Page 125 of Playing A Risk
Why is everything going wrong?
Am I finally getting what I deserve after putting everyone through hell these past few months?
He faces me with red-rimmed eyes. “I swear, Dorothy. I can’t remember anything from when I left the bar to the next morning.”
The impact of the situation crushes me. He’s having a kid with Isabella. Jami’s leaving and let me go for good. Melanie’s moving along with him.
The ground opens up and swallows me whole. I don’t see how my life can be in more turmoil.
“We need some time apart.” I go numb and rise to my feet. “I have to get out of here.”
“No!” He rushes to me and takes hold of my arms. “Please, do not leave. You know I hate it when you run out on me. Please stay and talk to me about this. We’ve been doing well with our communication. I’m not about to let Isabella ruin that for us.”
Just hearing him say her name pierces my heart. “She might not have any say in our communication level, but now she has a lot to say about our lives.”
“Not if we don’t let her.”
My blood heats as my brow furrows. “How is that possible? She’s having your baby.”
His shoulders go rigid. “I don’t know that for sure. She needs to take a paternity test before I accept any responsibility.”
I wiggle out of his grasp and step away from him. “And if the test says this baby is yours?”
“Then nothing changes between you and me. Other than financially, I don’t have to help her or be a part of their lives.”
I tense. My two miscarriages race to my thoughts. Every cell in my body explodes with jealous anger.
I glare in his direction. “You can’t begin to understand how selfish that makes you sound. If you let Isabella raise your child alone because of me, you don’t understand me at all.”
Confusion washes over his face. “Why?”
“There are people out there like me who have gotten pregnant and had their dream of holding their baby in their arms taken from them.
“Hunter, you have a chance to have that, and you want to push it away because of me. No, you don’t get to put that on me. It’s your selfishness that would have you walking away from your responsibilities.”
“Dorothy, you’re confusing me.” He points to the couch. “Can we please sit down and discuss this? Because I’m lost right now.”
“No, I’m not sitting. I don’t see why you’re so confused. You’re having a baby and want to walk away just so I’ll stay with you. It’s a slap in my face.”
He shakes his head. “How so?”
My chest heaves as I suck in quick, tiny breaths. “I’ve lost two babies—both of those I wanted. You saying you can walk away without a second thought is plain disrespectful. You know how those losses tore me apart. Hell, Hunter, they still do.”
His expression goes blank and he blinks. “I thought you said you don’t want kids anymore.”
I growl under my breath. “And we figured out it’s not that I don’t want them. It’s that I’m terrified to get pregnant. There’s a big difference. I can’t believe you can’t see it. You’re the one who pointed it out to me.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means that maybe I’m not meant to have my own.” My mind swirls because I’m not sure where my words are coming from. I don’t even know what I’m trying to say.
Hunter steps toward me with narrowed eyes. “Are you trying to tell me you want to help me raise this baby? That’s if it’s even mine.”
A spark of hope mixed with confusion takes hold of me. “I don’t know if that’s what I mean.”
I spin away and start toward his bedroom. This whole situation is too much.
“Dorothy, where are you going?” Hunter follows me.
