Page 92 of Star-Crossed
“Then don’t.” Cy cut his eyes toward the front door as he took a sip of his beer.
Ethan’s face turned a shade of red Cy hadn’t seen since their match against Boise High, when one of the defensive linemen made a comment about how much he’d like to 69 Caryn Townsend during Ethan’s cadence of called numbers right before the snap.
But instead of taking the opportunity to make his exit, Ethan walked around the coffee table and sat down.
“No,” he said, as if answering a question Cy hadn’t asked.
“Nowhat?”
“No, I’m not leaving. So you go ahead and keep firing off this angsty teenage bullshit as long as you want.” Ethan settled back into the couch, and the worn leather creaked beneath him as he reached for a copy ofDen of Geekon the side table. “I’ll wait.”
Cy shifted in his seat, the mix of guilt and defensiveness bubbling up inside him, making it difficult to breathe. He stared at the half-empty beer bottle in his hand, feeling the glass sweat against his fingers.
“I just need some time to myself, okay?” he said, attempting to inject his tone with something like penitence.
Ethan licked his thumb before turning the page and taking another sip of his beer.
“What I mean is, I process things better on my own.” Cy was dragging his memory of therapeutic terms as urgently as cops dragged a lake for a corpse, and for reasons just as dire.
“Huh,” Ethan grunted. “Can’t say I would have added more cut scenes toRealm of the Rat King, but what the fuck do I know?”
“Nothing.” Cy snatched the magazine from Ethan’s hands and tossed it onto the coffee table. “You don’t know one fucking thing. About gaming, about what happened between me and Lyra, about—”
“About what you’re going through?” Ethan finished for him. “You’re wrong,” he said when Cy didn’t answer. “When Darby was going to leave town, I—”
“You don’t need to do this,” Cy interrupted.
“Do what?” Ethan asked.
“This thing where you show up and tell me how you pulled your head out of your ass in time to save your shot with Darby. How you’ve learned so much about expressing your feelings and have grown as a person as a result. Nothing you say is going to change the fact that Lyra leaving town is the right thing.”
“Actually, I was going to say that when Darby was going to leave town, I acted like just as much of a pathetic asshat.” Ethan cleared his throat and picked at an imaginary spot on his jeans.
“Why are you here, Ethan?” Cy gripped the beer bottle tighter, willing his hands to stop shaking. “Why are youreallyhere?”
“To see how you’re doing,” Ethan said.
“So you can make sure the invalid isn’t in any immediate danger?” Cy spat, not even trying to conceal the toxic sludge of hurt and resentment in his gut. “Kind of like you did when the wildfire broke out?”
The room went silent as Cy’s words hung heavy between them like acrid smoke. He watched as Ethan’s face shifted, the impenetrable calm fading to a tired resolve.
“If you mean wanting to make sure my friend will be okay, then yeah, I guess I am,” Ethan admitted.
“What you did was humiliate me.”
Pulpy as Cy’s insides were at present, apparently all the shit he hadn’t resolved was going to come seeping to the surface.
“You’re right,” Ethan said in a more measured tone. “And I’m sorry. I have a responsibility—”
“I’m not one of your fucking responsibilities.”
A crease appeared between Ethan’s brows. “Is that why you think I came here?”
“Isn’t it? Isn’t that pretty much why you’ve always been coming here?” The adrenaline surged through Cy’s veins, causing his heart to race and his muscles to tense. Sweat beaded on his forehead, and the metallic taste of anger still lingered on his tongue.
However else this day ended, it would be with an answer to the question that had plagued him since he was still a boy.
Ethan rubbed the back of his neck. “I was wrong, okay?” he admitted. “I shouldn’t have made that call during the wildfire. But I did it because I fucking care about you, you numb shit. And when you won’t even talk to me about what’s going on, how am I supposed to know if the superhero shit you’re pulling around this town is actually you thriving, or just taking unnecessary risks because you feel like you have something to prove?”
