Sierra smiled at me, and I couldn’t help but smile in return. We all ate together. Other than at King’s diner… this never happened. Cayden and Micah would eat with me… .my friends would too… but this was an actual Alpha and a Beta eating with me again.
Not the future leadership. Not my friends. An Alpha and Beta who had their ceremony to have the title. I hadn’t done this since leaving Red Run. Our family used to eat with the Kyle’s all the time. This felt weird, yet normal.
Then it hit me, the kitchen was a mess. My mind flashed to being locked in the cupboard. The dark damp cupboard that locked from the outside had an additional deadbolt so I couldn’t get out. It was triple reinforced.
I’d even dislocated my shoulder trying to get out. I couldn’t be in a small space. My mind flashed to the hole. The hole that I’d been put in many times, including after not shifting. I ran into the kitchen. I couldn’t go back there. I should’ve soaked the pan. I began to scrub the first pan I found.
Sierra linked me, “Mel, they don’t care. We aren't at home. No one’s going to lock you away and I’m pretty sure they arefreaking out right now.” She was probably right… but I couldn’t stop. I heard a snap, and my hands hit the sink.
One glance told me all the pans were clean now. Freya said, “You knew mate could do that.” Logically, yes… and now I felt bad because he looked sad. He was probably disappointed in me. I’d ruined this two perfect week goal already.
Freya disagreed, “He’s worried about you. He doesn’t care about the pans. Those rat bastards shouldn’t have done that to you. You were a teenager who had never cooked before. You didn’t know those things. It was unfair and they are unworthy of their titles for doing that to anyone.” Well, she and I agreed there.
Xander spoke in a soft and comforting tone. Maybe he wasn’t mad about the mess then. Sierra linked me, “It’s really ok. We aren’t at home.” I was being pathetic. I was a Female Lead Warrior for goodness sakes. I could beat up Alpha’s... Beta’s… Gamma’s… the list went on. Yet here I was losing it over dirty dishes.
Freya offered, “You’ve been physically and emotionally abused. Just because you are a badass doesn’t mean that doesn’t have an impact on you.” She was very wise for a wolf who had never had a human before.
Freya snickered, “I told you, I’ve been around for a while and I’m an old wolf. I was just waiting for you.” I still had no clue what that meant. She told me, “Now is really not the time for that conversation. Before you ask, I don’t know when will be. Your life was not to be this way. I need to figure out a new plan for us and our path.” Ok, fair enough.
Sierra suggested sitting outside. She knew being outside calmed me down. Xander hung back and comforted me again. I was really wishing he hadn’t noticed the near panic attack over the dishes. Freya chimed in, “For the love of god. You can’t lieand that panic attack over the dishes was obvious. You weren’t even lying.”
I replied, “I didn’t say that much… about it… mentally I thought it, but I didn’t say it.” She blew out her breath. “Melanie, I feel you think you pull off things you don’t. You were not calm. He is an Enforcer with amazing hearing. He could hear your heart betting erratically.” Ok, well that was true.
Xander’s story about his mom was super sweet. I had heard she baked things for Alpha Eric before though. I was from Red Run. They talked about it a lot. My mom even had some of those recipes. I changed the subject to his favorite foods.
Freya snorted, “You already knew his.” I replied, “I had a logical guess based on his ordering history. I did not actually know.” She laughed in my head. Mason had taught me how to cook steak. I was pretty good at it.
Xander’s favorite dessert made my heart skip a beat. I smelled like strawberries. Could he know? He had to have smelled my stuff before... right? But then he would’ve known I was his before I left. Wouldn’t he? The answer was he would so he didn’t know I was Melanie.
Freya sighed, “You really are going to be very stubborn about this. You knew his favorite dessert too.” I grumbled, “I had a logical guess based on the data of his orders.” I practically felt her purse her lips at me.
My thoughts startled when he asked me in return. I honestly hadn’t thought about my favorite food in years. Mason’s burgers were good. I also loved sugar cookies though, not the evil cookies. Freya agreed, “Those peanut butter cookies do seem to be our enemy.”
I was glad she was on my side about that. No one else used to be and it was VERY annoying. I sighed because if I could have my family back, I’d bake them their weird cookies every damn day. Which probably meant figuring out where the HECK theycame from but I could do that now. I had skills I didn’t then. Charles had really improved my dark web hacking skills.
We joined Sierra and Phil. Freya seemed excited about the hike and I found I was even smiling about it myself. Maybe Xander would shift for me. Freya purred, “Yes, I want to see Oden.” I did too. Oh gosh…I needed to hide my Xander wolf at the bottom of my bag.
Freya asked, “Why?” I replied, “He would see it.” She chuckled again offering, “He’d be flattered.” I replied, “But he might recognize it… and that’s problematic.” She hummed.
Sierra linked, “Are you ok? You mentioned T was going to teach you snowboarding.” We never got around to it, but he’d planned to teach me in Black Mountain’s territory one day. I replied, “I’m fine.” She reached over and grabbed my hand. I smiled at her. I reiterated, “I’m ok.”
We sat there drinking for a bit in silence… which bothered me a lot. I was biting my lip, so I didn’t fill it since I’d already embarrassed myself over dirty dishes. Freya disagreed, “You have nothing to be embarrassed about. The reprobates that are the reason you have trauma associated with dirty dishes do.”
Sierra announced, “Ok, we are going to shower. You guys do the same. Alexander, please conjure a few outfits of Ashley’s to my room. We will meet you downstairs in a half hour.” Xander pulled me into his lap and kissed me. He agreed, “Alright.”
Sierra led me to where Phil’s room was. I told her, “I don’t know how I can hide my scars…. I have some of my mark concealers… they don't make the words disappear though.” Sierra knew that already. I’d tried to get the formula perfect, but those marks… the words Trevor carved into my skin… they wouldn’t go away. Freaking Trevor.
Freya growled, “He will die.” I agreed with that. I had several plans on how to arrange it. She snarled, “By my claws sounds good.” Well, I could come up with more and new plans sinceI had her. Sierra rubbed my arms saying, “Your Xander won’t care.”
I snorted, “He will absolutely care.” Freya agreed, “Yes, he will. He’ll go full Hackura golden eyed Alpha Duke Squadron Leader about it.” Yeah, he would. Sierra sighed, “Just get in the shower and we will figure it out.” I quickly followed that directive.
Once I got Sierra wiggled her eyebrow suggestively. She commented, “You still smell like him. Did you get you some of that? I did, not your mate obviously. I meant mine. WHEW! That man…” She trailed off amending, “I mean my man knows what he’s doing in bed.”
I blushed, “Umm well... we... you know… did... things… and stuff.” Sierra snorted, “You had sex.” I nodded. Sierra jumped out of the shower and hugged me. She squealed. I quickly sorted through the stuff Xander had conjured in here.
I grabbed black skintight leggings and a green shirt with a black vest and gray beanie. I quickly did my makeup with my red lips. Sierra got dressed. She grabbed my hands saying, “It’s going to work out, I just know it. It’s you and me and once Caine and Dax take over, we’ll get Avery and Ads to Black Mountain.”
I asked, “Uhhh what about Paige? We will…” She snorted, “Paige will literally just follow you. She will curse Edward if he so much as tries to say a word to the contrary. Virgil and Valentina will shimmer wherever you are, and Crush will follow Virgil. So, that side of the group is handled.” I smiled, “That would be perfect.” Except I was certain some of my friends would be perfect with some people from my past in Red Run. I shoved all that from my mind.
