Page 68 of Of Nightmares & Fire
The Neer people knew who my brother and I were the moment we arrived at the small village at the border between kingdoms. Diemos was a lush green wilderness I was enchanted by, and Eathian was a scorching desert I was ready to burn the way it did me. The stark differences only became more apparent as I grew older.Especially with the new king and his tyrannical way of treating the people he was claiming to be his.
It was Queen Phaedra who helped me work through my emotions. She started me in training with her military; it was fairly quick for the higher-level generals to realize that Mavros and I were different. Mavros joined just to have something to do, but it was something that gave me purpose. I needed to feel useful in some way. Before my parents perished, my entire life was mapped out for me. I knew what to expect in the long term and how I was going to get there. When they died, all of that changed. The life as I knew it died with them.
Meeting Astraea feels the same. The moment she came into my life, I no longer knew what my purpose was. I am once again an angry adolescent needing purpose and trying to find my way.
The portal drops us unceremoniously into the Damalis Tarn. Its deep murky water lets no light penetrate its surface, and when we are engulfed with the cool mountain water, it’s like we are being devoured by shadows. I keep a tight hold on Astraea even as she panics in my arms, and I kick my feet hard to start back up. When we breach the surface, she gasps for air, and I too suck in a gulping breath before bellowing an uncharacteristic laugh.
“Are you seriously laughing?!” She yells, wiping her hair from her face and the water from her eyes. I fling the hair that has come loose from the tie at the back of my head away from my face too, spraying her with droplets, and she squeals. “Kyros!”
“You should see your face, Shula.” I trap my lip in my teeth trying to bite back a smile as I keep one arm wrapped around herwaist. I brush my thumb along her lips. Wiping away the water droplets that collected there. We are both breathing hard, wading in the center of the tarn. The mountain casting us in its shadow as the sun makes its way to crown its peak.
She groans, pushing me in the chest, and says nothing before she spins in my arms. She's about to swim away, but then her breath catches and her head tips back, finally taking in the view of the mountain. My lips curl as I pull her back to me, leaving my arm wrapped around her waist, I whisper into her ear.
“Welcome to Diemos, Shula."
Chapter forty-seven
Astraea
Mybreathgetscaughtin my throat. All of my agitation over being dumped into the tarn is forgotten when I spin around to swim away and I see where we are. The mountain takes up my vision. It stands tall, like a jagged tooth in a monster's mouth. Behind it, rows and rows of sharp points reach into the sky like a beast's maw open in a mighty roar. Lush greens, reds, oranges, and purples paint the trees that crowd the water's edge, and not far off, a thin dark waterfall feeds the small body of water we wade in.
“Welcome to Diemos.” Kyros’ breath puffs out at my ear, and the heat of his body presses into my back as he slinks his arm around my waist, pulling me flush with him. I’m at a loss for words,so I say nothing at all. I lean into his embrace and let him hold my weight as I rest the back of my head on his chest and fully take in the vision of it all. Never did I imagine I would see such a sight. Its beauty is breathtaking. It feels like we wade in the center of the rounded pool of water for hours, but I know it could only be minutes. Kyros says nothing and leaves me to bask in it. Only when he begins tracing small circles on my stomach where my shirt has risen do I come back into my body.
“Why did you bring me here?” I finally ask. I know it's where we are heading with the others, but something about this place feels almost sacred. I lift my chin so I can see his face. He does not look at me but instead looks out over the water, too. The sun is now fully crowning the mountain, and its shadow is beginning to shift, exposing more of the water. I thought the water was dark because of the shadows, but even now as the rays from the sun shine down on it, they don’t penetrate the surface. The water is black as onyx, and the ripples created by our wading and the trickle of water coming from the nearby waterfall cause it to glitter in the sunshine.
“I could tell you needed a little escape,” he says, bringing his gaze to meet mine. The black waters reflect in his nearly black eyes and are just as breathtaking as the scenery. His words bring heat to every inch of my skin, and he seems to notice. “Do you want to see my favorite spot?” He asks, and I give him a coy smile.
“I think I would love that.” I tell him, and he nods before starting to push us closer to the shoreline. As we get further away from the center of the tarn, I notice more details of the land. Earlymorning birdsong fills the air, and small animals frolic through the bushes and patches of tall grass. The wooded area is similar to where we were before Kyros rendered a portal, but the air here is thinner. Cooler. Sun filters through the multi-hued leaves, lighting them like a prism of color, and their shadows dance across the deadwood of the forest floor.
When we reach the area where I can touch the tarn’s rocky floor, Kyros lets me out of his hold. His hand stays steady, pressed to my low back. I know he said that he brought me here because I needed to escape, but as I watch him out of the corner of my eye, I can see the tension that holds his shoulders tight too.
