Page 68 of Love Me Ever After
Fifteen minutes later, Mum finally appeared.
“Ems, I’m so sorry I’m late.” She rushed up to the table, arms spread wide for a hug. “I, um, couldn’t get away.” Her cheeks flushed and I didn’t really want to contemplate the reasons as to why she’d been delayed.
I stood and embraced her. Stepping back, I checked out her appearance; a floaty floral maxi dress cinched at the waist and ballet pumps. Her dark honey blonde hair was curled to her shoulders, blue eyes sparkling and a wide smile on her lips. Seriously, she looked like my older sister rather than my mother.
We both sat down. The server came back and took our drinks orders, an Aperol Spritz for Mum and ginger beer for me.
“This is a surprise,” she said, once we were alone again. “I haven’t seen you since Christmas. What’s wrong?”
I fiddled with my knife and fork. “Why would something be wrong?”
“You call me out of the blue and ask to come and see me on the same day. Usually any visit takes lots of planning and discussion beforehand. You’ve never come on the spur of the moment.”
Jaqueline was totally right. One of the things about event planning being a part of my job meant I couldn’t help but apply the same logic to much of my personal life. I wasn’t a spur of the moment kind of girl. I found it hard to be spontaneous. But I assumed that suddenly being pregnantwithoutany kind of planning meant that I could change.
“I need to tell you something.” I gulped in some air, trying to summon up the courage to say the two words I needed to say.
Her brow wrinkled, the only indication that she was as old as she was. “Do I need to wait until my drink arrives?”
Wordlessly, I nodded. We sat in silence for a few minutes, neither of us able to come up with something to say until the waiter arrived with our drinks.
“Are you ready to order food?” he asked, glancing between the two of us.
My stomach was in knots, unsure if I could even contemplate food after I’d said what I had to. I opened my mouth to speak, but Mum chipped in. “Can you give us a few more minutes?”
She gave him a winning smile and he nodded before silently melting away into the busy restaurant. Sipping her Aperol Spritz, which reminded me of mine and Mason’s trip to Mallorca where I’d probably conceived, she looked at me. “Out with it.”
I took a huge slug of ginger beer to stop my lips sticking to my teeth. “I’m pregnant.”
The silence fell over our table like a heavy cloud. Jaqueline didn’t respond straight away, chewing on her bottom lip.
“Well, that wasn’t the news I was expecting at all,” she said, at last. “Although I did think it odd you are ordering a soft drink.”
She didn’t seem pleased or angry. In fact, she didn’t seem to show any emotion at all. I wanted her to cry with joy or shout or scream. Anything to show she cared about what I’d said.
“Are you pleased?” I pressed, needing some sort of reaction.
Avoiding looking at me, she twisted the stem of her glass around. “I just don’t want you to make the same mistakes I did.”
“What do you mean?”
Finally, she raised her eyes. “When I had you, I was too young. I’d just turned twenty and was at the start of an amazing career in the art world when I found out I was expecting. The path I thought I was going to go down suddenly changed and everything I thought I wanted got flipped on its head.” She paused. “I contemplated not going through with the pregnancy, but then I realised I couldn’t do that to you.”
Tears filled my eyes.I almost hadn’t existed?“What changed your mind?”
Jaqueline took a breath. “I was interning in a well-known gallery where I met your father. He was older than me, much older as you know. While we tried not to get involved, well, chemistry dictated otherwise. For several months, we sneaked around, enjoying the buzz of a secret relationship. If anyone at the gallery had found out, neither of us would have kept our jobs.” She paused. “Then, just like that, I was pregnant. Your father was seemingly on board with everything, and we were about to go public, but then he fell ill. I had to choose between looking after him, focusing on my career, or becoming a mother.” She stared me straight in the eye. “I chose you.”
She’d never told me that before. Only some very basic facts about how she and Dad had worked together, and how he’d died after a short illness.
A lump formed in my throat. We may not have had the closest mother and daughter bond but knowing she hadchosento have me when her life could have been very, very different, made me want to rewind and relive the past few years in another way. I wanted to do what she had done, even if I didn’t have any support.
Sipping some ginger beer to ensure I could speak, I blinked back tears again. “I think you’re going to make an amazing grandmother.”
Jaqueline reached across the table and grabbed my hand. “And you’ll be an amazing mother. We can do this. Together.” She paused. “Who’s the father?”
“Mason.”
Her brows shot up. “Really? I didn’t even know you two were back together.”
