Page 25 of The Hand That Holds Me
“Maddie, honey. Life is a risk. You never know what’ll happen from one day to the next but you can’t let fear ruin your chance at happiness. Love is worth everything, even heartbreak. You risk everything for love and if your heart is telling you Lucas is the one, trust it is the truth. Now, I’ll be there Saturday morning and I’ll see what I may have to help you understand the past a little better. Your mom kept diaries when we were younger so I’ll see if there is anything in her boxes. I‘ve waited for years for you to be ready to look through her stuff. Are you sure this is what you want?”
“Yes Ma’am, I’m sure. Thank you, Aunt Lisa.”
“Never thank me sweetheart. I love you like you were my own and I am honored that you are my daughter.”
Her words, like always, brought tears to my eyes. I was so lucky they took me in and raised me, not one time treating me different than Caroline. They could have let me go into the system, but Aunt Lisa is the best kind of friend imaginable.
We hung up the phone and Caroline brought me in for another hug. She was my strength and the closest person I have in my life. I don’t know what I would do without her.
“I love you, you know that, right” I asked her, hoping she understands just how much she means to me.
“I know and I love you too. You are my best friend, my sister, and my confidant.”
“And hopefully, one day soon, you will tell me about Andrew.” I tried and approached him very carefully. For her to keep quiet means it was bad or hurtful. I wished she would tell me so I could help carry her burden like she did mine.
“Maybe.” That one word said so much. My poor Caroline was heartbroken and wouldn’t allow anyone to help her. For over two years she’s been in a funk and I was determined to break her out of it.
The rest of the week flew by with Lucas and I eating lunch together at the office. Each day, he surprised me with something new and delicious.
I felt like I’d gained a few pounds this week, not constantly running around at the bar. My feet were so happy being able to wear pretty heels that spent most of the day sitting nicely against the wall behind my desk. I’m a country girl at heart and I’m more comfortable barefoot indoors.
Throughout the day, we’d walk into the other’s office for a particular question and end up in a heart stopping kiss. They were mostly slow and sweet. With each brush of his lips to mine, I fell more in love with him.
How do you tell someone you have just met you love them without sounding crazy? I knew he had feelings for me, he admitted it to me, yet I still held back. Afraid he would break the little piece of my heart he already had. What would happen if I gave it to him entirely and he destroyed it?
He drove me home after work everyday and, even though I hated the traffic, I treasured the time we were in his car enclosed in our own little bubble of happiness. That’s what I felt around him. Happiness.
We took turns playing songs from our playlists, seeing how our music taste matched up. We had a lot of the same tastes from Elton John to Avenged Sevenfold. I was slowly making him a Breaking Benjamin fan and he was introducing me to this really eclectic band called the Dead South. It is catchy Canadian Bluegrass. Yeah, I know, strange. At first, it’s a little weird but it grows on you quicker than you want to admit.Catchy ass songs.
Friday rolled around and we only worked half a day. Lucas wanted to take me out for lunch and as we were driving into downtown, I had a sudden craving. It didn’t take much convincing for him to pull into theVarsity. People came from all over to have one of their famous burgers or chili-dogs.
We got in line and placed our order when the lady yelled at us. We had to order fast because the place is always packed, but after trying one, most people are willing to get a little bruised for them, though when you are my size, lines are intimidating.
We ate in his car at a little park a few blocks away. It was nice outside today, the humidity not terrible, and the weather actually felt like Spring. The blue skies above make me happy, and I felt like my mom was watching over me, smiling.
I wondered if she would like Lucas. Would she give him the speech about treating me right and always taking care of the people you love?Probably, knowing her.
I looked over at him and wiped some chili off his cheek.
He smiled at me and we sat in silence enjoying each other’s company. It was nice not having to make small talk with someone. A person’s ability to handle silence showed me a lot about them. He, so far, hasn’t felt the need to do anything more than look out at the park, and every so often squeeze my hand.
I leaned over the gear shifter and he turned his head to meet me in a soft kiss. I pulled back and got lost in his eyes. They were the most amazing jade green that contrasted against his dark hair and beard.
“How did I get so lucky to find you?” he asked, causing my heart to soar. His voice was gravelly and his eyes appeared to glow in the afternoon sun as he took my cheek in his hand.
His thumb slowly caressed me as I leaned into him for comfort.
“I’m the lucky one. You are pretty amazing Lucas and I’m glad I took the chance to open my heart to you. Please, be careful with it.”
“It is the most precious gift I have ever received and I promise to treasure it, always.”
I looked deeply into his eyes for any sign that he was lying. All I saw was love looking back at me.
“Let’s get you home so you can get some rest before your company arrives tomorrow.” He reached over and buckled my seat belt back, securing me before we drove back onto the interstate.
The drive was over faster than I wanted and I was sad I wouldn’t see him until Monday at work. Aunt Lisa and Uncle Joe were staying until Sunday afternoon to spend as much time as possible with us. I think they may have empty-nest syndrome and I often wondered why they don’t adopt or foster kids now. They were great parents and are only forty-three years old.
Caroline and I have been gone for nearly three years and I think they would be happy if we lived back home again. They both tolerated Atlanta but preferred the smaller cities and communities, over the hustle and bustle.
