Page 103 of Simmer Down
I will the thought away. At least I can talk to him, at least I could apologize to him face-to-face. And now I can move on.
When I blink this time, no tears fall. “I’m really happy for you and Finn, Callum. I’m glad business is going well for you. It was really good seeing you.”
I turn to walk back to my towel, but then he grabs my hand and I’m on fire. Even though it’s just our palms touching, I feel the flames over every inch of my skin. That delicious warmth I’ve missed somuch, that I’ve ached for every single day. Nothing feels as good. Not sunlight, not my favorite fuzzy blanket, not a warm ocean breeze. Nothing can compete with Callum’s simmering warmth. It is bliss on my skin.
When I look up at Callum, my gaze latches on to those perfect hazel eyes. I couldn’t break this stare if my life depended on it.
“I finally watched your video on Penelope’s Instagram,” Callum says. A swallow moves down his throat. “You love me?”
My breath catches, but I steady myself. “I do. So much. I’m sorry.” I stop before my voice can break.
He looks at me like I’ve started barking instead of speaking. “Sorry for what?”
Pulling my hand out of his is the single hardest physical act I’ve had to complete in recent memory. But I have to. Because Callum isn’t mine. He’s someone else’s. And if he were with me and some other woman confessed her feelings to him, I’d rage. It’s not right what I’m doing, going on like this. I have to stop.
“I’m sorry that I’m doing this, that I’m saying this to you. It’s not right.”
“What do you mean it’s not right?”
I clasp my hands behind my back to ensure I won’t touch him again. “You’re with someone else, Callum. That means I shouldn’t be saying any of this to you.”
When my head droops to the ground, he guides me back to his gaze with his thumb under my chin. “What are you talking about? I’m not with anyone.”
I’m frowning so hard, the muscles in my forehead ache. “But the redhead. I saw you two together.”
“The redhead? What redhead?”
“Yourredhead, Callum. Or ginger—whatever you call redheads.I—okay, listen. This is going to sound so creepy and crazy, but I drove to your condo the other day to try to work things out with you. I ran into Finn at the farmer’s market, and he told me I should go see you and tell you how I feel. So I drove to your condo, but before I could even get out of my car, I saw you walk out the door with that gorgeous woman...”
I stop to catch my breath. Callum’s hand falls from my face to rub his own. I can’t tell if he’s smiling or grimacing. “Oh. Her.”
“Yeah.” My reply is barely audible over the crashing waves. They’re picking up in intensity now that it’s evening.
When he lets out his next breath, he looks relieved. “Nikki, that was Rose. Our cousin. She was visiting us from Scotland.”
“Oh.” The word falls from my lips like a hiccup. “So... you’re not with anyone?”
“I’ve not been with anyone since you, Nikki. I don’t want anyone but you.”
“But... but I thought you were so hurt... I thought you didn’t want me—”
He grabs my hands in his again. Warmth simmers all over me.Home.
“I still wanted you, Nikki. I was just hurt. I needed time. But that didn’t mean I ever stopped loving you.”
“You still love me?”
He nods, pulling me closer by the hands. We’re nearly chest to chest now. I have to tilt my head up just to keep looking at him.
“I’ve been miserable without you. Just ask Finn.” Callum’s chest heaves with a breath. “Last night he got back from a day trip with Grace, sat me down, and asked if I finally watched Penelope’s video. I hadn’t, of course, since I had been working, volunteering, and entertaining our cousin. So he pulled out his phone and played it forme. I was speechless. He said he was sick of me being an insufferable lump and I had no reason to be sad knowing you felt the same way about me, and that I needed to find you and make things right.”
I tear up once more, but this time it’s okay because I’m smiling. “Finn said that?”
“He did.”
He wraps his arms around my waist. “So let’s do this the right way. I want a proper relationship with you out in the open, for everyone to know and see. No more hiding.”
“I want that too. I love you, Callum.”
