Page 106 of Toxic Salvation
“I will come and visit, of course. But I can’t stay with you the whole time. My men need me in the city. They need to know that I’m prepared to fight right alongside them. Otherwise, how can they ever trust me? How can they put their faith and their loyalty in a man who won’t risk his own life for theirs?”
“You have a baby on the way,” I protest. “You have Luka. You have me!”
He grabs my face and pulls me toward him. Those green eyes are churning wildly. “They have their own families, too, Vesper. We’re Bratva men. This is part of the risk.”
“I want to stay together, Kovan. I don’t want to be away from you.”
“I don’t want that, either. But I have to think like apakhanfirst and a man second. That is, if I’m going to keep all my people alive.”
“No.”
He leans away from me. “No?”
“No, I’m not going. I’m a doctor!” I point out fiercely. “I should be with you and your men. I hope to God that you won’t need me, but you might.”
“You’re a pediatric surgeon?—”
“Yes, but I can also?—”
“And you’repregnant.”
“I can do my job and still be pregnant,” I cry out. “Isn’t that what I’ve been doing this whole time?”
“That’s different. You’re a doctor in a hospital. It’s a controlled environment.”
“Except when masked gunmen storm the place and start shooting,” I remind him acidly.
“Exactly! BecauseIwas there. Danger has a habit of following me, Ves?—”
“And that’s going to change after the baby is born and Ihor is dealt with?” I interrupt.
He sighs. “Well, there are always going to be threats?—”
“Exactly my point. Are we in this together or are we not?”
He’s shaking his head before I even finish my question. “It doesn’t work like that.”
“You told me that we would be partners in this. You told me that we were equals.”
“That doesn’t mean I’m going to give you a fucking gun and bring you out into the field with me,” he snarls. “You’re being ridiculous.”
“And you’re being stubborn. I’m a resource, Kovan! Use me! If it makes you feel any better, I’m willing to wait until this baby is born. I have no desire to put our child in danger, so I will stay behind your high walls like a good little girl until I deliver. But then?—”
“There’s no ‘but.’ You’re going to do as I say.”
“Are you telling me that you’re going back on your word?” I demand.
“Christ!” Kovan hisses, running his hand through his hair in frustration. “This is about the men who follow me, Vesper! What if something unpredictable were to happen in the field? They wouldn’t just lose me—they’d lose you, too.”
“If I were with you, your chances of surviving would be a whole lot better.”
“Someone certainly thinks highly of her skills.”
I shrug proudly. “I’m a damn good doctor.”
Despite his anger, I notice the spark in his expression as he gives me the once-over. He may not like me mouthing off to him or pushing back the way I do, but he is attracted to my confidence.
I slip my hand into his. “I’m not talking about taking unnecessary risks, Kovan. I’m just saying I think we make a good team.”
