“You’ll know the furthest reaches of hell before I’m done with you because you knew I was kept from her. You were probably part of the plan and then told everyone here she had no wolf. You forced a Beta’s daughter to go through turmoil you can’t imagine. Because even though your wolf LOATHES you, you had her. You will suffer for what you did to my human.”
I was thrown back to the front of my mind while Freya panted. I linked her, “You’ve never done that.” Freya said, “I need a minute to recover. Stick with mate, I’ll come back to the strength I have quicker than without him.” I assured her, “If he wants us, I will.” Freya snorted, “He does.” I really wanted her to be right.
I knew Stephanie was unconscious, but I didn’t care. Nothing was real yet everything was real. It was too much to feel. I’d just been wishing for my dad back, and now... I couldn’t even look at him. What was wrong with me?
Logically the answer was being hurt and betrayed. I felt like he abandoned me. Him, mom, and Tristan. Jason abandoned me a long time ago in my mind, so that didn’t hurt as bad….but he’d written. Or maybe it wasn’t him…but the pretense of our relationship didn’t die. We still communicated even if it was mean.
I hit Stephanie harder when I remembered Kai’s words. Everyone said he looked like his dad because Tristan was his dad. I was so dumb. I thought I was a genius, but I wasn’t. I didn’t even know my family was alive.
My mom’s voice broke through telling me it was ok. OK? We were so far from ok we couldn’t even see it in the rearview mirror. Stephanie locked me in closets and let her stupid husband paw at me. When I broke his hand, I’d been the one who was accused of doing something wrong. She’d mocked me every single time I was punished. She tried to starve me to death.
At first when I came here... I respected the Alpha and Beta position because that’s what I’d been taught to do. Even the Gamma, and he was the biggest punisher I had. Rage filled me when I thought of Booker.
He could run… but I knew all the places he could hide. I had the Ring’s network…well some of it. That meant Booker couldn’t stay hidden from me for long. I had a more expansive network of spies in the Resistance than he could ever imagine. I’d find him AND his wretched son.
My anger at Stephanie fired all over when I heard my dad. She’d turned me against Jason. She made it so I didn’t have my brother. So I was all alone. Why would Alpha Kyle work with her? Freya whispered, “He didn’t. Thunder is genuinely distraught and doesn’t understand. None of the Red Run wolves do. Hell, none of the wolves here understand what’s going on.” So they were all still talking to her.
Eventually I felt sparks… they were getting stronger than before. Which was crazy. They were so powerful already. Freya explained, “As I get stronger so will the sparks you feel. You would always feel them. Even those without a wolf, they just intensifies with one.” She sounded stronger again. An overwhelming sense of needing Alexander to comfort me hit me.
I buried my face in his chest. My head, heart and body hurt. How could they leave me? Xander comforted me leaving me speechless by saying that he’d known the entire time who I was. Freya coughed, “Told you so.” That was true, she had. I needed it all to go back into the box.
Freya linked, “We know what to do now. We leave with our mate. Spear is ready and he wants us to be happy.” That was true. At one time... I’d always known I’d be by Xander’s side. Now... I had this pack. I was in a position of leadership here. Caine taking over was good… but he’d need me.
Caine linked me, “The Resistance fight carries on. We have holoports all over, and you can still fight that fight. We are all still in the Resistance together, but I’ve got this. You trained me and I’m ready.” He was. Eventually all of us Resistance members were going to have one heck of a meeting.
Xander was going to figure it all out. Heck… they all were. Alpha Eric looked pretty suspicious…. So did a lot of the Hackura related to Xander. I noted Hastein wasn’t here… but that was ok. I knew where he and his siblings were. Dark on a mission. That was fine. I shook that thought out of my mind for now.
Buck linked me, “You want them to keep me on as the GAMMA?!” I replied, “Change is hard… you have these moments… and I know there’s a good guy inside you. He’s just buried under the survival mode…. person.”