“Is everything ok?” I can’t help but ask him. He takes a deep breath before responding.
“Just thinking.” His voice is deep and low, and the crease between his eyes flattens as he gives me a small smile. It doesn’t reach his eyes and falls away as quickly as it came.
We are a sopping wet mess when we emerge on land. My blood-drenched clothing is washed pink where it was stained crimson, and it clings to me like a second skin. Kyros pulls his tunic off as I am wringing the bottom of mine out. I feel the blush crawl over my skin as he looks over his shoulder, and I quickly avert my gaze. Heat blazes in my cheeks, and he smirks.
Turning to face the woods that seem alive with their own kind of magick, he keeps his back to me. He is silent for minutes just watching nature. Something about him feels different, like he’s lost in his own mind. I leave him to think. I know how it is to have so many thoughts stirring through your mind; you feel as though youare lost navigating the endless static. Sometimes it's best to be left alone to find your way through it.
If I am going to have any semblance of dry clothes when we return, I suppose I too need to hang things to dry. Peeling the fabric from my body, I wring the borrowed tunic out further and then hang it on a low branch. The tree’s leaves are like paper gold. A breeze rustles the leaves, and they nearly glisten just as the precious metal would in the sun. A chill rolls over my exposed skin, causing gooseflesh to pepper my arms and stomach as I turn back to face Kyros, with only a band of fabric covering my breasts and the already exposing breeches Cole put me in.
“I was twelve the first time I came to this forest. A year after I lost my parents.” Kyros doesn’t turn to face me as he begins talking, but I keep my eyes on his back where he stands close to the treeline. The muscles of his shoulders flex in time with his fists at his sides, like the words themselves have caused him pain. I stay silent, letting him continue in his own time. After a few moments, he reaches up, plucking a deep green leaf with orange around its edges, making it look as though it is on fire. He brings it in front of his face, his fingers pinching the stem, and rolls it between them. The leaf spins back and forth, blurring and appearing like he is holding a black flame at his fingertips. It’s as beautiful as it is magickal. “Mavros and I lived in Aithne and explored the border but were forbidden to go too far into Diemos. The forest held magick and creatures that we were not yet old enough to protect ourselves against.” He drops the leaf, and it flutters to the ground at his feet.
After another moment he turns to face me. His lips part as he sees that I have shed my tunic too. I realized a while ago that Kyros makes me feel seen, but right now, I feel like more than just my skin is exposed to him. I feel like he sees everything—right down to my battered soul—and he is giving me a glimpse through the window at his.
“But you found this place?” I ask, sinking my teeth into my bottom lip as his eyes skate down my body and land back on my eyes.
“It seems like I am destined to find happiness in things that are forbidden.” He says solemnly, taking a step toward me. There are feet between us, but it feels like we have never felt closer. I swallow hard. “This way.” He offers me his hand, and I place mine in his. Warmth spreads through me as he threads our fingers together and guides me away from the water’s edge and further through the trees.
The ground is mostly flat, but as we continue to walk, it does seem to slope upward. The sun filters through the leaves and illuminates the dust particles we stir in our trek. While I watch the glittering specks dance around in my vision, swirling only when my body or Kyros cuts in, I can't help but smile. This whole journey is opening my eyes to so many things I didn’t know beyond the castle walls. The world that I always felt was small is now more vast than time and space itself.
“It was the first time I learned I was a render.” Kyros’ voice startles me out of my reverie, and I stumble over my own feet. He looks back. The hand that he has securely threaded with mine doesn’tallow me to fall, and I smile sheepishly as he looks down at my feet. He doesn’t comment on my clumsiness. “Mavros and I have always been different. Twins, but polar opposites in everything but the genes we share. We had an argument, and being young near-adolescent men, anger was our outlet. We came to blows. It was the first time we made each other bleed. I caused him to fall down a sharp embankment, and he broke his arm.” He stops, seemingly lost in the memory.
“Anyway, after that, seeing him in the infirmary and remembering he was the only family I had left… I felt like something inside me needed to know what it truly felt like to be alone. I needed a reminder not to take advantage of being blessed enough by the divine that my brother and I escaped what was meant to be our fates.
I walked further into the forest than I was ever allowed. Mavros and I just recently learned of our magick. The elders in town were worried about the attention that our markings would bring.” As he says it, I look at the black shadows that vibrate along his skin—tattoos when he wants them to be.
“The magick was charged by my heightened emotions, and when I reared back to punch a tree, I unknowingly let the shadows uncoil. When my fist was meant to hit the bark, the shadows whipped out, and my first portal was rendered right there.
