tell her I’m going to Matt’s house. She’d want to know why and I don’t want to tell her. I love my mom, but she feels the need to give me advice about everything so it’s best if I don’t tell her stuff. ‘We just started making dinner.’
‘What time do you think you’ll be home?’
‘I’m not sure.’ I glance at Diane. ‘It might be kind of late. Diane and Tom want to play cards after the kids go to bed.’
‘Okay, well, if it’s after ten, just let yourself in.’
‘I will. Bye, Mom!’ I end the call and put my phone away.
‘You might be out late?’ Diane says, smiling at me. ‘How late are we talking? Two, three in the morning? I’m guessing this means you and Nick are going out after dinner.’
I roll my eyes. ‘That’s not what I meant. I just didn’t want her expecting me to be home early.’
‘Why didn’t you tell her you’re having dinner with Nick?’
‘Seriously? You know my mom. If she knew I was hanging out with a guy a day after my divorce she’d tell me it’s too soon and that I should wait at least a year before dating again.’
‘A year?’ Diane says like I’m crazy. ‘How are you supposed togive her grandkids if you wait a year to start dating again? You’re not getting any younger.’
I laugh. ‘Thanks. I didn’t know 33 was that old.’
‘It’s not, but you know what I mean. By the time you meet someone, get engaged, and get married, you could be almost 40, especially if you wait a year to start dating.’
I’m dreading dating again, starting over from scratch. I’m not sure I even rememberhowto date. I was with Chris since high school, except for a few months when we were 20 and not sure we wanted to get married. We both tried dating other people during those months and all I remember is that I didn’t like it. The dates always felt awkward and I never felt any kind of connection with the guy. I think that’s why I went back to Chris. He was my safe place, because he was familiar and reminded me of home. We were living in California and I missed my family and Haydon Falls. Chris was the closest thing I had to home without actually being there.
‘I made so many mistakes,’ I say.
‘What do you mean?’ Diane asks with concern.
‘Marrying Chris. Moving to LA. Not going to college.’
‘You went to college.’
‘Community college, and I went when I was 26. I missed out on going to college when everyone else did and living on campus.’
‘It wasn’t that great. Just a lot of getting drunk at parties and feeling like crap the next day.’
I smile at her. ‘You loved college. You met Tom there. But it’s sweet of you to try to make it sound horrible for my sake.’
‘I’m just saying, it’s not as great as they make it look in the movies.’ She slows down as we approach a sharp curve on a road that’s surrounded by trees. It’s such a beautiful area. Sometimes I really miss my hometown.
‘Why don’t you move back?’ Diane asks, like she was readingmy mind. ‘Your mom’s here. You have friends here. And there’s no chance of you running into Chris now that his parents moved to Florida.’
