Page 49 of A Seaside Escape
At the beginning of her second week, Cara had taken Mallory shopping in Kingston. She had bought nearly a whole new wardrobe of clothes and was wondering if her baggage allowance would take it on her journey home.
The day after shopping was a day of art galleries. Mallory was in seventh heaven. There was a Julian Forster original on display and she stood for what felt like forever just staring at it. She and Sam had been to an exhibition of his in Edinburgh once and they had both agreed on how talented he was. Funny that this piece should be in Canada now. At the end of the visit she purchased a beautiful little print of a painting she had fallen for immediately. It was of a couple standing on a pier, looking out to sea whilst they held each other. It kind of reminded her of standing with Sam on the Atlantic Bridge.
That night she went drinking and dancing with Cara, Ryan and a few of their friends. They danced all night and Mallory drank far too many jell-o shots. She even remembered kissing a total stranger and then at the end of the evening she had been a sobbing mess – the worst kind of drunk – and had cried all over Ryan’s shirt, staining it with mascara. All the way home in the cab she had sobbed, apologising to Ryan and Cara over and over for her behaviour and for betraying Sam’s memory. What she failed to realise is that they understood and wanted her to stop feeling guilty already.
The morning after the nightclub Mallory awoke late and was too ill to get up. Her tongue felt like it could be used to carpet the stairs and her head was thumping to a beat of its own making. Renee brought her a tray of breakfast in along with some Advil for her head. She gave Mallory a knowing look and shook her head smiling.
Seeing Renee made Mallory’s eyes well with tears. ‘I’m so sorry, Renee,’ she sobbed, feeling ashamed of her behaviour. She wasn’t sick, although in hindsight being sick would probably have taken the edge off the hangover.
Renee stroked her cheek, ‘Oh darling, we’ve all let our hair down. Even me.’ She winked.
Mallory couldn’t imagine Renee doing jell-o shots and dancing on tables.
Once she had forced down the bacon and maple syrup that Renee had brought her, drunk her coffee and freshened herself in the en-suite bathroom, she made her way downstairs to face the music. They were all sitting around the breakfast bar in the kitchen chatting and drinking coffee.
‘Ah, here’s my English little sis,’ Ryan announced as Mallory appeared in front of them all.
‘Morning everyone. Listen I know what I did last night and I wanted to say—’
Ryan held his hands up as he interrupted her, ‘Mallory. Stop. You have nothing to apologise for. You said sorry around a hundred times last night and you got mascara all over my new shirt.’ He laughed
Mallory’s lip quivered. ‘I… I feel so ashamed.’ She put her hands to either side of her face as tears of embarrassment cascaded down her cheeks.
Ryan walked over and hugged her. ‘Hey, c’mon, don’t you cry again. This is a clean shirt. I’m warning you.’ He smiled down at her. ‘You’ve been through so much, honey. We all get it. We know that you can’t be alone forever and we don’t want you to be. That guy last night seemed nice. He gave me his number and asked if I would pass it on. Do you want it?’
‘Oh, no! I can’t believe I kissed him. It wasawful. I didn’t even find him attractive. How terrible of me. You must all think I’m such a slut.’
Renee gasped and shook her head. ‘We think nothing of the sort, dear. You couldn’t be more wrong.’ She spoke softly, trying to defuse Mallory’s anguish.
Ryan chuckled. ‘Mallory, will you stop? So you kissed a guy and you didn’t like it – hey didn’t someone write a song about that?’ He chuckled at his lame Katy Perry reference. ‘Next time it may be someone you actuallylikeand that’d be cool,’ he reassured her.
After the family had spent an hour convincing Mallory that they still loved her, in spite of her kissing a total stranger, they convinced her to grab a bag with her bathing suit, sun lotion and a towel. They were taking her to Alwington beach.
It was a beautiful old beach surrounded by large country estates owned by very wealthy people. Luckily, Renee had friends in high places and so they all went along to sunbathe and splash about in the water.
Mallory enjoyed laying there, sunglasses covering her eyes and the sun beating down on her skin.
After she had laid there for a while, someone blocked out the sunlight and she opened her eyes to find Ryan standing beside her. ‘Hey, Mally, are you okay?’
She nodded. ‘My head’s still a bit fuzzy but I’ll live.’
‘Maybe a swim will help?’ He smiled and gestured behind him. ‘C’mon, the water is… ahhh… okay I won’t lie, it’s freezing, but not too bad once you get in. Come on! You know you wanna!’ He ran off to grab Cara and pull her into the water with him. She squealed with delight as he picked her up and spun her around before depositing her into the icy waters of Lake Ontario.
Mallory laughed as she watched them from a safe distance. For some reason Greg sprang to her mind. He had given her the ‘happy to be friends’ speech and then had gone off and picked up some random girl who now seemed to have taken up half-naked residence in his house.
She mentally slapped herself as the thoughts whizzed through her mind.What right have you got to judge him? He’s single. He’s attractive. He’s a man and men, like women, have needs. So, he’s screwing an Addam’s Family reject, what is it to you? You don’t want him. You just don’t want anyone else to have him.
She recoiled at the barrage from her subconscious. Was that the problem? Did she want him to want her? Was it true that she liked feeling wanted, but didn’t like it when his attentions were clearly aimed at someone else?
Mallory’s heart pounded as she thought through and analysed her reaction to seeing Trina at Greg’s house. Immediately another snide comment sprang forth. He’s only known her two minutes. What kind of man moves a woman into his house after that long? A desperate, pathetic, sad and lonely man, that’s what. Maybe a man with something to prove?She shook her head as if doing so would eradicate the mental altercation between the two parts of her psyche.And anyway, you don’t know that she’s moved in, for goodness’ sake.
She stood up, threw her glasses down on her lounger and ran straight for the cold water. That was one way to derail her current destructive and pointless train of thought.
*
The days seemed to fly by and before she knew it she was down to her last three days with the Buchanan family. It had been such a wonderful experience. A lot had happened for Mallory in three short weeks, including planning a memorial service in Sam’s honour where Mallory would get to meet all of the people who loved Sam and becoming godmother to Ryan and Cara’s little boy at his baptism. They named him Dylan Samuel Buchanan and she had cried when she had discovered this. Knowing Sam’s name would live on in the family filled her with a combination of happiness and regret that he wasn’t here to realise it.
In some ways she felt that being there without Sam gave her a sense of closure. She knew now that what she had with Sam was extra special, but that she didn’t want to give up on love entirely. She saw the way that Cara and Ryan looked at each other and the way they looked at their baby son. She had listened to stories of Sam’s dad from Renee. The fondness with which she spoke about Bill Buchanan made Mallorywantto love again.
