Page 28 of The Hand That Holds Me
“If I get in that shower with you, we won’t eat dinner tonight and I really want to cook for you.” He wanted honesty and I was going to give it to him.
“You’re right.” No anger or resentment in his voice. He steps back from me and begins to walk toward my bathroom
Thank goodness I liked to keep my bathroom tidy and clean, no underwear on the floor or used towels to hide.
I showed him where the fresh towels were and left him to start dinner. I needed the distance from him to get my heart to slow down. This relationship was moving at what most people my age would consider slow, but I was still afraid we were moving too fast.
I prayed that he wouldn’t shatter me and the heart I just gave to him.
We enjoyed the simple dinner I made and talked until we heard the front door open. I looked at the clock and realized we had been talking and laughing for hours, if Caroline was already home.
She came into the living room with a smile on her face as she saw us on the couch. Being the outgoing person, she is Caroline walked right up to him and leaned down to give him a hug, engulfing him in her love and warmth.
“It is so nice to finally meet you. I’m Caroline. Maddie has told me so much about you but if you hurt her, I will bury you.” She said with a huge smile and conviction in her voice.
I believed her too. Uncle Joe taught us to defend ourselves, how to shoot accurately, to fish and hunt, and to be able to work on cars. He never wanted us to be dependent on someone else in an emergency or have someone take advantage of us. He also didn’t believe in “male jobs and female jobs”.
His thought was that anymore, regardless of gender, everyone should learn different skills to be adaptable and self-sufficient. Men should be able cook and clean and women should be able to work in the yard and repair common items.
Lucas chuckled and smiled his huge smile back up at her. “It is so good to finally meet you too. You really are a firecracker, aren’t you? Please, let me ease your mind, Caroline. I have deep feelings for this lady right here,” as he pulled me in tight to his side. “I am enthralled by her and I would rather hurt myself than to ever cause her any pain. I’ve fallen for her, pretty hard.” He admitted as he leaned down and kissed me gently on my temple.
Her mega-watt smile let me know he had passed whatever test she felt he needed to take. I loved her for her fiercely protective nature.
“Well, on that note, I’m going to take a shower and head to bed. Mom and Dad will be here around ten and I want to have breakfast ready when they arrive.”
She leaned down and gave us both a quick hug and walked out of the room, leaving a slightly awkward silence in her absence.
“You’ve fallen for me?” I whispered to him, afraid I had heard him wrong. I wanted reassurance with my trust issues but I didn’t want to sound needy.
He stood up and pulled my body into his, arms engulfing me in a hug and my face resting in the crook of his neck.
It felt like home. He felt like home. The smell of his cologne, his breath on my neck, his strong arms wrapped around me, how he made me feel safe. Everything about Lucas was perfect.
“I have completely and totally fallen for you. You enchant me and I watch the minutes tick away when we are apart, willing time to go faster until I can be near you again. You settle my soul, Maddie. Your beautiful heart, your devotion, and your wit are just a few things that make you perfect for me.” He kissed me with a level of affection we had yet to share.
We stood there, in the middle of my living room, kissing and holding each other, expressing our feelings without words. Allowing the love to pour from our bodies and channeled into a kiss that took my breath away.
“I need to get home and you need to get ready for your aunt and uncles visit. Do you think you will have time to call me this weekend?”
“I can call you when I go to bed tomorrow and we can talk, but when my family comes around like this we tend to get lost in each other and the laughter we share. I hope that’s okay.”
With a kiss on the lips he said, “It is more than okay. Spend time, talk, laugh, and love each other. I hate that we can’t be together this weekend but I’m glad they are coming to visit. I never want to get in the way of your family.”
“I would invite you to meet them but…” I wasn’t sure how to finish that without it sounding weird.
He took control and said the exact right thing to calm me immediately. “This weekend isn’t about me meeting them. There is plenty of time to meet each other’s families. We are still getting to know each other, and even though we are sure, let’s take things slowly with the families, for now.”
“That sounds really good. Good night, Lucas.”
“Good night, sweet Maddie.”
I locked the door behind him and went to bed with the biggest smile I had ever had. My dreams were filled with Lucas and two green eyed boys who resembled him. A yard filled with toys and a future filled with laughter and love.
Home.
As I drove away from Maddie’s apartment into the traffic of Atlanta on a Friday night, I thought about everything that had happened today. All the affectionate touches and kisses, the laughter and the love that swirled around us in a thick cloud.
I knew she was scared about opening herself up to me. Her actions spoke much louder than her words. She was afraid to give her heart away and for it to be broken.
