Page 31 of Dance With Me
“Well, you do, but I’m going to tell you anyway. How many weeks until the wedding now? Just under six, right?”
Joe nodded.
“So give it another week to figure out whatever this is with Seb or whatever you think it could be with Seb because, let’s face it, another week isn’t going to make much difference in the grand scheme of things. If what you’ve said about Clare is true, you probably won’t see her much anyway other than at the dance studio, so it won’t cloud your judgement. If you still feel this way next week, call it off. I’d rather see you happy and single than unhappy and married. Go to the extra classes, do as you would normally and be yourself with him.” Hazel made it sound as if it was the easiest thing in the world to do.
“It feels so wrong, though, Hazel. Like I’m stringing everybody along, being unfaithful almost.” Joe dropped his forehead to the desk and banged it on there a couple of times.
“You’re only being unfaithful if you take it further. You haven’t taken it further, have you?” The alarm in Hazel’s voice was evident.
“No, no. We may have flirted a little during the solo lessons but nothing else,” Joe assured her.
“OK, when’s the next lesson? Tomorrow?”
Joe nodded again. It was better than words at this point.
“So, go to the lesson, dance your butt off, and see what happens. If you still feel the same way about him and nothing for Clare, you’ll have your answer and you can call off the wedding.”
“You think this is the right way to go?” Joe really wasn’t sure and certainly didn’t want to lose any chance he might have with Seb.
“Do you want to see Seb again or not?” Hazel asked him, looking him directly in the eyes. “Then do something about it, Joe.”
“OK, OK. I’ll do what you say, even though I think it’s the worst plan ever.” Joe held up his hands. He did not want to get on the wrong side of this woman, but he couldn’t help smiling at her.
“Hey, I never said it was a good plan, but what else have you got?” She winked at him. “That’s what I thought. You men have no clue. Anyway, you have a meeting at three pm, so you’d better look sharp.” With that, she got up and left the room.
Joe stared after her. This must be the most ridiculous plan he’d ever heard, but he knew that if he called the wedding off now, he probably wouldn’t see Seb again. And he longed to see him. But, with Clare working tonight, he wasn’t going to be able to do anything yet anyway.
Urgh, why was everything so fucking hard! He pushed the thoughts from his head, got the accounts and reports for his later meeting and prepared to go over them. Sometimes losing himself in numbers was the only way he could quiet the thoughts in his head.
When he got home a little after seven, it was to an empty house. He made himself a sandwich and sat on his sofa to eat it, not bothering to sit at the table. The silence of the house made it easier to think.
Hazel’s words played through his mind. That woman had some fucking weird ideas. How Dave had put up with her for the last fourteen years, he didn’t know. Did what she said have merit? Was it stupid to wait another week? She had a point; another week wasn’t going to make much difference. Maybe to Clare, but he honestly didn’t think she was that invested in this wedding, either. Were they doing it just because it was expected of them or because they loved each other?
The more he thought about it, the more his head hurt. He groaned and put his feet up onto the coffee table. He looked at the phone lying next to him. No messages or calls from Clare. Used to be that they’d message all the time, never a day going by without some kind of communication between them, be it text, calls or FaceTime. Now? Nothing, not even a text today.
He picked the phone up and opened up Seb’s contact details. Should he message him? Was he that brave? He had no clue what he would say though. It was a little late to apologise for Friday, wasn’t it? His finger hovered over the message button.
He opened it up and stared down at the last exchange they’d had. It was from weeks ago when Seb had mentioned suitable footwear. Had he never messaged him afterwards? He thought back to their interactions. No, he hadn’t. They’d met for lunch and had several lessons but no contact other than that.
Joe decided if he was going to make a decision within the week, he needed to try to see if there was anything between them. He took a deep breath, his fingers hovering over the keyboard.
Hi Seb, it’s Joe.
Good start, he thought.Good start.
I just wanted to check that you were OK after Friday and to apologise again for my behaviour. It was unforgivable.
This was harder than he thought.
I hope that what I said hasn’t changed your mind about us being friends. I meant what I said, if you ever wanted to talk, I’m here for you. Anyway, I’ll see you tomorrow. Joe
His finger hovered over the send button, hesitating. Fuck it. He pressed send and put the phone on the coffee table, face down.
He took his plate into the kitchen and kept busy, loading the dishwasher and wiping down the surfaces. He poured himself a drink and stood leaning against the counter. Nothing.
When his phone vibrated, he almost dropped his glass. He tried not to run to his phone, he really did, and he was just glad there was no one there to see him almost faceplant on the sofa. He fumbled the phone and managed to catch it before it hit the floor.
He opened the phone and looked down at the message.
