Page 76 of Let It Be Me
They leave after more awkward seconds of silence and my chest finally deflates from the breath I was holding in. I think I’m more in shock and that’s why the emotions haven’t hit. But I feel empty. Maybe that feeling of freedom is floating around just waiting for me to catch it.
“So that was them, huh?” Riley asks after he shuts and locks the door.
“Yeah. Can Momma and Pops adopt me too?” My voice cracks on the last words and Riley rushes over to me and pulls me into his embrace.
“Shh. They don’t deserve your tears, baby. None of them do. You handled them with such poise that it amazed me.”
“Seeing them here just threw everything off. I thought I was prepared for if and when I saw them.” The horrifying realization that my relationship with my parents is now unfixable brings a wave of tears to my eyes. But through it all Riley holds me together as I fall apart. His reassuring words slowly put me back together because being the one to keep myself together is exhausting.
“Paul was really your type?” Riley asks with a sneer after a few moments.
I watery laugh leaves me as he leads us to the kitchen. “I had a thing for the button up guys.”
“Huh,” he starts and grabs a pan out of the cabinet. “You’re saying I should change my style?”
“Absolutely not. I love what you wear and if you get rid of those jeans that mold to your thighs I’m withholding sex for a week.” I threaten and jump up on the counter beside him.
“I was just joking about the style change. But good to know where your head is at.”
I pull Riley between my spread thighs and rest my hands on his shoulders. “Thank you for letting me handle them.” I say getting serious, my eyes stinging from the tears that are now threatening to fall again.
“I was never going to step in unless I absolutely needed to. But you didn’t need me. Because you are stronger than any of us give you credit for.” His hands lightly cradle my face and I feel his gaze move everywhere.
“I love you. In case I haven’t said that enough.”
He looks up to the ceiling and moves his head side to side as if in thought. “You have. But I’ll never stop loving the sound of those words coming from your lips. I love you too, angel.”
I slide my hands up and wrap them around his neck, pulling him towards me and pressing my lips to his. It’s a kiss that’s full of gratitude that he lets me fight battles on my own. I’ve never been so thankful to have someone in my corner who’s not silently trying to tear me down day by day. Riley champions for all of my successes and I were a better woman, I would let him go and let someone other girl experience his joy. But I’m selfish in my need for him, in my need for him to lift me up when I wake up feeling low, and in myneed for him to make everyday feel like an adventure I’ve yet to take.
“No.”
“Sarah, please!”
“Kamryn, I’m not letting you design the dress I wear to marry you two in. That’s not happening,” I say to the grumpy future bride from across the table. “If you don’t want wrinkles before you’re thirty, I’d stop frowning.” She sticks her tongue out at me and I dish it right back.
Riley and I decided at the last minute to have a double date with Kam and Mason at my place. I think it’s cute the way Riley likes hanging out with him as he’s like an older brother that he never had.
We’re two months out from their big day and planning has been relatively smooth. Do I have a dress yet? No. Has my best friend made it her mission to convince me to allow her to design and make it for me? Yes it has been.
“But, I need something to keep me busy,” she’s outright begging at this point.
“Don’t you have your actual job to be doing?”
“Yes!” Mason shouts from the living room.
I give Kamryn a look and get up from the table to head to the living room, leaving her sputtering at my retreating form. Riley opens his arms to me and I fall into the space next to him and throw my legs over his lap. No sooner than I’m settled does Kamryn join us.
“Where are your plans to honeymoon?” Riley asks.
“I want somewhere hot, like a beach. Or anywhere tropical at the moment,” Kamryn says when she sits next toMason. “But, I’d have to make sure I haven’t committed to any shows.”
“How do you not know?” I ask with a laugh.
“They all just blur into each other year after year. I have no clue what I have or have not committed to yet.”
Mason looks at her with the most content smile on his face. Since they got engaged the man has not stopped smiling. It’s a bit creepy. I feel like I’m back in college watching these two.
“What about you Mason? What do you want?”
