Page 89 of The Healing Dragon
JANELLE
Idon’t hear from Jesse or any of the Oscuro boys for the remainder of the day. My worry over the earlier interaction upsetting Jesse only grows when I don’t hear from him by lunchtime. I skip lunch in favor of finishing my tasks early. I monitor the door, expecting him to show up any minute to check in, but he never does. Other than Isabel coming in and out, that door remains closed.
I walk into the library and find it more empty than usual for late afternoon. We still have a few hours until dinner, but I finished all the tasks ahead of time. As I always do with any spare time, I go to the library.
“Is Matias getting ready for the trip?” I ask, wondering why he isn’t here.
“They already left.” Santiago looks up from a paper to a clock, then back at me. “A few hours ago, actually.”
“What?” I sit down and look at my hands.
Perhaps things are worse than I imagine. I can’t even think of what exactly could’ve been the trigger. Leaving without aword isn’t like Jesse. My eyes focus on a bit of dirt under my nails. I’m often diligent to clean it all out before I leave, but in my hurry today, there’s still some left.
“Jesse didn’t tell you? Trouble in paradise already?” Santiago asks.
I don’t want to show that the comment hurts my feelings, so I push it aside.
“Did you hear about the impromptu visitors?”
He chuckles. “Who didn’t? Royals can be such spectacles. There are actual fan clubs for them. Did you know?”
Now that is ridiculous. I give Santiago a side glance and he meets my eyes. A belly full of laughter erupts out of him.
“Do you want to know if you have a fan club?”
“Absolutely not.” I get to my feet. “Actually, there is something I’ve been meaning to do.”
Now feels like the best time to do it. For the past couple of days, I have been circling questions that have no answer. At least I have no answer for them. But the answers might be closer to me and I just need to reach for them.
The last time I went in, I was asking something of them. This might not be exactly the same scenario, but I’m seeking something. I don’t want to get my hopes up, but I lose nothing by trying. After all, a small part of me just wishes to know if they would allow me in.
I make my way to the Fates temple. As I approach, the stone structure appears enchanting. The trees and leaves provide a contrasting green backdrop to the gray granite walls, only partially covered. The chirping of the birds blends into the magic of this place.
I close my eyes and remind myself I’m no longer the girl who once came here seeking help. Seeking freedom. The tightness that once shackled my wrist together felt like it would sink me in the waters of my reality. Now it all feels so vain.From where I am standing, the problems that once made it hard to breathe seem like nothing.
Stepping inside, I ponder if I will be denied entry. I don’t realize my eyes are closed for a second. The fear of rejection is just as bad as the fear of not knowing. I take a step forward and cross the threshold. The low glow of three figures above a small pool greets me. My feet are frozen in place. I have wanted to come here for so long, but now that I’m here, I can’t seem to move forward.
“Seek what you wish to find, but ignorance is bliss for the feeble,” the blue looking fairy says.
Her sisters don’t look my way, choosing to stare at the water instead.
Goading me is exactly what I needed to move. I sit on a stone bench across the water fountain and take in my surroundings.
As soon as I realized my stay at the Black Castle was going to be longer than expected, I knew I had to make a visit. I once pleaded with the Fates to alter my future. I’m not sure exactly what I expect or hope to get from them, but if I’m making amends and turning things back around, I need to make this request.
“I’m trying this new thing where I make things right.” A wave of shame passes through me. “I asked you once to change my fate. Would it be possible to change it back?”
“She is asking twice.” The pink looks up from the water.
“Just to fix things,” I hurry to say.
The gold floating creature moves closer to me. Its face is not human-like, but almost enough for me to make out an expression of comfort. “What is meant to be will be. Fate has a way of finding a way. One wrong choice does not alter the ending.”
The words hit me like a punch to the gut. I am scared butthose words give me so much hope. I’m winded as tears gather in my eyes. The emotions floating are high. It’s like everything I’ve pushed and compacted into my chest cracks open and is freely out for them to see. There’s no point in hiding.
“I want to be worthy.” A tear runs down my cheek and I wipe it with my palm. “I want to make up for all I have done.”
The visit of the other royal offspring has reminded me there’s a chance. I haven’t been all bad. There is room for redemption and something to go back to. Not to mention Jesse.
