Page 21 of Encircled in Darkness
“I need to get my phone from the truck.” His eyes glanced to the small ashtray and he smirked. “I’ll be right back.”
Leaning over, he kissed me slowly, his hand caressing my jaw before he entered the house. I could hear the front door open and close as I sat watching Nova enjoy his second serving of dinner tonight. Looking into the darkened yard, remembering the scarred man and his look of malice aimed at me, I closed my eyes and tried to remember exactly what he looked like.
The shadows had covered most of his face, but his black eyes and menacing demeanor shook me to the core. What if Nova hadn’t alerted me? The evening swirled around me and the shaking deep inside started. Tears built in my eyes and I fought to stop them from falling. I was almost attacked, and James was there to save me. The drunks were dickheads who harassed women, and I had dealt with that kind of crap since I grew boobs at twelve.
It was the man in the backyard that had me terrified. My mind swirled through the possibilities of what could have happen if he had gotten ahold of me and none of them were good. Having lived in the Flats until I was ten, I understood that evil existed in the world. Real evil that would swallow you up and devour you if given the chance.
Nova jumped into my lap, which brought my mind back to the present and away from the horrible things I witnessed growing up. I scratched behind his ears as he purred and settled on my legs. Closing my eyes, I exhaled, hoping to make sense of everything. James’s soft t-shirt engulfed me, and his smell surrounded me. Woodsy and all man and that was enough to lessen the panic. The sound of the front door closing and the locks sliding into place gave me a moment of peace as James returned to the back deck. If he was here, I was safe.
What happens when he realizes you’re a whore? He’ll leave just like everyone else and you’ll be all alone.
“Try this.” He remarked and kissed the top of my head.
I turned to find James offering me a vape pen. Confused, I looked up at him. He chucked and drew in the moist vapor and blew a cloud into the air. “It tastes better than that joint. Easier to carry and personally, I think it’s a better high.”
I took it from him and drew softly on the pen. Holding the small amount of vapor, I exhaled and felt the buzz radiate down my body. I smiled up at him and tried to hand it back to him. “Thank you.”
“Keep it.” Reaching down, he lifted me out of the chair and sat down, placing me on his lap.
I leaned my head onto to his shoulder and whispered, “Why are you so good to me? You don’t even know me.”
He spoke into the waning night sky, his words touching the darkness that had been growing since the day I signed a piece of my soul to Victor. “The first time I saw you, I knew you were meant to be mine. I knew I would do anything,” his words grew deep and deadly. “and kill anyone to have you.”
“You know that sounds crazy, right?” I asked, praying this wasn’t a line he was giving me.
I wanted nothing more than to belong to James, but not like I belonged to Victor. I wanted someone to love me, to hold me when the darkness encircled me, and gave me a false sense of calm. I watched as the sky turned grey on the horizon, ushering in another new day. I could feel his steady heartbeat as he held me securely in his arms.
“What’s crazy about knowing someone is meant to be yours? There’s a part of you, deep inside, that knows it’s true. I feel it and I know you feel it too.” His deep voice resonated in his chest and I sat up, meeting his intense star. “I know you have no reason to trust me, but I promise I’ll never treat you like he did.”
I could feel the tension in his body, and I leaned in, placing a gentle kiss on his lips. Smiling against them, I resisted the urge to rub against him like a cat in heat. He brought his hand up to the back of my head and held me tightly as he licked the seam of my lips, demanding entry. Opening, he thrust his tongue into my mouth and slowly caressed the wet recesses.
Pulling back, he smiled at me and I laid my head on his chest with a content sigh. My eyelids grew heavy and I fell asleep in his arms, secure.
The slap came out of nowhere and my face was flung to the side. There was a ringing in my ear and the entire left side of my face throbbed and stung. Natalia was at the grocery store, using the last of the money she and I had earned from helping around the trailer park to get us something to eat. I brought my hand to my face, the burning from her slap growing and the hot tears stinging my face.
We lived in a run-down trailer park in a shitty trailer in the Flats of Portstill, and I swear this was the worst place in the park. There was a hole in the floor along the hallway and we had to use buckets to catch the water when it rained. Our mother was usually gone with a man, trying to earn her fortune, but I heard what people called her.
Whore. Slut. Tramp. Homewrecker.
I was almost ten years old, but I already knew what that meant. I had heard her with men and as much as Natalia tried to shield me from her activities, I still saw things that made my tummy hurt and confused me. ‘Mom’ started screaming at me with a cigarette hanging from her lips and I cowered away from her, hoping she didn’t hit me again.
“Why are you so worthless? I told you to clean the house because I had company coming over and look at this place. Fucking pathetic. I should ship you off to you father and let him deal with you. Or better yet, he can share some of his money and get me out of this place.”
Her. Not Natalia and me.
“Who’s my father?” I asked, hoping for once, in her drunken state, that she would give me a name.
“Shut up, you stupid shit. I don’t have time for your questions.” She mumbled and staggered down the hallway into her bedroom.
Looking around the trailer, seeing it was as clean as I could make it, I sighed heavily. She left her empty liquor bottles and half burned cigarettes everywhere and got mad if I touched her stuff. Opening the squeaky front door, I went to the picnic table outside the front door and waited for my sister. She came down the road, both arms a carrying bag, and I jumped up to help her.
She saw the bruise forming on my cheek and sat the bags on the table. She was twelve and had been taking care of me for years. She hated to leave me alone with our mother, afraid she would become violent, but one of us had to be home when mom woke up or there would be hell to pay.
Exhaling, she turned my face and shook her head. “What set her off this time?”
“I didn’t clean the house the way she wanted it for her company tonight.” Rolling my eyes, she released my chin and smiled sadly.
“Like anyone would come to the shithole.” Natalia whispered and we both snickered behind our hands.
