Page 117 of The One I Love
“What does that mean, Amelia?” Mom asks. “Because I’m all sorts of confused right now.”
I pour Mom and Barb each a cup of coffee and explain to them everything. The kiss. The dates. The secret that was only a secret to some. That everything we told them at the diner that day, up to the engagement, was real. Then Paul was told about an engagement and all hell broke loose.
“Paul? As in that good for nothin’ ex-son-in-law of mine? This is all because of him?”
“Well, partly,” I say.
“Oh, this ought to be good…”
I fill them in on the day that everything started spiraling out of control. As I’m telling them the story, their jaws drop a little more. Then I get to the part of the story at Mona’s when thingsreally snowballed, and I’m pretty sure they think I’m making this up.
“Amelia, I know I’m biased in this conversation because I want you, and have always wanted you, to be with my son. But that ex of yours is a real shit stain.”
“You’re not wrong, Barb,” I say through laughter. Cause at this point all I can do is laugh.
“So, you saidpartlyearlier,” Mom says. “Paul was a big reason. What is the other?”
Oh God is she going to make me say this out loud?
“You. And you, Barb. It was both of you.”
There’s a second of quiet before Mom yells so loud the dogs two blocks away hear her.
“Us! This whole confounded thing was because of us? Barb! Did you hear her? She’s blaming us!”
“Oh, I heard her,” Barb says, who is grabbing her cell phone out of her purse. “Where is my son? He has some explaining to do.”
“Barb, don’t call Shane. Please.” I grab her wrist to stop her. “This was my idea. Just like before, going with the secret and the lie, it was my idea. This is my fault.”
“Why would you do that?” Mom asks. “Why didn’t you tell us?”
“We tried. We tried to stop you that day at Mona’s. We told you we had something to say, and you waved us away to start planning the wedding.”
“Well, we wouldn’t have walked away if we knew it was something big,” Mom says dismissively. “You should have told us.”
I can’t with her right now.
“Mom. We tried. And then I thought, I don’t know, that maybe after the excitement calmed down that we could sit down and explain everything.”
“Why didn’t you?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. Partially because it was happening so fast. Then all of a sudden, we were at bridal and wedding appointments. And…well…Shane wanted to. I didn’t. I didn’t know what to do, and next thing you know I’m sitting in a dressing room with wedding gowns, and I don’t know, for half a second I considered going through with it.”
I hate admitting that, because that perked them both right up. “You’re considering it?”
I shake my head. “No. I told him that I wasn’t ready. And I meant that. Every time I thought ‘maybe I could,’ a voice jumped in, reminding me why we’re not ready. We had a huge fight, and we haven’t talked since the day we went dress shopping.”
“Amelia!” Mom yells. “How could you turn him down after he asked you to marry him?”
“He never asked me!” I stand back up, needing to keep my temper down because I feel it rising again. “He said, ‘maybe we should.’ That’s not a proposal, Mom. And then it hit me—for the second time in my life, I was feeling forced into a marriage I wasn’t ready for. Back then it was because I was young and pregnant. Now it’s because a comedy of errors forcing my hand. Like hell I’m going to have my second marriage be another one I wasn’t ready for just because everyone else wanted me to do it.”
“What do you mean, forced?” Mom asked. “Who has ever forced you to get married?”
I stop and stare at her. I don’t blink. It has to be at least thirty seconds before I realize she actually has no idea what she did. Granted, I’ve never talked to her about it. Like many things from that part of my life, I pushed them under the rug. But I can’t believe she never saw it.
“You, Mom. It was you.”
“I never?—”
