Page 57 of Breakout
“We’re pretty boring,” I tease, making him laugh.
“Nah, we’re not boring. We just have our priorities straight.” He reaches across the table again, taking my hands.
I love the way he wants to touch me all the time. It’s scary to admit, but I want all the PDA he will give, even if it ruins the illusion we are letting everyone believe.
Clearing my throat, I ask, “Have you heard from your parents?”
His hand jerks in mine, but he doesn’t pull away. “No, now that you mention it, though, that alone is enough for concern.”
“What makes you say that?” I ask.
I know he mentioned that marrying me would help with his parents, but I never quite asked what he meant by that. Now I am dying to know.
“Because that means they are up to something, and I just don’t know it yet.”
“Do they know?”
Have you told them about us?
I don’t know why, but I want them to know.
“No, I will soon, though. As fucked up as it is, I try to avoid interacting with them first and make them come to me. It’s better that way.”
Sadness fills me. I didn’t have a choice with my parents, and here he is avoiding his. I think it’s better that mine are dead. I wonder how much pain it causes him to know that his parents are alive, but he can’t stand to be around them.
“Not everyone can have a kick-ass parent like Clay and Cora,” I muse.
Beckett chuckles. “Yeah, no one is like Ms. James. I’m pretty sure Brett is half in love with the woman. Well, with her cooking at least.”
“Speaking of Brett, how’s he doing with everything? Last time I tried to ask, he shut down completely.”
Before the season started, Brett got hurt badly enough where they gave him a medical redshirt for the year. That means he won’t get to play this season with the boys, but he won’t completely miss out and will still get to play four years’ worth of college hockey when he completes his senior season next year. It has to be hard to watch his friends play knowing that he already had his last game with them. It reminds you that anything can end at the drop of a hat. Makes you want to appreciate what you have when you have it.
“He’s going through something, he just won’t say what.” Beckett’s eyes fill with worry. “I am trying to be there for him, but I also want to be here for you. It’s been tough.”
“Hey, he will talk to you when he’s ready, okay? Don’t worry too much. He knows that if he needs you that you will be there. I’ll understand when that day comes. You don’t have to choose between me and him.”
I watch as some of the stress melts off his face. I wonder how long he has felt that way. I hate that it had anything to do with me.
“You’re probably right, but still. It’s hard. We had plans and…”
“And plans change. It sucks, but that’s life.”
I know from experience. I went from being a happy, loved little girl to a sad orphan in a matter of hours. You can’t dwell on what could have been, though. You have to push forward and focus on the future.
“I’m just hoping that life will start to be a little kinder to him, is all. He’s a great guy. I wish it had happened to me instead.”
“Don’t say that. I’m sure he wouldn’t want that. Things will get better for him. He has a great group of friends and a bright future.”
More than I ever had. I made it with nothing but my own determination. Brett already has a leg up. He only needs to rely on those closest to him. Honestly, I’m envious of him. I wish I had that.
You kind of do now.
The thought filters into my head, but I brush it off. I can give all the advice in the world, but I’m the worst at taking it myself. I’ve been alone so long I have no idea how to rely on another person.
Beckett takes a deep breath and shifts in his seat. “Speaking of us…there’s something I want to talk to you about.”
“What’s up?”
