Page 60 of My Fake Relationship With the Popular Boy
“Hey kid,” he said. He glanced around my room, looking a little concerned. I blushed. My room was in complete disarray, just as it had been since I got back from the grad trip. I told myself all weekend that I could leave the clean up for a couple of days since I had just gotten back. I had every intention of cleaning it all up Monday night but after my argument with Jaxon, I hadn’t been in the mood. “How’s it going?”
“Phenomenally,” I said flatly. I rolled on my back and stared at the ceiling. “Can’t you tell?”
He opened the door fully and walked inside.
“Some girl guides just came by,” he said. He held out a box of cookies. “I bought Chocolatey Mints cookies. Your favourite.”
I actually sat up for that, my hair falling against my back. I moved over on my bed so he could sit down at the end of it.
“Thank you,” I said quietly. I took the box from him and immediately opened it. After taking a cookie for myself, I held it out to him and he took one as well.
“I remember when you were in the girl guides,” he said. He turned the cookie over in his hand. “I used to walk with you so you could sell cookies door-to-door.”
“I remember,” I murmured. I wanted both my parents to come with me but my mom was always too busy — story of my life.
Dad took a deep breath. “I don’t remember you growing up… one day, you were an eight-year-old too scared to walk down the street by yourself and the next you were eighteen and worrying about who was going to take you to prom.”
I pressed my lips together tightly as I tried to hold back tears. Anytime my dad talked about me getting older, we both ended up crying. I felt so guilty that I would be leaving him alone when I left for school in the fall. Even though I knew it was the right decision, I was terrified of what he was going to do with me gone.
“Did something happen between you and Jaxon?” Dad asked. I looked out the window beside my bed to avoid his gaze. “I don’t want to pry or anything. I’ve just noticed a severe increase in the amount of Taylor Swift being played in this house and while I love her music, I do find it a little concerning.”
“Maybe I’ve just found a new appreciation for her work,” I said.
“Maybe,” Dad said agreeably. Because that was the thing about him; he really didn’t like to pry or ask too many questions. He got too much of that from strangers over the years —why did you wife leave, how will you take care of your kids, are yousure you can handle this?He knew what it was like to have every single one of your moves questioned when the only thing you wanted was to be left alone.
I sighed. “It’s nothing. We just had a small fight. But I’m sure it will be fine.”
“A small fight like you and Lewis had?” he asked.
“No,” I said.Jaxon would never hurt me the way Lewis did.“No, not nearly that bad.”
It was nice to put it in perspective a little. Sure, everything still sucked but at least Jaxon hadn’t used my deepest insecurity against me. At least Jaxon wasn’t my oldest friend betraying my trust. He and I were never supposed to be friends. We were just going back to the way things were before this whole stupid arrangement.
“Then I’m sure you will work it out,” Dad said calmly. I bit my lip. “You know, that’s how relationships go, sweetheart. Especially in high school. You’ll have your ups and downs, but if it’s meant to be, then you’ll find a way.”
I was so close to asking about if it wasn’t meant to be. What happened if we kept going through it all but it turned out that everything was just wrong anyway? But I didn’t let the words pass my lips because I already knew the answer — when it wasn’t meant to be, it turned into him and Mom.
“Thanks, Dad,” I said. He smiled lightly and patted my knee.
“You got it.”
twenty-two
After our argument,Jaxon and I didn’t really speak. We occasionally walked down the hall holding hands or pretended to pass notes in class so that people didn’t get suspicious and start some rumour that we broke up, but it didn’t give me the same fluttery feeling that it did before. It used to feel like some fun game or secret that only the two of us were in on. Now, it just felt like a chore.
I’d been walking on eggshells around Jaxon, not wanting to make him angrier than I already had; I didn’t speak to him when it wasn’t necessary, I didn’t bring up the time after prom again, and I tried to give him space as much as possible. As such, when I went to the common room during lunch on Thursday, I looked around carefully as I walked in, not wanting to bother Jaxon if he was in there. As long as I didn’t sit down, I could play it off like I just came in to refill my water bottle or something because everyone knew the cooler water in the common room was the best in the school.
But when I walked in, the only person I saw was Eli. He was sitting on the same couch where I’d first kissed Jaxon. Oh, how the time had changed.
Still, Jaxon not being in the room right then didn’t mean he wasn’t just in the bathroom or something. Maybe it would be better if I left, just in case. Though, there was nowhere else for me to go — especially since I couldn’t be sure if he was coming back here or if he was somewhere else in the school where I was at risk of running into him.
“He’s not here,” Eli said without looking up from his book.
“What?” I asked. I liked to live my own little delusional world where everyone didn’t know all of my business, even if I knew that wasn’t true.
“Jaxon and Sabrina went out for lunch,” he said. “I just stayed back to get some reading done.”
“Oh,” I said. I sat down in the armchair closest to the couch. Eli continued reading his book and I stared down at my hands, unsure of what to do. I didn’t even have any assignments to keep me occupied. I supposed I could try to study a little for my exams but I knew I wasn’t going to be able to focus anyway.
