Page 91 of Somewhere Only We Know
“He does?” I ask completely surprised.
“Bub, how well do you know Bryce?”
I rub my hand up and down her back and mindlessly watch what’s happening on the screen. “Apparently not well enough. I’ve played with the guy for years and as open as he is, he’s never opened up.”
“Well, how open were you?” Jax turns that around on me and I groan. “Exactly. Baby, even the happiest people can have the darkest memories. They can be the cheerleader, the class clown, the go-to guy, and they can be an All-Star. But you never know what people are hiding behind that. What they’re hiding behind the jokes and the smiles. That’s Bryce.”
I blink and swallow hard. “Was it like that with you?” I don’t have to clarify when I meant. Jax knows.
“No. I never made it a secret to those who knew me. My parents saw the aftermath of you. And surprisingly, so did Kamryn. Even in my sister’s worst period of fighting with Liam and then losing him, she saw me.”
I kiss the top of her head. I’ve apologized more times than I can count. I’ve made sure my actions backed up my words so that Jax knew that I was hers, that I’m staying. But no matter how much time passes, the guilt will still be there.
“Bryce’s twin sister was in an abusive relationship with his best friend. They were in high school when it started.” Jax lets out an aggrieved sigh. “He beats himself up for nothelping his sister. For listening to his friend when he mentioned how clumsy she was.”
“What?”
“I know. I think that’s why he’s so lively all the time. He wants that joy. He wants to see the good instead of the bad. So tonight was a trigger for him.”
“I’ve been a terrible friend,” I say.
Jax sits up and straddles my lap but not in a way that could lead to more. “Don’t do that. Don’t beat yourself up for not knowing Bryce’s past.”
“But if I would’ve asked–”
“Then what, baby? Would you have tried to change it?”
I look at Jax. Her silhouette is framed by the TV light and she looks like an angel. Not the best thought to have while talking about this. But hey, she’s in sleepwear and on my lap.
“No. I guess you’re right.”
“I know I am.” Jax says and slides off my lap. “Maybe now you can just be a better friend to Bryce. He’s all alone out here. I won’t be opposed to you hanging out with him more.”
I tickle her sides. “Thank you for the permission.”
“Anytime.” She says with a yawn.
“Sleep, Bee.” I tell her and kiss her on the lips before turning off the television.
With the room bathed in darkness, Sully in the corner on her bed snoring, my mind runs a marathon. I think back to every instance and interaction with Bryce. He’s always been my goofy friend. But then I think back to celebrities who hid behind humor because the darkness was threatening to take over. I don’t want that for my friend. We leave for spring training in two weeks and I promise to myself to do what I can to be the best friend that Bryce can have.
39
JAX
MID-FEBRUARY
“They loved it?” I say into the phone.
My manager called to tell me the latest numbers from my episode with Nate. I already reach more listeners than I could have hoped for, but this episode shot me up to number one for the last few weeks. Apparently people love a second chance.
“Jax, they want more episodes with you two.”
“I don’t know, Ness. The reason Nate and I work is because we have separate hobbies. I don’t wanna monetize our marriage.”
She sighs and I hear the tapping of her keyboard. “I know, Jax. But they’re offering a seven-figure deal. They take over the hosting, the distribution. If you thought your reach was great now, with them it could be astronomical.”
“Seven-figures?” I choke out. I make enough already from ads that run on my show, plus my Youtube channel. But this number, this illusive number, is more than I could ever dream of making.
