Page 18 of Storm in a Teacup
David cocks his head. “Then why…?”
Linny’s hand removes from mine. “I should go,” she says gently, as though trying not to disturb us. But I snatch her hand before she can leave. I need something to hold on to. Desperately. Someone to ground me.
“I’m trying…” I groan, dragging my free hand down my face. “Because I’m stupid, mate. Why else? Stupid and mortified. And I thought…well, figured you wouldn’t want anything to do with me. To keep yourself safe from my…lustful thoughts.”
He cracks a small smile. “Eloquently put. No, Ben. No. I still want to be your friend. I stillamyour friend. I miss you.” He glances at Linny, holding tightly to my hand. I’m not looking at her, but I can feel her eyes on me. “You’re not still…?”
“No,” I lie. “Of course not. I mean, it’s been six months, like you said. I’ve opened a whole café in that time. All the time in the world.” I squeeze Linny’s hand to remind me that she’sthere—and to remind myself that I’m here. “I’ve moved on.”
David gawks between Linny and me, a realization in his eyes. “Right. Okay. Wow.” Relief crosses his face. “Good for you, man.”
I should correct him since he has the wrong idea. I don’t. Linny must not have seen what David saw, so she doesn’t go to correct him either.
“So, friends again?” he asks hopefully.
I force a smile. “Yeah. Yeah, of course. Sorry I’ve been so…some.”
He tips his head sympathetically. “I love when you’re you, Ben.”
That guts me, but I don’t let it show. The smile stays plastered on my face even though everything inside me is crying out in pain. Why does it still feel like this? Why is my heart still crumbling in his presence?
I suggest, “Can we get dinner soon?”
I’m trying. See, I’mtrying.
David lights up. “Yeah. Yeah, good idea.” He looks like he wants to hug me, but I am still pressed against the wall on the other side of the counter, so he can’t. “I’ll text you.”
“I promise I’ll answer.” My eyes skirt around the café. “I-I have to close.”
“Right. Sorry. I’ll get out of your hair.”
Old me would have made a joke about how I wanted him in my hair, not really knowing what I meant by that. This me just asks, “Did you want anything before you go?”
He points to the glass case. “Scone?”
“Sure.” I finally push myself away from the wall to reach inside the case and grab the pastry. In doing so, I let go of Linny’s hand. The calm air she spread over me vanishes. With my hand visiblyshaking, I pass the scone to David. “On the house.”
“Thanks,” he says, offering one last smile. “I’ll see you later?”
“Aye. Later.”
David exits, and I sprint to twist the bolt behind him. Once the door is locked, I keel over with my hands on my knees, heaving like I just raced across town, not to the door. My vision is blurry as I suck in a staggered breath.
“Ben,” Linny says, coming up to me and placing a small hand on my back. “Are you okay?”
I shake my head. “No. No, I am not okay.Fuck.” I stand up straight, her hand losing its place on my back. “I’m a fucking mess.” I swing my arm out in the direction of the street. “I am desperately in love with the man who just walked out that door, and Iliedto him about it because I have spentso muchtime trying to get over him but failing over and over again.” I aggressively shove a hand through my hair. “Sorry. I don’t need to be dumping this on you.”
“I don’t mind,” she says.
“Well, you should. I’m just the madman who owns the café next to your shop.” I exhale, eyes closing in defeat. “Who may have implied to my best mate that you and I are dating.”
She reels back. “What? I missed that.”
“I figured.”
“We’re not dating, though.”
“I know that,” I snap. I huff out a sharp sigh. “Sorry. Lin, I need to close up.”
