Page 56 of White Raven
“I remember,” Sarah smirked.
“The Brent that I knew back then…I hated him so fucking much, Sarah. There wasn’t a single thing I wouldn’t say or do to make his life a living hell. And he deserved it. But…”
Sarah leaned in after a few seconds of silence, pushing her to finish. “But?”
“You’ve always been such a level-headed, decent person. You’re smart, and you’re beautiful. You’re sweet, and compassionate. You’re rough around the edges, but you’re notlike other people, Sarah. When you hit me with communion in this apartment, and you came down on me about what I said to Brent at the hospital? I reflected back on that. I still do. I told him you weren’t like us. That you had already grown out of him, and it was only a matter of time. I meant that. I meant every damn word.”
Her stomach twisted, recalling the way she’d treated Wren that night. The betrayal that she’d felt, not having any idea that just weeks later, all this would happen to her best friend. To Brent. It settled in and rolled in her gut, and the only answer she could come up with then was that Wren had been absolutely right that day in the stairwell. While it might not have been her place, she wasn’t wrong, and it was her fault for not letting Brent go sooner and admitting it toherself.
“Looking back on that day…I remember feeling pity for the bastard. I distinctly remember staring at him too long. I dismissed it then and kept trying to dismiss it later. Like the day I saw him at Bunker’s. Brent was unraveling, and I felt—drawn to him. I guess the same way I feel drawn to all the other train wrecks I like to date. That kind of attraction never gets me anywhere. And I don’t want it.”
“You still don’t want it?” Sarah asked.
Wren didn’t answer for a minute, lighting herself a cigarette and staring off towards the bathroom. “I’m terrified.”
“Why?”
She rolled the cigarette back and forth between her fingers and stared down at it. “Because this is different. I think I realized the one thing I’m most afraid of that day at his mom’s funeral.”
“Say it out loud, Wren.”
Another deafening silence. She looked like she was at a complete war with herself…and she was losing. “I love him…fuck.” That cigarette hit her lips so fast, Sarah chuckled. “Thatword tastes so disgusting, I don’t even thinkactualpuke could take it away.”
“So…how long do you think you’ve loved him without knowing it?” Sarah asked, smiling.
“I can’t even begin to contemplate that. Isn’t this bad enough? Screw you.” Wren finally smiled, and took another drag, blowing the smoke a bit more harshly than necessary.
“Fair enough. But you need to tell him. Wren, that’s the one thing right now that he believes he doesn’t have. Fromanyone.”
“And that sucks, but a relationship is the last thing either of us needs to jump into right now, Sarah.”
“Nobody’s asking you to, stupid,” Sarah laughed, nudging her shoulder. “Just because you talk about how you feel, doesn’t mean it auto-starts a relationship. It’s just getting it out there so that you can decide what you’re willing to do about it. Aren’t you the least bit curious if he feels the same way?”
“Psh…no.” Another eye roll. Dramatic.
Liar.
It didn’t take a mountain of degrees, or even a high school diploma to figure out Brentdidfeel that way. It was painfully obvious when he and Wren were in the hospital together. And that wasafterSarah had wheeled him back to his room following that ridiculously intense make-out session in Wren’s room. Sarah’s phone finally rang. That picture of Athan sleeping popped up, and all the memories of what had happened between them only moments after she’d taken that picture, rushed back into her mind. She turned the phone to face Wren.
“Answer it!” Wren snapped, reaching for it. Sarah jerked the phone back.
“You see this picture? I took this about two seconds before you and Rhaena found me beating Athan half stupid and screaming at him. You remember everything you told me at thecabin?” Wren stilled and tensed, her cigarette only making it halfway to her mouth. “You’re running, Wren. Like I ran from it. You’re never gonna know how good it can be until you fucking stop. You need to at least go talk to him.” Sarah slid the call open and pressed the phone to her ear. “Hey, you.”
“Not me immediately being turned on by two words,”Athan snorted.
“Everything makes you hot. You’re insane.”
“Ah…but I was never really insane except upon occasions when my heart was touched.”
The way her heart nearly stopped when he dropped that line. “Poe…”
He chuckled softly.“Are you home?”
“Yeah. What happened with Brent?”
“He was provoked. It’s been twisted up here, but he’s on his way home now. Oddly enough, I think he might get outta this. The rest is gonna take time. He’s alright, though. You can stop your worrying.”
“Who said I was worried?”
