Page 25 of Connected By Stars
“And you don’t think you can do deeper?”
I shake my head and look at the glass in my hand. “For the first time, I want to. If I mess this up, though, a lot of people are going to get hurt. And then there’s the whole wedding thing. Noah’s getting married in less than a month. Even if I wanted to be with her, I couldn’t spring it on him right before his wedding. So here I am, drinking her out of my head and praying I can get past these next weeks so I can figure out what comes next.”
She blows out a long breath. “Did you tell her all of this? Does she know that you’re thinking about trying with her?”
I take another long sip and welcome the burn.I’m ready to get burned, she says.I shake the thought away. “Not exactly. I told her the kiss couldn’t happen again and that I needed time to figure some things out. I let her know shedeserved more than just a fuck from me.” I look at her and lift the side of my lips in an attempt at a smile. “No offense.”
“None taken,” she laughs. “I’m actually really glad it didn’t happen that night with us. I wasn’t in the right headspace, and it was so unlike me. I don’t do one-night stands. I guess I was just so hurt by my ex-boyfriend that I wanted to be reckless and forget for one night. So I’m thankful that your parts didn’t work.”
“Glad to benotof service,” I say dryly. “My parts work just fine, by the way. Just to clarify that again.”
“I’m sure they do.” Her eyes dance with amusement. “So what did she say when you told her all that?”
“She told me that we could work things out as we go. That no one needs to know right now until we do. I can’t sneak around behind Noah’s back for the next month. I wouldn’t be able to look him in the eye.” I look down at the table. “So I told her to go on the date she has planned this Sunday with some lifeguard-looking wannabe and to maybe ask him to be her date for the wedding.”
“You did what? You told her to go on a date? Why would you do that?” She looks at me like I’ve lost my mind.
“Because I didn’t want her to have to wait for me while I get my shit together. He seems like a nice guy, and for once, I’m trying not to stand in the way. He can give her what I can’t right now. Besides, she needs a date for the wedding, and I obviously can’t take her.”
“Jesus, men are so stubborn and just plain idiots sometimes. Have you ever stopped to consider that by saying that she’s taking it as a personal hit? She’s seen you take home beautiful women for years, and when she’s finally vulnerable enough to let you know that she likes you, you shut her down. How do you think she feels that you will sleep with all these women but not her? She’s probably wondering what they have that she doesn’t.”
Does she really think that? “But I told her she deserves more than the other girls I’ve been with.”
“Yeah, but then you told her to go date someone else. She obviously doesn’t care about your past, so why should you? She sees something in you and trusts you. You need to start believing in yourself and know that you have what it takes to make her happy.”
I think about what she just said, the alcohol making it hard to concentrate. I’ve never had a problem not believing in myself. Hell, my ego is probably too big when it comes to women. Bell is different, though, she’s...well, she’s Bell. With her, I get so unsure of myself and start questioning everything.
“So what do I do now?” I look at her across the table.
“You communicate with her. Tell her what you’re thinking, what you’re afraid of. Get on the same page with what you expect,” she says softly. I start to smile at her, and she looks at me curiously. “What’s the smile for?”
“I just realized I’ve been pouring out my problems to you, and I don’t even know your name.”
“Sara,” she says, smiling. “And you are?”
“Maverick, but most call me Mav.”
“It’s nice to meet you, Mav.”
“You too, Sara.” I get an idea and sit up straight. “So this might be a crazy idea to you and way too weird for you to say yes, but I need a date for the wedding. I was really dreading taking someone who would be hanging all over me all night, and most girls get the wrong ideas at weddings and start to get stars in their eyes. You would be perfect, though. You know the situation and won’t expect anything from me. Plus, I could really use someone to distract me from seeing Bell dance with whoever she brings.”
“I don’t know. I really don’t want to get in the middle of a triangle mess.”
“Please. You wouldn’t get in the middle, I promise. I’m telling Bell everything after the wedding is over, and if anything, she’ll be happy that you came with me.”
She studies me, lost in thought, while she decides what to do. After a moment, she says, “Okay, I’ll go with you. On one condition.”
“Name it.”
“There’s a work party that I have to go to next weekend. My ex will be there with the girl he cheated on me with. I need a hot date to shove in his face for the night.”
“Hot date, huh?” I ask, trying to hide my smile.
“Oh, please, we both know you’re hot. Will you do it?”
“Your ex won’t know what hit him,” I grin. “I’m in.”
“We’re quite the pair, aren’t we,” she laughs.
