Page 29 of The One I Love
Okay. She didn’t see the kiss. But what she saw was enough.
“I can explain.”
She shakes her head and gives my hand a squeeze. “There’s nothing to explain. All I saw was a man and a woman walk outside. And then a woman who came back a few minutes later looking like her world had been flipped upside down.”
Well, shit. Here I thought we were stealthy that night. “It’s…I don’t know, Betsy. So much happened, and so much could happen, but I also don’t want anything to happen and do want everything to happen. Does that make sense?”
“Strangely, it does.”
“I also feel weird talking to you because I don’t want the guys finding out and I don’t want you to lie to Wes. I’m just…I’m so confused.”
God, that felt good to say.
“I get that,” Betsy says. “And I don’t want to put you in an awkward spot. But can I give you one piece of advice?”
“Please.”
“I dated a lot of guys before Wes. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned about men, it’s that if they want to, they will. Ifthey don’t, they can’t be bothered. You need to be with a man who will, because you deserve that and so much more.”
Betsy gives my hand one more squeeze before she heads inside.
If he wanted to, he would.
I never thought of that before. Paul never wanted to, and he never did. Shane? I think Shane’s been doing that for years, and I didn’t notice. Or I took it for granted. Probably a little bit of both.
I get back in my car but I don’t pull out of the driveway. All I can do is sit and think about everything Shane has done for me and my kids over the years. He comes to their events. He takes my car in to get oil changes because I never remember to. One year Mariah told him she wanted a real Christmas tree because we’d never had one. That man went out the next day and chopped down an eight-foot tree for the family room and another smaller one for her bedroom. He sat down and had the talk with Luke—I know because I accidentally walked in on said talk and Luke wouldn’t look at me for a week.
I can’t think of four things Paul has done in their lives that I didn’t have to force him to do. He used to bitch about changing diapers, and that is literally the bare minimum as a father.
And it just wasn’t things with the kids. He never helped around the house. Every chore and project fell on me. Then there were the little things. I can’t remember a time when Paul just kissed me because he wanted to. Or brought home flowers just because. Hell, he didn’t even do it on our anniversary. Sex was sporadic at best and never ended in anything pleasurable on my end. I never felt beautiful or cherished or loved. I thought I did, but looking back now I know that wasn’t the case.
Hell, with one kiss and one night, I felt more loved with Shane than I did for years with Paul. Just one night changedeverything. Changed my perspective. Threw my world for a loop.
Shane wanted to kiss me. He wanted to hold me. He wanted to be with me.
He wanted to. And he did.
I grab my phone and pull up my text thread with Shane. I know he asked me not to contact him until I thought about it some more. And I have. There are the cons and the scary things. But there are also the things I can’t deny anymore. And we need them all out on the table.
Amelia: Can you meet me for breakfast at Mona’s?
I don’t even have to wait more than five seconds for a response.
Shane: I’ll have your coffee and waffles ready. And I’ll get you an apple juice just in case you want it. And don’t worry, I’ll make sure to order extra syrup.
I smile as I head home to change into something presentable.
I know this might be reckless. I know it could blow up in my face.
But I want to.
So I am.
Chapter 9
Amelia
Breathe,Amelia. It’s just Shane. It’s just breakfast. You’re just talking.
