Page 102 of The Breaking Pointe
Colton
When I finish scanning the old paper, my hands are fully shaking. I didn’t think I’d be reading a goodbye letter to her. And I surely didn’t want to know that he doesn’t believe in love. Because the problem is that I still do. Now I’m unsure if I should be hoping for that to happen for us at all.I respect his truth, but mine is that I do think I love him.I wasn’t planning on making the announcement tonight necessarily, but now I don’t think I ever can.
What if this means he never took any of this seriously?I never wanted to have a label on a relationship more than now.
The door opens, followed by the sound of footsteps fol- lowing and a deep, groggy voice. “Sweetheart?” Colton asks. I turn to see him rubbing his eyes.
I put the note in the box, dropping the ring and closing the box with mass speed. “No-Nothing.” I push myself up, still holding onto the box, almost as a safety net for the anger he might wail on me once he sees I’ve snooped.
“Whatcha got there?” he asks softly, blinking a few times before approaching me.
I squeeze my eyes shut, pushing the box into his belly with shaky hands.“I’m sorry.I wasn’t looking for anything, I swear.I just wanted to find clothes and it was there.”I breathe heavily after throwing all my words out as fast as possible.
“Noelle…” he says, lightly taking the box and then my hand. “I have nothing to hide. So I have no reason to berate you. Which I wouldn’t do, anyway.” He squeezes my hand and continues. “You’re shaking. What’s the matter?”
The box leaves his hand, forgotten, and soon his fingers are under my chin, making me look at him.I open my eyes with ease to see his gentle expression, waiting for my answer.
“I…Daniel would have been so mad at me for being sneaky. For a moment it just felt like I had to take cover…” I confess. “Well, drop your guns.I’m not here to yell.I don’t like doing that, and you’ll never get it out of me, promise.” He lightly pinches at my chin before continuing. “I only came in here because I woke up with no shirt, and no you.I had
questions.”Hehalfsmiles,holdingbacksomelaughter.
I wish I could smile at his sweet wittiness, but I can’t after what I just read. I have questions, too. With no way to ask without sounding beyond insane.
Hissmilefades.
“Okay, seriously, what’d you find—is it bad?”His eyes bounce around my face nervously.
“If I say it, then it’ll make you have to talk about things you don’t want to.You made it clear you’re not a talker.I should get over myself.I’m being insecure.”I look at my feet.
“In noway isthatfair.Ifyouwant toknowsomething,
you’re allowed to ask me, Noelle.There’s no harm in that.If clarity is something you need, let me give you that. I should be giving you a lot more, really,” he says, sounding ashamed. Preparing myself for the worst, I take a deep breath.“I opened the box.I shouldn’t be jealous, but I’m more than jealous.I envy her and how you felt about her,” I whisper my confession, then whisper the last part even quieter, “or
still feel.”
His bushy brows wrinkle in confusion.“Hannah?”
I nod.He looks at the box, then back at me, sitting me on the bed.
“Noelle, I haven’t had those feelings about her in longer than I can comprehend.It’s been years.That’s why it’s all in a box,” he clarifies.
“But you stillhavethe box. And a really in depth explana- tion on paper,” I remind him.
“My mom found the box in our old storage space. Guess I eventually thought about tossing it, and never got around to it, so I stuffed it in the drawer that I use the least.Icould probably sell the ring, though,” he explains, usinghis fingers to pry the box open and look inside.
Just please tell me I’m not losing it for nothing, Cole.“What happened between you two?” I ask.
His fingers fumble together as he stares at the floor, possibly gathering words.
“Uh—not much, actually. I think we were always destined to fall apart. We were too different. It felt right because we went to school together. It was familiar. For me it was a bit deeper, but I got over it.” He nods.
“And?”I ask, wanting more.
Helooksatme.“AndIchangedmyselftomeether
requirements. Beyond getting in shape, or making money. She was there for those parts, but I changed who I was deep down.I was scared to lose her, and well…I still did in the end.” He smiles softly.
My lips curl down, frowning. “So you proposed?” I clarify. “And she said no.”He looks down.“I thought it wasbecause she wasn’t ready, but it turned out that it was me. Shegotengagedtoanothermanayearlater,”hesays,
