Page 81 of Time After Time
I scoffed in disbelief at her words. The pressure from furrowing my eyebrows so hard was triggering a splitting headache throbbing at my temples.
“But in another way, you’re not oblivious. You know.” Sylvie’s voice was quieter now, but it had a sharp edge that cut through my chest. “You know you haven’t looked at Sebastian as just a friend in a long time.”
Her words hit me like a punch, and I felt my breath catch in my throat. My eyebrows lifted, trembling as the tightness in my chest grew unbearable. The world around me blurred, the tearswelling up and clinging to my lashes, waiting to fall, which they would do soon.
“You know,” she continued, each word landing harder than the last, “that you’re in love with him. You’ve been in love with him for who knows how long. And for whatever reason, you’re burying it—pretending it’s not there. And now… you’re letting him walk away forever?”
Her eyes locked on mine, and that last word,forever, felt like it shattered something deep inside me.
A soft whimper escaped before I could stop it.
The night air, once warm, now felt icy against my skin, and I shivered as goosebumps crawled up my arms, my hands becoming red. My body knew before my mind did—everything I was losing because of my own fault.
“He’s leaving, Gen,” she whispered, her gaze almost pleading. “He’s leaving, and you’re just standing here, letting it happen.”
“No,” I shook my head, desperation creeping into my voice. “He’s leaving for America. He’ll meet new people, make new friends, and discover things he never imagined. And I’ll be here… waiting. I would never tell him not to go to America. It’s his dream, and he’s fought so hard to achieve it and…”
“Gen—” I shook my head, not wanting to hear anything she had to say, but Sylvie pressed on. “It doesn’t matter that Sebastian is leaving. He promised you he would come back, and he’s a man of his word. He’s going because of his dream… his passion. Sometimes, that means stepping away from the people you love to make those dreams come true, but it doesn’t mean having to leave everything else behind. It doesn’t mean you don’t care about the people here.”
I sighed deeply, wanting to scratch my face and bite the skin around my thumb. “And I can assure you, it’s much harder for him than for anyone else. Everyone else is staying here, in thesame place with the same people. He’s the one who has to adjust to a completely new lifestyle and surroundings.”
“I know, and?—”
“And it’s also his decision to choose whether he wants to meet new people or try for a long-distance relationship. You’re taking that choice away from him by letting him think you don’t feel the same, Gen.” She chuckled softly, her own eyes glistening with unshed tears. “You know, I’ve always known for a long time that Sebastian had a crush on you. Then, one day, I realised it had turned into something much more. But I saw it in you too. Maybe a bit later, but I noticed it.”
Her gaze softened as she continued. “I saw you looking out the window, that huge smile on your face when he showed up. I saw how you came home from being out with him, practically bursting to tell us everything that had happened, although sometimes I could tell you wanted to keep some memories for just the two of you.”
I couldn’t hold it back anymore; sobs escaped me. “I feel selfish.” My voice trembled, and I had to look at my sister more intently to make sure she understood me. “I feel selfish because a part of me wants him to stay here, even though I know he needs to go to America and chase his dreams. I’ve seen everything he’s gone through—the good and the bad—and I couldn’t be prouder of him.Gosh, I’m so proud of him. Yet there’s this tiny part of me that wants him to stay. Does that make me a horrible person?”
My sister shook her head, a teary smile breaking through. “It makes you human. A human in love.”
At her words, I broke down completely, loud sobs wracking my body. But unlike usual, my sister didn’t step forward to wrap me in a hug. She stayed in the same place, not saying anything while I felt her eyes on me.
“But there’s that tiny part of me that?—”
“Why?”
“Uh?
“Why is there a tiny part of you that doesn’t want him to leave?” Sylvie’s voice sharpened, and my eyebrows furrowed even deeper, which I didn’t think was possible. With what sounded like a scream, she stomped her foot on the sand, frustrated. “Why, Gen? Why?”
My heart felt heavy, and a strange sensation washed over me, like millions of tiny pins pricking my skin. “Because… because I’m absolutely in love with my best friend. I’m in love with Sebastian.”
“Yeah, you are.”
“I love him, Sylvie.” I cried out, my sobs stronger than any wave crashing against the shore. “I love him so much.” Now, I was the one gripping my chest as if making sure my heart wouldn’t jump out of it.
“You do.”
“I’ll see you later.”
I took off running, the hem of my dress gripped in my hand as I kicked off my shoes, my bare feet pounding against the pavement. I could hear Sylvie’s footsteps behind me, but I didn’t dare glance back. I raced all the way from the festival, pushing myself toward something I’d buried for far too long—something that could change everything.
When I reached home, I slammed the front door open with force, wincing as it hit the wall behind me, but I didn’t stop to think. I bolted straight for my room.
Once inside, I took a breath, my hands on my knees, my body shaking from the effort. I felt like I might pass out, but there wasn’t time to waste. I rushed to my wardrobe, yanking it open, barely pausing before a sudden movement at the top shelf made me freeze.
Mr. Whiskers was there, sitting proudly, his tail flicking back and forth. He let out a softmeowbefore pawing at something next to him. A box.
