Page 60 of Splintered Memories
No.
I shook my head harder. That fist inside my chest clenched hard around the flames inside me, keeping that emotion firmly locked down. Even so, the tears threatened. I couldn’t let them go.
August let out a sharp sigh, pinching my chin between his thumb and forefinger and tilting my face up to his. Those eyes were a beautiful shade of gray, slightly darker in the dim moonlight filtering in through the window.
“So stubborn,” he mused, affection saturating his tone. “So strong.”
But I wasn’t strong. I only pretended. It was a facade. Inside these walls—the walls I’d built around my mind, around my heart—it was chaos. It was nothing but fire and confusion and fear. So much fear.
“August.” His name was a whispered plea. “I can’t.”
It was his turn to shake his head, a flash of disgust flitting over his features. “You can do anything.” His eyes held mine, and there was so much desperation in his gaze that I almost flinched. “You need to let go of all those feelings I know you hide within yourself before it kills you. You’re safe with me,” he said, the words firm and solid. They were a promise. A vow.
My stupid heart melted from the fire I was desperately forcing down. That fist holding down the ball of heat began to tremble.
Safe.
I was safe.
But was I? Physically, I knew that I was. I knew that these arms surrounding me would protect me at all costs. This body, so close to mine, would die before anything marred my skin.
But there was nothing safe about the look August Ramsey was giving me. There was nothing safe about the heat in his eyes, a heat that rivaled my own. And behind that heat…behind the wanting we’dboth been fighting, there was something more. And it was the possibility of more that was utterly, completely…unsafe.
I started to tremble, and I pressed myself back against the wall, placing my palms flush against the drywall and leaning into it for dear life.
August erased the small sliver of space I’d made between our bodies, taking it like he was starving for this heat I was losing my grasp of. Goose bumps pricked my skin as so much of him touched me. He flattened his hands on either side of my head, and I realized I wasn’t the only one shaking. There was a slight tremor in the muscles of his arms. We were so incredibly close, I could see the pulse fluttering in his neck, quick and frantic, just like mine.
“Let go,” he repeated. His words lowered to a whisper, but lost none of their bite. It was a command. A plea.
I couldn’t speak as I clamped my jaw shut, not trusting myself. I was barely holding it together, my grasp on my emotions coming undone under his asking.
I shook my head, but he dipped his chin, freezing me again as his face became even closer. His lips were so near to my mouth that my skin tingled.
He still didn’t stop. He continued to lower his head, tilting it slightly until that terrifying, beautiful mouth of his skimmed the top of my collarbone.
A shiver vibrated through me, so violently my knees quaked. I might’ve sunk to the floor if he wasn’t pressed up against me.
“You’re safe, Emy,” he murmured, pressing a soft kiss against the sensitive dip below my clavicle.
My eyes closed, relishing the feel of his lips and his words.
“Let go.” He kissed the delicate skin between my neck and shoulder. “Let go.” His lips brushed my neck, working their way up in soft, gentle touches. “Let go.” He kissed the underside of my jaw. “It’s safe.”
Each murmured mantra uncurled a finger of that mighty fist inside my chest. I couldn’t fight it anymore as I lost my grip on that red ball of flames. I was hanging by a finger, panting and trembling as August’s lips found the corner of mine.
“Let. Go.”
And I did. Those final words unfastened that last finger, and I lost my grip on everything.
Heat ravaged me, bursting out from my chest in scalding waves.
They were too hot and too intense, and I didn’t know what to do. I wasn’t ready for the years of pain that had been locked up tight inside me. I wasn’t ready for that decimating hurt, and I grappled for the one thing that felt the safest.
August.
I reached for him. My arms wrapped around his neck and with one slight turn of my head, my lips found his.
I crushed myself against him. My hands trailed up into his hair, gripping tight as my mouth moved against his. He tasted like everything I’d imagined…like sweet mint gum and spice and something else. Something just him.
