Page 1 of Lost in Her
Prologue
Jennifer
Fourteen years ago
The life I was born into was not the life that I chose.I was chained the moment I was able to walk, and since then, my life has been nothing more than a nightmare that I can’t seem to escape.
I see the outside world and want so badly to be a part of it, but I know he will never let me go.And why would he when he owns me?He owned me from the moment I was born.
I am nothing more than a slave.Another girl doing whatever they tell us to do.
I want out.
I want to escape, but I can’t seem to find the courage to run away.
This is my life.This is all I have.
They have broken me.He has broken me.
They have conditioned me.He has conditioned me.
And now I am nothing more than a shattered soul.
I can’t be put back together.I am what I am.I am what they have made me.What he has made me.
To the outside world, he is one of the wealthiest producers of porn.
To me, he is my father, my master, my abuser.
To the outside world, I am a porn star.They don’t see the scars on my body or the tears rolling down my face before each take.
They only see what they want to see.
Present
They always lock the doors, but today, they didn’t.They were too busy getting off on the films to notice that the door was left unlocked.I take a deep breath as I slowly stand and make my way to the door.
I can hear the moaning from the other side.I know what those men are doing.They are all getting off on the take they just had me do repeatedly.They made me do it until my father thought it was perfect.He doesn’t care what this is doing to me.He only cares about the money I am bringing in.He is wealthy from my abuse.He is wealthy from making me do things no father would ever have their daughter do, but just like my mother was, I am a cash ticket, that is all.
I slowly lift my shaky hand and grab onto the doorknob.I feel my heart racing so fast.It is now or never.They may never forget to lock the door again.They even forgot to put my chains back on.Men are all the same.They only want one thing from you, and once they get it, they throw you away like trash.That is what my father taught me.
I take a deep breath as I turn the doorknob and slowly push the door open.I peek my head out.They are all in the film room.
I look to the left, but no one—all of them are in there watching the take.
I push the door open more as I slowly slip out of the door and into the dark hallway.I turn to the left and see the exit sign over the door.Why they lock us all up so close to the exit doors, I will never know.Maybe because they think none of us are stupid enough to try and run, and before, I wouldn’t be, but it has been fourteen years.Fourteen years of me being my father’s cash ticket, and I know if I don’t try and escape now, I will die here.Die being their sex slave.
I slowly make my way down the hallway.With each step, my heartbeat gets faster and faster.I stand in front of the exit door and push on it, trying my hardest not to make a sound.If they hear me, I fear the punishment that will follow.I wouldn’t survive what they would do to me.What my father would do to me.
I slowly continue to push the door open until there is enough room for me to get out.I don’t need much room.I am skinny.My bones are showing from the lack of food they give me.Another condition they have made me learn.I don’t eat until the job is done.I don’t eat until my father is happy with the results of the take, which sometimes takes days.I have learned to not need food as much.I can survive.I always have.
I slide out of the door, turning around quickly, making sure when it shuts, it doesn’t make a sound.I have gotten good at being quiet.You need to learn to not make a sound if you want to survive.
I quickly make my way down the stairs, looking both ways down the alley.It is quiet, just past lunchtime.I look to the right and see the woods.I just need to make it to the woods.
I always found it funny how my father decided to put the porn studio next to a nightclub, but then again, my father has soundproofed the studio so no one can hear our screams.Believe me, I have tried.
I slowly make my way down the alley toward the nightclub and the woods.I use the stone wall to keep myself up as each step gets me closer and closer to my freedom.I see a beer van not that far away from me.The back door to the club is open and getting restocked for tonight.
