Page 13 of Ignited Spirits
I tilt my head in confusion as the earlier rage drains away and I process what she said. “What?”
Izzy’s lips kick up at whatever she sees on my face. “Your eyes were glowing almost neon purple, and you crossed the room to back me against the wall faster than I’ve ever seen anyone move.” Her smile drops. “I just hope I didn’t take away your wolf.”
“The only thing you did was bring me back. Whatever happens with my wolf happens, but it’s not on you. And you know what? I’m gonna be okay with or without my wolf because I have you.”
I mean every word I said, but I can’t deny the soul-crushing grief I feel about possibly losing my animal. Even though my wolf can’t speak, he’s still been a constant companion throughthe hardest parts of my life. And being a shifter is a huge part of who I am.
I don’t really know how to be me without a wolf, but I will take those thoughts to my grave. Izzy doesn’t need to know how I really feel. She moved heaven and earth to bring me back to life. Yet she still feels like she didn’t do enough. I’m not going to add to that by telling her my worries.
Her lower lip trembles as she tries to hold herself together. “But it’s not fair.”
My heart cracks at the pain and vulnerability on her face. I’d give anything to fix everything for her, but I don’t know how to.
“It’s not,” I agree. “But unfortunately, that’s life sometimes. It’s not fair that your magic was banned, that my parents died, or that Lua did what she did, but those things still happened. All we can do is make the best of the situation.”
“I wish I had to deal with the consequences, not you.” Her voice breaks, and I give in to the urge to hold her. Wrapping my arms around her, I tightly hug her to me, trying to make her feel at least a little better.
“And I wish every day that I could take the burden of healing ghosts and taking down Lua from you. But sometimes, no matter how hard we wish, the things we want and need don’t ever come true,” I murmur into her hair.
She doesn’t say anything as I hold her close. Her shoulders shake slightly, but she doesn’t make a sound. Bishop worriedly watches her from next to the bed. He doesn’t make a move to intervene, though, trusting me to comfort our mate.
I’m content to have her in my arms like this forever, but she eventually pulls away to peer up at me. “Have you always been this calm and accepting about all the shitty things that happen in life?”
I snort and shake my head. “Not even slightly. I used to complain all the time about even the smallest things, and I ragedat the universe when my parents were killed. But being angry and sad and bitter didn’t fix anything. All it did was hurt me and those around me, so I’ve worked to have a different outlook.”
Staring at me for a heartbeat with what looks like admiration, Izzy gives me a small smile, even though her gaze is still swimming with sorrow. “You’re incredibly wise, sunny boy.”
Rolling my eyes, I scoff. “I’m many things, sunshine, but I don’t think anyone would ever claim one of those is wise.”
“I would, and anyone who argues with me is wrong. Are you going to argue with me?” She juts out her chin and wordlessly dares me to disagree with her.
Barking out a laugh, I shake my head. “I know when I’m gonna lose, so I won’t argue with you.”
Even though I don’t believe her that I’m wise or smart or whatever, hearing what she thinks about me still makes my insides feel all warm and fuzzy.
Izzy gives me a satisfied smile. “Good. Lemme get dressed really quick, and then we can go see what his royal pain needs.”
I reluctantly release her, and she strides over to the bed to grab the borrowed clothes. Before she can make it, Bishop snags her around the waist and pulls her to him.
He leans down until their noses touch. “I love you, sweetheart.”
Instead of feeling jealous about Bishop and Izzy’s relationship, I just feel happy for my mate. She has so many people who care so damn much about her. Plus, the more of us there are, the better we can protect her. It’s a win-win.
Izzy melts against him, and her storm-cloud eyes soften. “I love you too, St. James.” Her mouth kicks up in a teasing smirk. “You can still be a dick sometimes.”
He laughs. “I’m aware. Now, go get dressed before my restraint snaps. Unless you want me to spank your ass, bend youover the bed, and shove my cock in your tight little pussy while Archer watches.”
Izzy’s mouth opens and closes a few times before she does what he said and hurries to the bathroom. I chuckle at the look of complete and utter shock on her face at Bishop’s dirty threat.
I don’t know why she’s so surprised that the five of us are constantly thinking about fucking her on any available surface. She’s gorgeous and our mate. Of course, we want to take her at every available opportunity.
Once the door clicks shut behind Izzy, I scrub a hand over my face. It feels like the weight of everything that’s happened is just hitting me now that she isn’t here to lift me up.
It was a matter of days or hours ago that I died. And now I’m standing here like my heart wasn’t forcibly removed from my chest.
While I’m grateful to get another chance, I don’t know if I deserve it. So many better people than me have died and never come back, like my parents.
What makes me worth saving? What makes me deserve an escape from my fate? What could I possibly add to the world to justify getting another shot?