“I think you can do it, but if you don’t… I’ll be back. Avery still believes in you. I believe in Avery. Don’t let her down…or me…because I did research your whole bloodline…to prove you were a good choice for the Gamma…because…people deserve the chance to be the people they are…”
“You were raised in fear…and you did what you could which is more than most. You have a rapport with Caine and Dax that is like what a Gamma does…you step towards Caine when Booker sneers at him…you’ve had his back…so yeah…the Gamma.” Buck nodded to me, his surprise and gratitude evident.
I linked Caine, “Xander told me they are leaving people behind to help you.” He said, “Well that will be nice. You always said they were different kinds of Alphas than I was used to. They’ve more than proved that in less than fifteen minutes.”
Tears pricked my eyes because it was true. These were the good Alpha’s that I’d told them about, and this is what you did. You didn’t let good people fail. An Alpha’s job was to protect people. It flowed through their very veins, and the Conners were good Alphas.
I left them to talk because I knew Former Alpha Eric was in control here as the Leader of the Werewolf Council. Once we reached the King’s house Xander snapped all my stuff packed. I needed to get my stuff from my other place. I had things there I wanted.
I opened the floor safe and nearly cried in relief that my Xander wolf was there. Mason told me he’d found it. I linked him, “Thank you.” I needed both him and Hendrick in Black Mountain with me. They were my anchors through the whole ‘Drake not being my dad’ storm. They centered me. They helped bring me back from the brink.
They agreed to come. I linked them both, “I know I keep saying it…but thank you.” Mason threw me the keys to my bike. Freya linked, “Our family is waiting outside to talk.” I muttered, “I’ve been waiting nearly seven years….and never got what I wanted. I’m choosing avoidance, and they can deal.” Freya said, “Fair enough.”
I opened the garage and took off. The anguished faces of my family and all the Red Run wolves seared into my brain. I didn’t want to hurt them, but I needed a second. They’d ignored me for years… I really couldn’t be given a few moments to grasp the fact that they all somehow survived that day?
To cope with the fact that they never came for me. Did they think I was dead, like I’d thought? No... Kai said I was dancing. So, they knew I wasn’t dead. My dad even asked how I wasn’t in New York. Thoughts swirled while I quickly made the drive to my other place.
Freya linked, “You know bringing him here means mate will definitely figure it out.” I agreed, “Yes. He’s smart but… it’s fine… I’ll tell him everything eventually. He’s not going to guess I am the leader of the Resistance. He will just think I’m in it….besides…he already had the address.”
Freya snorted, “True. No one is going to suspect a teenager started and funds the Resistance.” I reasoned, “Mason and Hendrick started the funding really… I just took over later.” Freya snorted, “Not much later and only because you gave your money away to good causes. I have your memories. You even tried to pay them back.” I had but they’d refused.
When we got to my place I got us up to my actual floor quickly. Xander couldn’t see me in pictures. Weird… magic. It was definitely magic. Then Aesir’s words hit me. Things aren’t what they seem. I’d probablyhave to ask Paige if someone could spell me specifically not to appear in pictures. Wouldn't I have noticed? Xander asked how I felt. I didn’t know. Betrayed. Numb. Really freaking confused and hurt is how I felt.
I finally broke when I looked at the picture of our family. We were happy. Weren’t we? Were they glad to get rid of me? Was I a burden they were just glad was gone? I knew I was annoying and I told them using my facts when they were wrong. I didn’t mean anything bad by it…I was just trying to help.
I needed some idea of what we were going to be walking into at Black Mountain. My family would be waiting there. Xander explained what happened. It was clearly a highlighted version, but headaches? All because a Vampire can compel them.
Stupid freaking goddesses. That Vampire was supposed to be long since dead. Whatever. I’d look into that. Headaches wasn’t a good enough reason to me right now. I’d fought for Jason. For Grandpa Ben, Grandma, Esther, my uncle, and aunts even after they’d disowned me.
