Page 7 of When You Least Expect It
My lips twitched at that.“Gotta love confidence in a woman.”
“Most young women are,” she retorted.
“I was talking about you, you cuckoo bird,” I informed her.“Only a confident woman would be so cavalier about her fiancé checking out other women.”
“That’s only because I know that Mitchell would never cheat on me,” she replied seriously, making me feel happy for her all over again.“The dude’s got it bad.”
“I would hope so,” I laughed.“Otherwise, why ask you to marry him four times?”
“Right now, I’m more interested in all the possibilities of your new neighbor,” she said, ever my biggest cheerleader.
“Well, if his face matches his body, then it’s safe to say that he probably has a wife,” I sighed dramatically.“Or at the very least, a girlfriend.”
“I can’t make out a ring or anything,” she murmured.“It’s too far to tell anyway.”
Turning from the window, I said, “It’s probably all for the best.I already have one neighbor that I try to avoid whenever I can; I certainly don’t need two.”
“It’s definitely not as easy as changing your phone number,” she agreed.
“Honestly, I’m better off shagging one of Mitchell’s groomsmen,” I joked...kind of.
“Small wedding, remember?”she said as she finally made her way back to the table.“It’s only you as the Maid-of-Honor and Daryll as the Best Man.”
“It’s really unfair that Daryll’s married,” I sighed again as I joined her at the table.“I bet he’d be the best wedding reception mistake in history.”
“The man does look good in a suit,” she remarked wistfully.
I eyed my sister from across the table.“Is there going to be a band or a deejay?Even though I’ve sworn off deejays, I’m not opposed to a band member.”
“Sorry, we’re hiring a deejay,” she answered.“And it’s a she, so there’ll be no shagging in that direction.”
“You’ve already picked out the entertainment?”I asked, surprised.“I thought we were barely on invitations.”
“Her name is Yvettte, and she’s Daryll’s cousin on his mother side.So, naturally, Daryll gave us her card, and according to her social media accounts, she’s pretty good.”
“What about the bar?”I asked hopefully.“Is there going to be an open bar?”
“Are you out of your mind?”she squealed.“Do you have any idea how expensive that would be?”
“How about an usher?Valet?Porta-potty attendant?I mean, that’s how long it’s been since I’ve gotten any, Abrielle,” I told her.“I’m about to hire an escort.”
She let out a laugh, knowing that I wasn’t serious.I mean, there were times when I wished that I was ballsy enough to be that reckless, but we both knew that I didn’t sleep around, much to the dismay of all my lady bits.
After Abrielle stopped laughing, she said, “Well, maybe your sexy neighbor can be your plus-one.”
“He’s married, remember?”I said, already giving up on him.“And his wife is probably some retired supermodel, and I bet that their children all have high IQs.”
“Jesus, I love you, but you need help,” she retorted.“Your doomsday attitude towards men cannot be healthy.”
“It’s realistic,” I argued.“And since living in delusion is a sign of a mental defect, I’m the epitome of mental health.”
“We’re definitely going to have to agree to disagree on that one,” she said as she grabbed the tablet back from me.
“Well, since you’re my twin, if I’m cuckoo, then so are you,” I informed her like we were still five-years-old.
Ignoring my logic, she said, “I’m thinking it’s between Loving Calligraphy and Ancient Elegance.”
I gave it some thought before asking, “And what’s wrong with eloping?”
