Page 59 of The One I Want
“Yes, I am,” I begin. “But there are some things that haven’t changed. She’s still my nanny. I give her a paycheck. My kids love her. If we tried this, and it didn’t go well and she left, my kids would be devastated. They might take that harder than the divorce.”
“And?”
I look over to Shane. “And what?”
“And you’re scared.”
“I’m what?”
“Scared,” he says. “Listen, most guys take time after a divorce. Especially one that uprooted your life as much as it did. If you didn’t date for two years, I don’t think anyone would bat an eye. But here you are, fresh out of one relationship and thinking about jumping into another one. Which is scary. You’re allowed to be scared. The question is if she’s worth jumping into something this soon. Is she the real deal, where the timing just happens to be shit? Or do you think it’s just a matter of convenience?”
Shane doesn’t say a lot, but when he does, the man is spot…fucking…on.
I am scared. I hate to admit it, but I am. I was just left by the woman I thought I’d spend my entire life with. Thinking about another relationship is scary. The fear of being left again. The fear of not knowing what I’m doing because it’s been more than a decade since I’ve been with another woman. Those things, and a slew of others I can’t even think of right now, are fucking terrifying.
What if Shane is right? What if she’s here, in front of me, and I’m having feelings for her because I’m going through a hard time and she’s being nice to me and my kids? That’s a real possibility.
Then I think about the kiss. It set off fireworks inside me. I haven’t felt like that from a kiss in my entire life. She felt so good in my arms I never wanted to let her go. When we went to bed, she wrapped her arm and leg around me, using my shoulder as a pillow, like we’ve slept next to each other a million times.
And that’s what it felt like. It didn’t feel weird. It didn’t feel awkward. It felt like she was home. Where she was supposed to be.
I have thought for weeks that she felt like part of our family. Last night proved that she’s meant to be there.
“No,” I say.
“No what?”
“No, she's not convenient. No, I don't have feelings for her because she’s at the right place at the right time. I would be miserable if I didn’t at least try. I would hit Simon in the fucking jaw if he hit on her again. I want her. All of her. I can only hope she feels the same way.”
“Hell yeah,” Shane says.
“This is beautiful,” Oliver says. “I can’t wait until you propose.”
“Easy there, Romeo,” I say. “I’m not you.”
I look over to Simon, who hasn’t said anything. Usually he would have some smart ass remark about now.
“Nothing?”
He holds up his coffee mug, and we all follow.
“To Wes and Betsy,” he says. “At least we all like this one.”
Chapter23
Wes
“Hey! I’m home!”
I don’t hear anything, which is odd. Betsy’s Jeep is parked in the driveway. I know the kids were picked up hours ago. If I didn’t already know from Betsy, I would have from Cara, who texted to tell me thank you for allowing her to see the kids. As well as adding a dig about Betsy.
I continue walking into the house, but still, silence. Which in this house, usually means trouble.
“Hello? Anyone?”
I walk through the kitchen and into the living room. No one there. I check in the playroom, where usually I can at least find Magnolia, but again, nothing.
It isn’t until I start walking up the stairs that I start hearing giggles coming from the spare bedroom. I walk toward it, now able to hear conversation.
