Page 44 of When We Fell Again
“Let’s get you checked out.” The paramedic helped me to my feet. “We’ll go somewhere quieter.”
“Wait, has Joey finished yet?” I twisted around to see if I could see into the performance area.
A woman, who was the bar manager and who I’d met when we’d first arrived stepped in. “I think he’s nearly done. Don’t you worry about him. I’ll let him know what happened. Does he need to wait for you?”
“I, um.” I screwed up my eyes, trying to get my overworked brain to come up with an answer.
She patted my arm. “I’ll talk to him. You concentrate on feeling better.”
The paramedic and Sadie escorted me to an office behind the bar, where it was much quieter. I sank into one of the chairs and leaned down, putting my head between my knees.
“Do you feel sick?” asked the paramedic.
“No, just a bit dizzy.”
“You’re not pregnant, are you?” questioned Sadie.
Without lifting my head, I flipped her the finger.
“That’s one thing I can rule out, then,” joked the paramedic. “But let me check out a few other things because people don’t just faint for no reason.”
I sat back up, trying to ignore the nausea rolling around in my stomach. He ran through a list of questions and asked about my lifestyle. I answered him honestly, watching as his mouth pursed into a line.
When he’d finished, Sadie looked at him. “What’s the verdict?”
The paramedic stared at me directly. “You’re showing classic signs of exhaustion and need to get some rest. You’ll also need to make a doctor’s appointment to get fully checked over, including a blood test.”
“I’ve got a meeting at eight tomorrow morning. I’ll go after that.”
“Seriously, I think you should cancel that meeting and stay in bed.” He checked his watch. “It’s close to eleven now and you need a good eight hours’ sleep.”
Almost laughing out loud at his suggestion, I sank back into the chair, the realisation of what had just happened hitting me.
“I’ll sort out an Uber,” said Sadie, springing into action. “And make sure she gets home okay.”
The bar manager reappeared. “I explained what happened to Joey and he’s going to leave now. He said the set went well and he’ll get in touch with Theo.”
“Thanks.” I forced a weak smile, not liking the fact I was letting down one of my acts.
“He also said to feel better.” She hesitated in the doorway. “Can I get you anything?”
“Maybe some water.”
“Of course.”
With everyone fussing around me, I was glad to finally get back to my apartment nearly an hour later. Sadie wanted to stay with me, but I refused, wanting to be on my own.
I stripped off my clothes and slipped into a set of clean pyjamas. Padding into the kitchen, I poured myself a tall glass of iced water before grabbing some painkillers from the drawer. The action reminded me of Jordan, and I remembered he’d messaged me earlier. Going back into my bedroom, I got underneath the covers and pulled the duvet around me.
It was almost one in the morning and too late to phone Theo, even though he’d been at a gig too. I didn’t want to try and explain in a message, so I sent him a quick voice note to tell him I wouldn’t be meeting him later and that I needed a few days off. Trying not to lay the blame for my exhaustion at his door, I told him we should discuss our schedules when I felt better. After I’d said those words out loud, some of the stresses I’d been feeling lifted. It had been too easy to ignore the tiredness and stress, putting it down to overwork. But maybe the burnout was real and this was a wake-up call.
I went to switch off my phone so I could get some uninterrupted sleep when I spotted Jordan’s last message.
That had been the trigger for my collapse and, this time, he at least deserved a response.
Staring at the words, I tried to think of something to say back to him. Something that would make him realise how I felt. Several times, I started typing out a response, deleting it on each occasion. This had to be the time I didn’t back out, that I didn’t ignore him.
But what could I say?
