Page 17 of Faker
His eyes widen for a second, but then he nods. He’s probably surprised at my offer, seeing as we haven’t spoken more than polite pleasantries to each other since I’ve worked at Nuts & Bolts. But Cal is someone who’s always been kind and respectful to me at work, and I want him to feel comfortable approaching me if he needs help.
“Appreciate it.” He walks back to his lunch.
When I make it back to my desk, I see that Tate’s office is still empty. He must be out on an errand or an appointment orsomething. It’s just as well. I don’t know if I could even muster the courage to look at him right now. Much of the fire and fury inside of me from our argument has melted away, leaving something unfamiliar behind.
I ball both fists in my hair, unsure of what to do or how to feel.
five
So wait, Tate’s been delivering lunch to your elderly coworker? And giving him money?” My little sister, Addy, stares at me through my laptop screen. Her chocolate brown eyes are as big as saucers as I fill her in over Skype about my fight with Tate and creeping on his random act of kindness.
“Yeah. For the past few months now, apparently.”
“Huh.” A confused frown crowds her face. Anything other than a beaming smile appears unnatural on her. She is one of those people whose resting neutral face radiates warmth and friendliness, unlike me. My resting bitch face suffers no fools.
“I feel kind of bad about freaking out on him now.”
I down the last of the green smoothie I made in preparation for this evening’s Skype session with Addy, hoping it would reset my cloudy head. It doesn’t. Excluding his first week of work at Nuts& Bolts, I’ve never felt anything other than negative emotions for Tate. But after seeing him act so kindly to Cal, I’m at a loss. The past few days have been quieter than usual because I don’t know what to say or how to look at him. We got through our latest one-on-one meeting for the charity homebuilding project with quickanswers, minimal questions, and short bouts of eye contact. After ten minutes, it was back to ignoring each other.
“Don’t you dare feel bad,” Addy scolds.
“Maybe my empathy is seriously lacking,” I say, ignoring her comment. “Maybe I’ve been so blinded with rage and irritation that I missed out on little kind things he’s done these past eleven months.”
Addy pins me with a frown. “Your empathy is perfectly intact. Can you honestly think of one instance where he showed kindness to you?”
I open and close my mouth a half dozen times, yet nothing comes.
The empty glass makes a loud clink when I set it on the table. Addy wags her finger at me. “Just because he was kind to someone else doesn’t take away the fact that he was an utter douche nozzle to you. Do you honestly think that he’ll suddenly be nice to you too?”
It actually speaks volumes that he went out of his way to be nice to Cal but can’t seem to show me the slightest bit of courtesy in our everyday interactions. Yes, we’ve maintained a courteous silence lately, but we’re bound to bicker about something soon. We always do. And it’s only a matter of time before he says just the right cutting words to me, leaving me frustrated and hurt.
That knot of annoyance seeps back into the pit of my stomach. “You’re right.”
“He’d better be more professional at least, especially if you have to meet with him every single freaking week for that project.”
“I wouldn’t count on it.” I shake my head, hoping it clears away all remaining thoughts of Tate. “Enough about work. Tell me about Costa Rica.”
“It’s absolutely incredible here. Like, otherworldly.” Addygestures wildly. “Lush green everywhere, crystal blue ocean. I wish you could be here to see it.”
Her olive skin is even tanner than before. That combined with her dark hair makes her pop against the beige and yellow background of the room she’s in.
“Your gifts are being put to good use too!”
She holds up the pink visor I gave her. “Thanks to this, my face stays covered, which means no blemishes or sun spots. Yay for staving off future wrinkles!”
I flash her a thumbs-up. “How are your feet holding up?”
“Amazing! Those gel inserts you gave us make all the difference when we’re walking for hours and hours. You’re seriously the best.”
She mentions how much she loves the translation app I bought for the one phone she and Ryan are sharing during their trip.
“When you get the chance, check your PayPal account,” I say. “I left you a little something.”
Addy’s jaw drops. “Emmie! Come on, you’ve already done enough.”
“I know you saved money for this trip, but you’re still my little sister. It’s my job to look after you. You don’t even have to use it if you don’t want to. Save it for an emergency, just for your peace of mind.”
She crosses her arms, but her beaming smile gives away her delight. Seeing her expressive face and wide smile is a delightful comfort. We haven’t talked since she left for her trip last month, and I’ve been dying to catch up with her.
