Page 59 of Embracing My Nightmare
The next part was what would be the deciding factor in whether she wanted to stay with me or not. I reached over, lit the joint, and inhaled deeply before passing it to her. She glanced at it and with trembling hands, she took it and drew the smoke deeply into her lungs. Handing it back, I took a hit and continued.
“On the fifth anniversary of saving you, I went out to celebrate. You were free from all the bullshit and I was getting closer to my time with Marco being over. James had been gone for a few months and we were talking about getting an apartment together. I walked in and saw Marco with a video feed of you playing in a backyard with some other kids and I felt rage overtake me. I walked up and stabbed him in the neck before he could tell anyone who you really were.”
I watched her for any signs of trauma or panic over my declaration, since she had done the exactsame thing to Cameron. She appeared unaffected, so I kept going, taking another hit off the small joint and passing it back to her. “I used the money I found in Marco’s safe and hacked the state system to find you. I pushed paperwork through, finding you adoptive parents that I could trust. Roger was my mother’s brother and I thought I could trust them to take care of you. I didn’t know about what happened on the beach with James and the aftermath, or I would have gotten you out of there immediately. They hid your abuse and it was only when James found your pictures and showed them to me thatI knew you were in danger again.”
“Can I ask something?”
“Anything,” I replied and meant it. Whatever she needed to put her mind at ease, I would give her.
“Did you want me . . . like . . . that . . . all those years?” Her eyes cast down and then she looked back at me, vulnerable and scared. “Was I just a pet for you to control?”
“Lamb, I swear to you, I saved you because I saw a precious little girl about to be swallowed up in the Flats. I knew what that felt like and I had to rescue you. I promise, until the night I walked into that room and saw you laid out on that bed, I didn’t think anything like that. Only, you were too young, and I was too tied up in my . . . businesses . . . to instigate anything. You deserved a chance at a real life, and I found Chuck and Blaire, knowing they would be the best parents for you.” She smiled and nodded and I knew I had at least gotten that part right. “They would protect you, love you, and help you grow. I stayed away all those years, hoping that you found someone to love you like you deserved. But I couldn’t stay away anymore. Not when I realized how much I needed you.”
“So, you waited for close to ten years to be with me?” Her eyes were wide.
I simplyreplied, “Yes, and I would wait another ten if I had to.” I prayed she wouldn’t make me wait ten seconds, let alone ten years, to know if I still had her heart.
“Does anyone know who my biological father is?” she inquired.
“His name was Steve and he was the pimp who ran the house. He must have gotten your mom pregnant and hid his connection to you. Or he didn’t know you were his. The day I left to handle business, when Cameron approached you, I found your father. He had died of a drug overdose shortly before I got to him. I was going to kill him for what he had done to you.”
She cast her eyes across the room, her gaze locked on the wall as she spoke. “He called me cockroach and loved to hit me in the back of my head,” she admitted and absently rubbed her head. “I saw him kill a woman. He choked her to death while he was raping her, and he made me watch. Afterward, one of his guys beat me with a belt for being there.” Taking a deep breath, she admitted, “I’m glad they’re both dead.”
“I’m so sorry for everything you had to live through. You never deserved to be born into the life they exposed you to. I’m sorry I couldn’t have saved you from it all. I’m sorry . . . I couldn’t save you from Cameron.”
I reached my hand across the center cushion, meeting hers in the middle. Linking her fingers with mine, she smiled sadly. “Where do we go from here?”
“Will you tell me what happened with Cameron? If you feel like talking about it.”
Elise chewed on her lip and I slid closer to her, my hand reaching out and caressing her cheek as I let my strength flow into her. She leaned into my embrace and her green eyes glistened with unshed tears as she began.
“He made me think he was going to help me. I didn’t know who James was and it scared me that something like last time was about to occur. He threw my phone out the window and used something on a rag to knock me out. I woke up tied to the bed, the memories bombarding me from every direction.”
She released my hand and stood, beginning to pace the living room and I gave her the distance to work out her thoughts. She turned and spoke, “He told me all about my loving mother and how much she missed me.Loving mother my ass,” she murmured.
“He tried to get in my head, and he . . .” closing her eyes, a tear fell down her bruised cheek and I stood and pulled her into my arms.
“You don’t have to say it.” I felt the wetness of her pain on my skin and I pulled her tighter against me.
She murmured against my chest, “He didn’t touch me, not exactly.” I closed my eyes and pushed the anger away.
“When you showed up, I knew I had to get him to believe that I was on his side. I never meant to kill him. I just wanted to stop him from hurting you.” She sobbed and I felt her knees buckle.
Following her to the floor, I held her as she cried, washing the pain from her. Kissing her softly on the top of her head, I heard her ask, “Do you still love me?”
I pulled back and lifted her teary face by her chin before locking my gaze with hers. “Lamb, I’ll love you until the last breath in my lungs. You’re everything to me.”
“Why do you call me lamb?”
“You were so small and innocent the first time I saw you. You reminded me of a delicate lamb that needed protection from the wolves. So, I became a wolf and protected you myself.”
Leaning up, she slowly brought her hands to the side of my face and looked at me. Placing her soft lips against mine, she kissed me with no rush. I stroked her soft skin and reveled in her embrace, feeling my heartbeat for the first time since the moment I realized she had been taken.
***
Elise
HE PRESSED HIS HARDbody to mine as we kissed delicately, the years of pain and secrets forgiven through our embrace. Pulling back, I shifted in his lap and he grunted deep in his chest. Looking up at him, I saw the stitches near his temple and the dark bruise that was forming. I gently reached up and stroked his cheek, his beard soft under my palm.
