Page 53 of Afterglow
“Jealous looks good on you Princess,”
Her face crinkled. “I’m not jealous,”
I scoff. Yeah, right. “Look me in the eyes and say it,”
Jazmine snaps her attention back to me. "Fuck off. I don't need this. Bye, Theodore.”
And just like that, I’m back to square one.
Chapter 24
Jazmine Allen
Iwas not jealous.
I’ve repeated those words too many times since Sunday night. When I arrived home from the party, I wanted to strangle Theodore and myself.
Why did I let myself get this deep? I’ve been able to suppress my attraction and emotions for Theodore but after Sunday I didn’t want to do that anymore. I was willing to lose myself in him, to follow Theodore into a relationship if that's what hewanted.
But seeing him with another girl was a punch in the gut. I threw myself into assessments and studying, hoping it would distract me from thinking about Theo. It worked for twenty-four hours until I had to see him in class. Monday was my first-time seeing Knight since the party. It’s safe to say it was fucking tense.
I reach my lecture theatre and find Theodore sitting in the seat next to mine—this is how it always goes. I remind myself to breathe and power ahead to my chair.
Theodore snaps his head towards me when I sit. He looks confused, as if he can’t believe I’m sitting next to me. If Theodore thought I wouldn’t remain a professional in classes with him, he had another thing coming. I could keep my emotions in check, usually I push them all the back of my mind and forget they exist.
So, that is exactly what I do.
The class is a struggle. The tension is blatantly obvious like one comment would spark a fire. My hand shakes as I take notes and out the corner of my eye Theodore can’t stop staring.
“Are you—”
I stopped him. “I’m fine.” The snarl in my voice is clear.
He doesn’t talk to me again.
Our research project is due in a month. Time is running out which is making me nervous. One thing I hate about group projects is relying on other people. That probably sounds insane, but needing people to pull their weight and participate drives me up the walls.
Theo has—and I reluctantly admit this—been great. Once we decided on our idea, he contacted some playersfrom his team that have either had injuries in the past or are currently recovering. We have set up interviews tomorrow to give us enough time to write our paper.
The past few weeks my schedule has become intense. I love Willow but her visiting Lakewood has put a slight spanner into the works. Now, the pressure is building and it is bringing my old habits back to life.
I haven’t been to Dr Gray in three weeks and I can tell from her phone calls she is worried. No one knows I haven’t gone, but Sofia and Athena have been watching me closely. And when I dropped Willow to the airport on Monday, she seemed worried too. She tried to hide it but we’ve been best friends for over ten years, so I can tell what she is thinking.
The last time my friends were this worried I had a panic attack at a party. I don’t want a repeat of that.
Taking a deep breath, I choose a card from beside my bed.
The emotion that can break your heart is sometimes the very one that heals it.
I sigh, frustration escaping the back of my throat. These stupid affirmations are too relevant. Packing my laptop and iPad into my bag, I leave for Theodore’s house.
Before the football game and the party, we decided to meet for an extra day, so the research project was finalised a week in advance. Today was the day we decided on.
The sun is burning above as I exit the house, however, the transition into Fall is evident. The crunch of leavesbelow my feet, the cool breeze that makes me tug my maroon jacket tighter.
I rub my eyes, trying to push away the fatigue I currently feel. Every muscle in my body is heavy and tense. I have lost count of the amount of caffeine I consumed over the past three days as well as the limited hours I slept for. I’m trying to keep going because I have way too many things to do before the weekend.
Rest can come later.
