Page 40 of Three Not-So-Little Words
“Colton, look at me.”
When he finally does, I ask, “What’s going on? Are you nervous about school?”
“Kind of.”
“Well, let’s talk about it. Maybe I can help.”
“I don’t want kids to make fun of me like they did at my old school.”
My stomach knots because this is the first time I’m hearing about anyone making fun of him.
“What would those kids say?”
“Things about me not having a mom anymore.”
Anger courses through me. What kind of kids talk shit about a boy who lost his mom? I bite my tongue, trying to figure out the best thing to say.
I feel like I’m in uncharted waters, though. Natalie usually handled all of these types of things.
I guess I better figure it out.
I kneel next to the tub to try to get more on his level.
“You know what the coolest thing about starting a new school is?” I ask.
He shakes his head back and forth.
“You get a totally fresh start. Nobody knows you or knows anything about your past. None of the kids in that school are going to know a single thing about your mom, and if you don’t want to tell them anything about her, you don’t have to.”
He thinks about my words for a moment before turning to look at me. “Do you think they’ll like me?”
“Are you kidding?” I exclaim. “You’re the coolest kid I know! They’re going to love you.”
He still doesn’t look convinced. I ask, “Do you remember what your mom used to always say? If you can be anything in this world, choose to be kind.”
He nods.
I knew he’d remember. She’d say that all the time. Ironic that she was such a pacifist, yet she fell in love with someone who fought for a living.
No wonder we didn’t work out.
I go on to say, “When you go into school, just be kind. To everyone. I’m sure you’ll make friends before you know it. And tomorrow morning, on the way to school, we will go get some donuts. And we can have anything you want for dinner.”
His eyes light up. “Pizza?”
“Anythingyou want. While we eat it, you can tell me all about your awesome first day.”
That seems to put his mind at ease for now. Tomorrow morning, we may have to go through all of this again, but that’s okay. We’ll do it as many times as it takes for him to feel comfortable.
“Come on, bud. Let’s get you out, so we can finish getting ready for bed."
Twenty minutes later, teeth are brushed, pajamas are on, and a nature show is on the TV. He talked me into sleeping in my bed again. I thought that when his room was done, he would be more eager to sleep in there.
I guess not.
It takes no time at all for him to fall asleep next to me. It’s only when he’s passed out that I let my mind wander.
Immediately, Ronnie takes over my thoughts. We spent the better part of the day in bed. No matter how hard we tried, we couldn’t keep our hands off each other.
