Page 37 of Prince Charmless
I cough. “Excuse me?”
“Say whatever snarky thing you have brewing to make me feel bad about my date.”
Oh.
I hand her back the phone. “He looks like a maggot.”
“There it is,” she mumbles while scrolling through Cody’s profile. “Well, he has a dog. He should be very nice.” Melina displays a picture of Cody holding a surfboard next to a golden retriever.
“I have a dog, and I’m not nice.”
“You have a dog?”
“Yes.”
No.
Vinnie is more of my brother’s dog. Much like Melina, he only likes me when I have food.
“Listen, I don’t have time to deal with you and your stubbornness this week. This is the only night I don’t have something going on.”
Sadly, that part is true. I like dealing with her and her stubbornness.
Melina doesn’t move.
“What the hell does boardshorts have that I don’t?”
She shrugs. “Rent, probably? You know, one could say that you’re beingjealous.”
I roll my eyes at the very notion. What a silly idea. Me? Jealous? I’ve never been jealous of anyone in my life. Certainly not over Cody.
“Please, Melina, I’m on my knees.”
She scoffs. “No, you’re not.”
I have to do it now, don’t I? I find it so easy to swallow my dignity in front of her. I place one knee on the ground, then the other, and come face to face with her fantastic legs. Legs I bar Cody from ever seeing. She’s lucky. I’m not supposed to do this for anyone except the sovereign and God.
Melina’s eyes go wide like I’ve awoken something primal in her. “Get up,” she rasps.
“Meli—”
“Get up, get up, get up.”
I do what she says.
“Fine. I’ll blow off Cody.”
“Ugh. Can I at least watch?”
Her hand slaps against her forehead. “The ice you’re on is so thin, it’s nearing two-dimensional.”
Melina types something into her phone, looks at me, then types some more. She tugs at her bottom lip as if she’s really concentrating on how to send a simple text message.
“Let me help,” I say, stealing her phone.
She yells my name. I don’t care.
I erase herhey, I’m really sorry about this but,and take five seconds to craft my message before giving it back to her.
