Page 57 of Afterglow
Our noses graze as I deepen the kiss. I clasp my hands tighter around his neck. Theo groans, allowing me to slip my tongue into his mouth. The sensations are endless—with every brush of our lips, desperation crawls up my spine.
I am intoxicated by Theodore Knight and I never want it to end. He takes control from me, pushing me backwards into the kitchen bench. Theo moves his hand to my hair, fisting and tugging on it.
The possessive undertone of the kiss doesn't escape me. And fuck, I love it. Theo pulls away, a small whine leaving my throat.
A smile plastered on his face. “I want to take you on a date,” he said quickly.
I laugh. I just kissed him and Theo is still nervous. “Sure,” My eyes light up. “You have a bye this weekend, right?”
“Yeah, but how do you—”
“That’s not important. Do you want to come to Jayden and Willow’s ice hockey game with me?”
Theo smiles. “Yeah, Princess. I would love to, but don’t think I’m forgetting that other statement. Since when do you know my schedule?” He teases.
I feel my cheeks heat. So, I stalked him a little, it’s not a big deal. “I may have looked it up,” Theo’s smile becomes even brighter. “Purely for educational purposes,”
“Mmm,” he mumbles, leaning down and burying his face in my neck. “Whatever you say Princess.”
I inhale Theo’s spicy cologne as I hold him tighter, pressing our bodies together. The warmth embrace melts the tension from my shoulders and scatters my thoughts.
Touching someone has never been my preferred way to receive comfort and affection. But with Theo, I want his hands grazing my skin during the day and night even in small meaningless moments.
Theo and I remain where we are, unmoving and at peace. For once, my brain is quiet and my desire to control everything has dissolved. Relief washes over me. It's unfamiliar but I welcome it.
“Are you okay, Princess?”
I pull back, looking into Theo’s soft gaze. My fingers are locked together behind his neck, while Theo runs the tips of his fingers along my waist. The circular pattern his fingers draw is another layer of comfort. I want to stay like this forever.
“Yeah, I’m—” I stop myself.
I’m not fine. If I am honest with myself, I haven’t beenfinefor a long time. But that four-letter word easily slips off my tongue, compared to the word vomit that would leave if I didn’t feel the need to lie.
Theo deserves the truth.
“No, I’m not fine.” I swallow and take a deep breath. “I’ve struggled with anxiety and insomnia since I was thirteen years old. Turns out having caffeine that young wasn’t a good idea,” the deprecating tone coats my words.
Theo wipes away a stray tear that falls down my face. “It’s okay. Take your time,”
“I just wanted to be perfect,” my voice breaks, a sob escaping my throat. “Jayden and my parents didn’t even have to try. They are perfect but I had to try, try and try. Even if it meant losing myself along the way.”
Theo’s arms wrap around me again. I didn’t think it was possible to be closer to him but here we are. Theo presses chaste kisses into my neck, before pulling back. Intense fog of emotions cloud his blue eyes as they never stray from mine.
“No one is perfect, Jazmine. And I like you the way you are: strong, stubborn and passionate—it oozes from your fingertips and infects everyone you touch. It doesn’t matter if you see yourself as imperfect, I’ll be there to remind you who you really are.”
Fuck. My heart melts and there’s nothing I can do about it. Theodore Knight will be my favourite person. To some extent, he already is. My vision is blurry from his heartfelt proclamation, rivulets staining my cheeks.
“I think I should go back to my psychologist,” I manage to say through my sobbing.
Theo tilts his head, confusion written into his features. “Did you stop going?”
I look to the floor, unable to meet his worried eyes. “I cancelled some of my appointments earlier in the semester because I thought I had everything under control. Then I was so busy with assessments and studying I didn’t have time for an appointment and—”
Theo interrupts. “Take a deep breath, Princess.”
He tilts my chin up. Inhale. Exhale. I repeat the process, Theo nodding as I do it. “That’s it. Good girl,”
My cheeks flame. Apparently, my need for validation has turned into a praise kink. Theo knows it too. He brushes his thumb over my cheek and my eyes flutter shut at his soft touch.
